Hi MrStace:
First, know that many of us are praying for you, that you may know the depth of the Love the Father has for you in Christ; for He would not have any of us remain in darkness, but truly desires that we be set free from the deception and bondage of the enemy and live in the Light of His Son, Jesus.
There was a time in my life when I did not think God liked me very much, when my whole life seemed to go from misery to misery. Yet, I believed; I knew the Bible very well; and I knew there was a love in me for Him. But I could never seem to get close to Him, and never really saw any specific answers to my prayers. I always felt as if I was following Jesus from way back in the crowd; as if I was climbing hills, only to catch a glimpse of Him going over another hill far in front of me. Finally, I just got fed up and told Him, "Lord. I don't care if You like me or not! I am still going to love You!" And right then, I made up my mind to know Him personally.
So what I would like to offer you are some practical steps that He led me to take (although at the time, I did not realize it was Him leading me) that He used to grow me and teach me and help me find Him. And what a difference this has made in my own prayer life.
1) Guard your tongue. Become aware of what you say out loud, for your words can rob you of any blessings He has for you. No matter how you feel, how depressed you get, etc., don't allow yourself to start speaking from those feelings. There are a multitude of scripture in the both the OT and NT which teach this.
2) Praise God. This truly helps in guarding the words of your mouth as well as overcoming negative feelings. You don't have to try to conjure up reasons for praising Him for the situation, just make up your mind to praise Him in the situation. He lead me (and I still do this at times when necessary) to say out loud: "I praise you Father that I am not moved by my feelings, but only by your Word. I praise you Father that I am not moved by what others say about me, but only by your Word." And so on. Truly, praise works!
3) Get His Word from your mind to your spirit. Two ways to help with this are (a) to never read the Bible without praying first, asking the Holy Spirit to guide you in it; to open your heart to receive what He is teaching you; to open your understanding to grasp it. Etc. And (b) go through the NT finding every passage where it talks about who we are in Christ and who He is in us. In other words, everything positive that applies to us being new creatures in Him. Make a tape recording of your own voice saying these passages, applying them to yourself. Our spirits pay attention to what we say, and since it is with our hearts that we believe - not our minds - by saying His Word aloud we can re-program our inner man according to that Word. Example: "I am the Righteousness of God in Christ." Then, play that tape! I would put on headphones at night and play it as I went to sleep, night after night for weeks.
4) Don't try to believe for more than you have faith to believe. Faith is like a muscle; it must be exercised in order to grow. Just as you would not begin lifting weights with the maximum amount - the goal you want to reach - until you built up to it, so don't try to believe too far beyond what you know you can believe for. Judging this is tricky, I agree. But you have to start somewhere and I believe the Lord will guide you. Many, many times I have wanted to believe, but had to admit I really did not have that big of faith. Don't set yourself up to fail; but don't set your sights too low either. Exercise your faith and it will grow, until you can believe for big miracles.
5) Make it your primary goal to know Christ Jesus. More than anything else, seek to know the Giver rather than the gift. Humble yourself - in your attitude especially - before Him and trust Him to guide you. Remember that love is not a feeling, rather love causes feelings. We know He loves us - just like we know anyone loves us - because He says He does. His love for us is not dependent upon our feelings about it, anymore than our parents love for us was dependent upon our feelings. Realizing this is extremely important in our being able to trust Him, for our trust - our faith - is very much dependent upon our knowing and believing in His love for us in Christ. And we know He loves us because His Word says He does, and God does not lie.
6) Remember we have an enemy and he is a liar! Daniel prayed and even though the Lord heard his prayer the first day, it took 21 days for the answer to come. Pray, believe (because of His Word) that in the Name of Jesus we can be sure that the Father hears and answers our prayers, and then persevere in thanking Him for answering our prayer. The enemy delights in robbing of us of our joy, faith, confidence, peace, etc., as well as the answers to our prayers. Stay the course!
7) Practice listening. Set some time (20-30 minutes) aside each day to sit quietly before the Lord. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. Get a notebook and write what you hear inside. Don't worry about getting big revelations - because you probably won't; and don't worry if you don't get anything - because you may not for awhile. Consider it as you would any conversation: both sides talk in a conversation, not just one. So you are allowing the Lord His opportunity to speak to you and not you just talking to Him. And write down what comes to you. And even when you do begin to hear from Him, don't expect some earth-shattering revelations. For a long time the Lord had me practice this, just to learn how to hear Him no matter what was going on around me. And I am still learning. But measure everything you hear against His Word! And seek to be obedient to what He tells you. It is when we are faithful on the little things that He will trust us with bigger things.
8) Seek His will first and always. The Lord will never get in line with us; we must always get in line with Him. In all your prayers - for others as well as for yourself, seek His will.
Just know this in your heart and mind and spirit, dear brother: God loves you! The Father does, because you believe in His Son; the Lord Jesus does, for He willing gave His soul up just for you; the Holy Spirit does, because He dwells within you, and Jesus sent Him to guide you in His love.
I pray this helps, although I realize I cannot write everything down here. But no matter what don't give up! Keep seeking Him. Strive to enter into Christ through that narrow door, for it will take everything - and being willing to lose everything - in order to find Him. Have the attitude of Paul in counting everything in your life as poop when compared to being found in Him. Knowing Jesus is truly worth all that we have, all that we are. He is the answer to all our prayers.
LeastOne
