i, unfortunately, have an addictive personality. i have had problems with both cocaine and alcohol abuse. i was also bulemic for awhile, which i think is an addictive tendency. however. while i have been through some tough addictions and struggles, i think that God has intended that i now use these experiences in a positive way. i can't change my past, but i can find the wise and gracefull things from even the most evil. by experiencing these things i have a large sense of empathy, of caring, of unconditional love, of grace, of forgiveness, of looking at yourself objectively and actively taking a stance to change things, of finding courage at your weakest moment, of learning to understand the true nature of your self within the murk of the world and it's pressures, of what it means to be completely dependant upon God, drawing pure strength from God, and wisdom. i guess i thank God for loving me even despite the fact that i've alienated myself from Him @ times and i thank him for giving me eyes that sees that i can take these horrible times in my life and turn them into blessings.