finances in biblical order?

[EM20]

I want to do God's will. Including putting my biblical finances in order. What exactly does that mean though? I know tithing is 10% but is that of every paycheck or yearly salary? What do you do if you're a stay at home mom whose husband works and doesn't believe in tithing? Do you tithe his income anyways and make him angry?

 

[Soul2Soul]

I want to do God's will. Including putting my biblical finances in order. What exactly does that mean though? I know tithing is 10% but is that of every paycheck or yearly salary? What do you do if you're a stay at home mom whose husband works and doesn't believe in tithing? Do you tithe his income anyways and make him angry?

As I understand things tithing is not specifically dealt with in the New Testament although the issue of financial giving was - eg to help fellow workers and the poor (including disciples!). I believe the idea of giving 10% of one's income may not be biblically justified... but financial giving is. Although, in our church we do give financially but we are given the freedom to judge how much each of us can afford to contribute. It is about having a spiritual, emotional, thoughtful and financial perspective on giving - so some may be willingly able to give 10% or more whilst others may give 2 or 3%. I do believe that each member should give some amount willingly and in faith as the bible teaches but various churches and their leaders have differing thoughts on this. We give weekly - again this may vary with other churches - if you can't afford to give I believe that God knows your desire to do so but I am convinced that you should not involve your husbands finances without his approval ...

 

[St_Worm2]

What do you do if you're a stay at home mom whose husband works and doesn't believe in tithing? Do you tithe his income anyways and make him angry?

God owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Psalm 50), so He doesn't need your tithe, personally. Giving is therefore not meant to benefit Him, God uses it as a benefit to us ..

Is it a necessity that we do so .. Take a look at the closing Scripture below and decide for yourself ..

As for "angry" giving, the NT is clear about that (see the verses just below), so you'll need to find another way rather than giving behind his back. Sadly, this is a problem for many marriages, mine included, so you'll have to join the rest of us in praying fo him and helping him to understand how absolutely important giving is ... for him! Hopefully, for now anyway, you'll be able agree upon some amount to tithe.

"He who sows sparingly shall also reap sparingly; and he who sows bountifully shall also reap bountifully. Let each one do just as he has purposed in his heart; not grudgingly or under compulsion; for God loves a cheerful giver." 2 Corinthians 9:6-7
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Praying for you!

Yours and His,
David

"Sell your possessions and give to charity; make yourselves purses which do not wear out,
an unfailing treasure in heaven, where no thief comes near, nor moth destroys.
For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."
Luke 12:33-34​

 

[St_Worm2]

Hi again EM20, I should have recommended that you first consider what St. Peter teaches us in 1 Peter 3:1-2 and St. Paul in Ephesians 5:22-33. Though I believe the verses in 1 Peter 3 are meant first and foremost to help a believing wife who is married to an unbelieving husband, I think what is taught there could be applied in this case.

If you are a new or fairly new Christian (and I assume you are since you're posting on this forum), you might want to solicit help from someone you respect in your church, perhaps a woman you hold in high regard spiritually, about how to apply or best go about doing what the Lord teaches you from the passages I mentioned above.

Yours and His,
David
p.s. - I am unable to link you to the above mentioned Scripture verses online, so I will post them here instead.

In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 1 Peter 3:1-2
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22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.
24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.
28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;
29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,
30 because we are members of His body.
31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.
32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:22-33
​

 

[ALEA40]

I'm in the same boat as a SAHM with a non-believer husband. Since being a part of the church is a big part of our lives, my husband didn't have a problem with giving $20 per week. I've since upped our giving in $5 increments slowly over time until we got to a point were we started to feel stretched. My husband is not pleased but we're now giving $40 per week which is still no where near 10% of our income (either before or after taxes). I also started volunteering at our church which helps to fill the gap. We would would have to sell our house and buy a smaller one to reach a 10% giving goal. It might be possible in the future, but it's not realistic right now.

I kind of just use the 10% as a general goal. If I cut our income in half (my half since I AM doing a job at home as a mom, cook, chauffeur, accountant, shopper, planner, etc., I start to approach that 10% goal. I've done a lot of reading about tithing on the internet and can see how it can be misused and how it's not really appropriate for today. Letusreason.org has a really good overview of tithing. They say "Tithing for Israel is not the same as the tithe that we hear of today-- in fact tithing was rarely money. There were three tithes in the Old Covenant. More often tithes were the crops, the produce of the soil was to be tithed, grains, the fruit of the trees, every year new wine and oil, the firstborn of their herds and flocks (Leviticus 27:30-33). If the place the nation of Israel were to tithe and was too far away to carry their goods (such as Jerusalem), it could be exchanged for money. They were to use their money to buy anything the owner chose: cattle, sheep, wine (Deuteronomy 14:22-26). Every third year the tithe was to be reserved as a festival tithe where they brought out all the tithes, and their produce where the Levite, the stranger, the orphan, the widow, the poor who were in their town, could come and eat and be content (Deuteronomy 14:28-29; 26:12-15). You can expect not to see those who teach tithing as an obligation to practice the third year tithe."

There are no such legalistic rules in the NT. Paul says in 2 Corinthians 9:7 "You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don't give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves a person who gives cheerfully." If it starts to bring pain and discontent in your home, then it is no longer cheerful. I encourage you to do more research on the topic.

There is a huge church in our city with 30K members bringing in $400,000 a week in collections. I think their operating expenses are only about 30% of this. Our normal-sized church (600 to 800 members) is barely bringing in $10,000 per week- which covers only about 60% of the overhead expenses. Churches have a lot of expenses today including mortgages, maintenance, salaries, health insurance for employees, utilities, equipment, projects, youth programs, etc. As a result, we haven't been able to replace employees as they have left. We're now down to about 2 full-time and 3 part-time employees. At this rate I don't know how long our church will survive

I think it's important to look at all the facts and do what's best for your family.

 

[AWorkInProgress]

I want to do God's will. Including putting my biblical finances in order. What exactly does that mean though? I know tithing is 10% but is that of every paycheck or yearly salary? What do you do if you're a stay at home mom whose husband works and doesn't believe in tithing? Do you tithe his income anyways and make him angry?

Is your husband saved? Or does he just not believe in the tithing principles?

 

[Sketcher]

I want to do God's will. Including putting my biblical finances in order. What exactly does that mean though? I know tithing is 10% but is that of every paycheck or yearly salary? What do you do if you're a stay at home mom whose husband works and doesn't believe in tithing? Do you tithe his income anyways and make him angry?

Tithing would be 10%, first check you write after getting your paycheck. If your husband is the one bringing in all the money, don't give behind his back. Rather, negotiate with him into giving something for a few months, and see if the two of you are coming out ahead or behind. Remember to be respectful and submissive. Listen to his concerns. (Ephesians 5:22-33, 1 Peter 3:1-7)

If the two of you are in debt, give priority to paying it off. (Proverbs 22:7)

Save something. (Proverbs 6:6-8) Scripture doesn't really give us a detailed model for how much to save, but there are some good ones out there such as $1,000 for an emergency fund to start, and 6 months worth of expenses in your emergency fund once your debt is paid. It may need to be larger given the state of the economy these days.

Be open-handed, and do not hoard. (Luke 12:15-20, Proverbs 28:8,22) Be wise in who you give it to of course, and you also need to be on the same page with your husband as far as how much to give, the circumstances, and so forth. Don't be surprised though, if the Holy Spirit tells you to give to someone in need.

 

[parsley]

The New Testament was built upon the Old. Jesus and His disciples were practicing Jews. He had Passover dinner, debated with religious leaders in the temple, taught in the synagogue... He did not need to teach Jews how to be Jewish because they already were.

Instead, Jesus challenged people --including the leaders -- to get back to the heart of the law after many years of building up too much religious clutter above the basic simple instructions. He broke the Sabbath rules by picking grain to eat -- but He did not really break God's original rules, because it was man that determined that breaking a handful of seeds off a stem was considered work.

Jesus didn't tell us to stop tithing. Give to Caesar that which is Caesar's; give to God that which is God's. But as KEA44 brought out, the tithe was the first wave of crops produced for the season -- not initially money.

The grain went into the storehouse that was managed by the priests, to dole out portions for the widows, orphans, visitors, underemployed.... it made sure that those who needed to eat, could eat. The priest's families also ate the donations, but they did not hoard it or own it. The grain belonged to the community, and the priests distributed it.

And yes there were donations given to support the work of the priests. But the priests were doing the work of doctors, psychologists, teachers, facilities managers, butchers, lawyers, health code inspectors.... they served the community in many ways.

God owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Psalm 50), so He doesn't need your tithe, personally. Giving is therefore not meant to benefit Him, God uses it as a benefit to us ..

There is a benefit to us to put God first and trust Him; to see everything we have as originally His (and the whole planet); to lower our anxiety of storing up more than we need, and start giving away toward actual current needs; to create a networked community that cares for those in need.

It creates a lifestyle that is generous and good and kind. It honors God when we are not clinging to our money so tightly. It does not honor God when preachers flaunt their belongings in front of donors who gave sacrificially.

The issue is between you and God. Some people have prayed about it and felt they should donate time -- since time is their valued commodity. Or skills, offering pro bono work before starting a project. Or giving away extra belongings to Salvation Army, or volunteering more.

If you take the original tithe instructions literally, then the first visible products of your efforts toward profit -- those belong to the Lord. Maybe that could even be interpreted as offering the first hour of babysitting free to a parent who is struggling. I don't want to mislead anyone, but think it's worth exploring possible parallels to giving grain.

It's God that you are accountable to, so ask Him what would be acceptable to Him. As you say, the tithe went to the poor and you are in a needy situation. The tithe also went toward creating a place for God's presence to be known among nations. Some of the offerings were eaten by the people giving them -- but the act of giving was important.

 

[parsley]

This isn't specifically on tithing, but it's an encouraging example of working with God on our finances.

Kingdom of God Buffet - Laugh & Learn, God says "You have ALL Things for Life" - YouTube

 

[parsley]

There are some good Q&A tips on different posts of this page:

http://www.rabbidaniellapin.com/ask_rabbi.php#2051

 

[Peripatetic]

For me, the biggest secret to financial contentment and biblical priority was changing my perspective from owning my money to being a steward of money that I consider to not be mine. As a "money manager", I don't get as upset when unexpected bills come or when rates go up. It also means that I don't obsess so much about a % tithe. I give to the church every week, but the majority of my charitable giving is at the end of the year. That way, I just adjust up or down based on the unexpected expenses or income that went our or came in. Takes the emotion and instability out of it.

However, that only works if you can eliminate bad debt. I agree with Sketcher who suggested that priority should be given paying it off debt - especially credit cards. If you can get to where you just have a mortgage and maybe car payments, giving to the church and to worthwhile charities becomes much more practical and joyful.

 

[parsley]

For me, the biggest secret to financial contentment and biblical priority was changing my perspective from owning my money to being a steward of money that I consider to not be mine. As a "money manager", I don't get as upset when unexpected bills come or when rates go up.

That is such a big part of tithing -- coordinating/stewarding, working with God on this, and letting Him come through. Our home is in Heaven, and this is just a temporary stay.

Having kids, there were times we made decisions to make less income so the kids had better care; but then God provided for small needs in amazing ways, and we found ourselves improving in stability and quality of life. It wasn't that we finally reached a point we no longer needed to depend on Him, which I think is often our tendency. But He made sure we were provided for.

With your home situation, it looks you like think of it not so much cowering under the breadwinner's ability to make money while you watch the kids, but that half of the money is his. Which is fair. A certain amount of respect is needed for using half-his money, in a similar way that we use our money that is half-God's.

If we see our money as God's, we are less likely to stop for the $2 convenience store soda or the $4 coffee... fewer movies at full price, fewer "I need this for myself" impulse purchases. Craft projects, new books, fancy recipe ingredients, jewelry and clothes... even if you don't spend anything on yourself, the inclination can still be there, to define oneself by surrounding yourself with visible objects that are "you."

We compete with others by showing that we can look more impressive. But if we try to shift our minds toward being God-centered, then the peacock feathers are unnecessary and we save a little money mysteriously.

The marriage situation that you might feel is binding you unexpectedly (or not), could serve as good training for less self-expression and social competition in spending. You need some self-expression of course, but should at least see it for what it is during this tighter time.

No guilt for missing the thousand-dollar strollers. (-;

 

[parsley]

I know I've already posted so much, but wanted to address more on the SAHM situation. It can be very distressing to lose spending power, respect, flexibility when you give up working. Sometimes the man sees it as slightly unfair but still what he wants -- and couples get into habits of the men making large purchases, while the women assert themselves little by little with small purchases.

It can put a big strain on the marriage and make the woman feel trapped after several years. So prepare for how you might handle that as a couple. It is hard to prevent it, so you might as well look at it squarely now.

That might mean agreeing on separate accounts where you don't need to scrutinize each others' purchases. (With one joint household one for repairs and appliances.)

Your question was about tithing, but if you separate your budgets, then it doesn't matter as much until tax time. It would be your money to spend. Since you can claim deductions for charitable contributions, it can help you a little at the end of the year. (Clothing donations are also tax-deductible.)