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<blockquote data-quote="Darrin" data-source="post: 64047546" data-attributes="member: 336858"><p>November 11, 2011</p><p> </p><p><em>O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure. </em></p><p><em>Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed. </em></p><p><em>My soul is also sore vexed: but thou, O LORD, how long? </em></p><p><em>Return, O LORD, deliver my soul: oh save me for thy mercies' sake. </em></p><p><em>For in death there is no remembrance of thee: in the grave who shall give thee thanks? </em></p><p><em>I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears. </em></p><p><em>Mine eye is consumed because of grief; it waxeth old because of all mine enemies. </em></p><p><em>Depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity; for the LORD hath heard the voice of my weeping. </em></p><p><em>The LORD hath heard my supplication; the LORD will receive my prayer. (Psalms 6:1-9)</em></p><p> </p><p>Sometimes, I want to write and the words just wont come. I copied this psalm of David, and was going to add my own prayer. I guess some prayers are between us and God, because every thing I tried to write went nowhere and was deleted. I didnt delete the psalm because its my favorite, and it says so much.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>November 15, 2011</p><p> </p><p>We received mail today from Angela Grauke. She sent three pamphlets.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p style="text-align: center"><em><span style="font-size: 15px">Trust in the Lord</span></em></p><p></p><p> </p><p style="text-align: center"><em>This is the love that sought us,</em></p> <p style="text-align: center"><em>This is the love that brought us</em></p> <p style="text-align: center"><em>From the darkness</em></p> <p style="text-align: center"><em>To the joys of life.</em></p><p></p><p><em> As He gave His life</em></p><p style="text-align: center"><em>out of love for us,</em></p> <p style="text-align: center"><em>may we live each day </em></p> <p style="text-align: center"><em>out of love for Him</em></p><p></p><p> </p><p><em>Sometimes it seems as though life doesnt make sense. Circumstances and situations cause us to wonder about Gods love for us.</em></p><p> </p><p style="text-align: center"><em>My Testimony</em></p><p></p><p> </p><p><em>Abandoned at the age of ten months, by my grandfather because I was an illegitimate child, I was institutionalized for the first seventeen years of my life.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>At this time, we orphans were told that we belonged to the English Government. Since there was an over population of orphans in England after World War II, The English Government decided to ship a bunch of us off to other parts of the world. The group I was in was shipped to Sydney, Australia. This was my first chance to see the outside world. The world beyond the walls.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>We were on the ship with other children from other parts of England for six long weeks. When we arrived in Australia, the children were lined up, separated, and transported to different institutions.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>I remember being physically and sexually abused before I was twelve years old. I was hospitalized for a while, then sent to another much larger and different institution.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>By the time I was fifteen years old, my real mother found out that I was still living, after her father confessed what he did prior to 16 years ago. She now lived in America and had a family. She wanted to have me with her. She made arrangements and I was in the states within one year after receiving my first letter from her. One week after our reunion, her husband was found shot in the head, dead. She told my brothers and sister that I had killed their father. This guilt stayed with me for years, till God set me free. This started her on the road to becoming an abusive alcoholic. I was abused once again, put on the streets by the time I was 17, put into another institution, Juvenile Home, and ended up in a hospital with a nervous breakdown.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>By the time I was twenty-six, I had been married twice and had three babies. The first one was born with brain damage. Since I was not educated, I worked as a waitress in a restaurant at night. I began to associate with the wrong crowd. Drinking and medical drugs took charge of my life. Before long I became a bar waitress and a dancer because the pay was better. Instead of my life getting better, it became worse.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>About this time, the American Government discovered that I was not an American Citizen, and wanted to send me back to England. My children would have to stay in America because they were American Citizens by birth. It was during this time my real mother renewed contact with me and I found out she was trying to find my real father in order to keep me in America. He was an American. Their romance had started during the war, while he was stationed in England. (Read the book, Cry Within)</em></p><p> </p><p><em>My real father and I met for the first time in the late 1960s. I then moved to Texas, where he and his wife lived with no children.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>I didnt realize until 1975 how much God truly loved me, when I met my grandmother, my fathers mother, for the first time. She gave me a book called The New Testament. On the inside of the cover, she wrote, To my grand-daughter. Read a chapter a day and your life will get better. Since then, God not only made Himself real to me, but He also allowed me to reunite with my whole family. He then sent me a Christian husband and father for my children. We were married for twenty years and both worked in the Ministry. Because the trials were so sever spiritually, emotionally, and financially, my husband abandoned me about one month before our 20th anniversary. Our last two years ended up with bad reports of health, mental and physical, in our families. Even in my own life, I had several different doctors say I had a tumor blockage in the cervic area. Some reported cancer because of the way it affected my body. It was during this time that I had a death experience. While I was in church praising the Lord in 1998, I was carried out of the church lifeless. God raised me up from death to life, not only in the spiritual sense, but also in the natural. God performed, not only one, but many miracles for me. This is not a closure of my life, but an opportunity.</em></p><p> </p><p><em>Our disappointments are His appointments in our lives. He is my maker, husband, lawyer, councelor and my great physician, Isaiah 54:4,8,17.</em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Darrin, post: 64047546, member: 336858"] November 11, 2011 [I]O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure. [/I] [I]Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed. [/I] [I]My soul is also sore vexed: but thou, O LORD, how long? [/I] [I]Return, O LORD, deliver my soul: oh save me for thy mercies' sake. [/I] [I]For in death there is no remembrance of thee: in the grave who shall give thee thanks? [/I] [I]I am weary with my groaning; all the night make I my bed to swim; I water my couch with my tears. [/I] [I]Mine eye is consumed because of grief; it waxeth old because of all mine enemies. [/I] [I]Depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity; for the LORD hath heard the voice of my weeping. [/I] [I]The LORD hath heard my supplication; the LORD will receive my prayer. (Psalms 6:1-9)[/I] Sometimes, I want to write and the words just wont come. I copied this psalm of David, and was going to add my own prayer. I guess some prayers are between us and God, because every thing I tried to write went nowhere and was deleted. I didnt delete the psalm because its my favorite, and it says so much. November 15, 2011 We received mail today from Angela Grauke. She sent three pamphlets. [CENTER][I][SIZE=4]Trust in the Lord[/SIZE][/I][/CENTER] [CENTER][I]This is the love that sought us,[/I] [I]This is the love that brought us[/I] [I]From the darkness[/I] [I]To the joys of life.[/I][/CENTER] [I] As He gave His life[/I] [CENTER][I]out of love for us,[/I] [I]may we live each day [/I] [I]out of love for Him[/I][/CENTER] [I]Sometimes it seems as though life doesnt make sense. Circumstances and situations cause us to wonder about Gods love for us.[/I] [CENTER][I]My Testimony[/I][/CENTER] [I]Abandoned at the age of ten months, by my grandfather because I was an illegitimate child, I was institutionalized for the first seventeen years of my life.[/I] [I]At this time, we orphans were told that we belonged to the English Government. Since there was an over population of orphans in England after World War II, The English Government decided to ship a bunch of us off to other parts of the world. The group I was in was shipped to Sydney, Australia. This was my first chance to see the outside world. The world beyond the walls.[/I] [I]We were on the ship with other children from other parts of England for six long weeks. When we arrived in Australia, the children were lined up, separated, and transported to different institutions.[/I] [I]I remember being physically and sexually abused before I was twelve years old. I was hospitalized for a while, then sent to another much larger and different institution.[/I] [I]By the time I was fifteen years old, my real mother found out that I was still living, after her father confessed what he did prior to 16 years ago. She now lived in America and had a family. She wanted to have me with her. She made arrangements and I was in the states within one year after receiving my first letter from her. One week after our reunion, her husband was found shot in the head, dead. She told my brothers and sister that I had killed their father. This guilt stayed with me for years, till God set me free. This started her on the road to becoming an abusive alcoholic. I was abused once again, put on the streets by the time I was 17, put into another institution, Juvenile Home, and ended up in a hospital with a nervous breakdown.[/I] [I]By the time I was twenty-six, I had been married twice and had three babies. The first one was born with brain damage. Since I was not educated, I worked as a waitress in a restaurant at night. I began to associate with the wrong crowd. Drinking and medical drugs took charge of my life. Before long I became a bar waitress and a dancer because the pay was better. Instead of my life getting better, it became worse.[/I] [I]About this time, the American Government discovered that I was not an American Citizen, and wanted to send me back to England. My children would have to stay in America because they were American Citizens by birth. It was during this time my real mother renewed contact with me and I found out she was trying to find my real father in order to keep me in America. He was an American. Their romance had started during the war, while he was stationed in England. (Read the book, Cry Within)[/I] [I]My real father and I met for the first time in the late 1960s. I then moved to Texas, where he and his wife lived with no children.[/I] [I]I didnt realize until 1975 how much God truly loved me, when I met my grandmother, my fathers mother, for the first time. She gave me a book called The New Testament. On the inside of the cover, she wrote, To my grand-daughter. Read a chapter a day and your life will get better. Since then, God not only made Himself real to me, but He also allowed me to reunite with my whole family. He then sent me a Christian husband and father for my children. We were married for twenty years and both worked in the Ministry. Because the trials were so sever spiritually, emotionally, and financially, my husband abandoned me about one month before our 20th anniversary. Our last two years ended up with bad reports of health, mental and physical, in our families. Even in my own life, I had several different doctors say I had a tumor blockage in the cervic area. Some reported cancer because of the way it affected my body. It was during this time that I had a death experience. While I was in church praising the Lord in 1998, I was carried out of the church lifeless. God raised me up from death to life, not only in the spiritual sense, but also in the natural. God performed, not only one, but many miracles for me. This is not a closure of my life, but an opportunity.[/I] [I]Our disappointments are His appointments in our lives. He is my maker, husband, lawyer, councelor and my great physician, Isaiah 54:4,8,17.[/I] [/QUOTE]
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