- Jul 16, 2022
- 1
- 1
- 28
- Country
- Australia
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Single
Hi all,
This might be a bit of a long one, but I appreciate any help I can get. I became a Christian around 7 months ago, and I have some questions regarding the faith and my experiences.
For background I have an extremely obessive personality, suffering severe OCD, paranoia and anxiety and prior to coming to Christ was a drug addict (great combo).
At the first few months of professing Christ and coming to him I was still using drugs. One night while high, I had prayed and witnessed a man of pure light in the clouds open the clouds and bestow an angel of pure light upon me (which looked like a dove). Yes, I was high, however this was nothing I have ever experienced before.
At this point I had no true understanding about the holy spirit or anything like that. I had read that satan disguises himself as an angel of light and feared greatly. I rebuked it not being sure of what it was, but now I am certain it was the holy spirit. So I suffer in fear that I accidentally may have blasphemed the spirit. I know in my heart I would never mean to do that and that blasphemy is a matter of the heart. God also says ignorant sins are different from high-handed ones.
Anyway I continued trying to learn and understand the Bible. I came to a preacher speaking about the trinity. I then tried to explain the concept to my grandmother who is a Jehovah witness, and she told me the trinity was all rubbish.
So I started reading about non-trinitarian positions. At the same time I was reading Daniel and Revelation. Additionally my mother handed me a book she had found about Sunday law by the 7th day adventists. So it seemed that God was showing me all these signs about what I was to look into. I came to the understanding that the Catholic church is corrupt from all this. I considered the trinity and sunday sabbath to be catholic inventions so I started going to a non-trinitarian saturday sabbath keeping church.
I felt something was wrong with the church. I heard them speak about the sabbath and holy days more than Jesus. So I prayed to God asking for the truth. I see now that Jesus is the sabbath rest.
I was still unsure about the trinity and nature of the holy spirit, so I prayed to God about it and recently met a man who explained the personhood of the holy spirit and clarified the "trinity" to me. I understand it fully now, but am afraid that I may have apostised by ignorance, having fallen for false doctrine. I pray God will have mercy upon me. I have only been eager to follow God's way and the word Christ, but fear I have made a complete shipwreck of the faith. I feel I have failed God.
This might be a bit of a long one, but I appreciate any help I can get. I became a Christian around 7 months ago, and I have some questions regarding the faith and my experiences.
For background I have an extremely obessive personality, suffering severe OCD, paranoia and anxiety and prior to coming to Christ was a drug addict (great combo).
At the first few months of professing Christ and coming to him I was still using drugs. One night while high, I had prayed and witnessed a man of pure light in the clouds open the clouds and bestow an angel of pure light upon me (which looked like a dove). Yes, I was high, however this was nothing I have ever experienced before.
At this point I had no true understanding about the holy spirit or anything like that. I had read that satan disguises himself as an angel of light and feared greatly. I rebuked it not being sure of what it was, but now I am certain it was the holy spirit. So I suffer in fear that I accidentally may have blasphemed the spirit. I know in my heart I would never mean to do that and that blasphemy is a matter of the heart. God also says ignorant sins are different from high-handed ones.
Anyway I continued trying to learn and understand the Bible. I came to a preacher speaking about the trinity. I then tried to explain the concept to my grandmother who is a Jehovah witness, and she told me the trinity was all rubbish.
So I started reading about non-trinitarian positions. At the same time I was reading Daniel and Revelation. Additionally my mother handed me a book she had found about Sunday law by the 7th day adventists. So it seemed that God was showing me all these signs about what I was to look into. I came to the understanding that the Catholic church is corrupt from all this. I considered the trinity and sunday sabbath to be catholic inventions so I started going to a non-trinitarian saturday sabbath keeping church.
I felt something was wrong with the church. I heard them speak about the sabbath and holy days more than Jesus. So I prayed to God asking for the truth. I see now that Jesus is the sabbath rest.
I was still unsure about the trinity and nature of the holy spirit, so I prayed to God about it and recently met a man who explained the personhood of the holy spirit and clarified the "trinity" to me. I understand it fully now, but am afraid that I may have apostised by ignorance, having fallen for false doctrine. I pray God will have mercy upon me. I have only been eager to follow God's way and the word Christ, but fear I have made a complete shipwreck of the faith. I feel I have failed God.
