Fear I can never be saved

[oblique]

Hello everyone,

I have been very distressed these past few days. I need some guidence and assurance that all is not hopeless.

My name is Tim, and I am grateful to be a Christian, something which has turned my life upside down within the past yr I have learned so much about God and his plans for me. I really want to make him the centre of my life. Recently I have become involved with a church community, and helping with the church music team.

About a month ago, i did something stupid. Im a moment of passion, in the context of trying to make myself follow God;s path, I promised him I would give up some bad habits. I have tried to do this before, and failed.

I swore upon God's name and heaven that if I ever did this again that I would forfeit my life and everything I stand for, and my soul.

I really repent of this... I thought I was on track but I now realise from reading in Matthew a few days ago how stupid it was:

I refer to the following:

>>>

"You have heard that it was said to our people long ago, 'Don't break your promises, but keep the promises you make to the Lord.' 34 But I tell you, never swear an oath.
Don't swear an oath
using the name of heaven, because heaven is God's throne.

35 Don't swear an oath using the name
of the earth, because the earth belongs to God. Don't swear an oath using the name of Jerusalem, because that is the city of the great King. 36 Don't even swear by your own head, because you cannot make one hair on your head become white or black. 37 Say only yes if you mean yes, and no if you mean no. If you say more than yes or no, it is from the Evil One.

- Matthew 5:27-37 (NCV


Numbers 30:1 And Moses spake unto the heads of the tribes concerning the children of Israel, saying, This is the thing which the LORD hath commanded.
2 If a man vow a vow unto the LORD, or
swear an oath to bind his soul with a bond; he shall not break his word, he shall do according to all that proceedeth out of his mouth.

>>>

Now I am afraid... because I have created a logical paradox.

I swore in God's name that my life and soul would be foreit. I did not keep my promise to him. Now God and everything he stands for has been bound (in name) to the integrity of the enforcement of this vow. I broke the condition of my making, and therefore I fear God could not forgive me even if he wanted to, because he would have to deny the power of His name to do it.

this is something God cannot do.


I do not EVEN KNOW what forfeit really means and how God interprets it.

I worry therefore I have renounced my eternal life and can never get it back. I have never cried so much in my life, or repented as much.

I know Jesus died for my sins and was raised, but I worry that I have no control to reach resolution to this problem: if My life is forfeit does God forfeit it or do I have to do that? Does this refer to eternal life? Will he have a nasty surprise waiting for me as a result of this? Is he obliged to keep the conditions of my stupid oath? I will not turn away from God.

This has been the greatest attack on my faith I can remember. I have felt despair and chaos over this. My feeligns are all over the place and I have had difficulty sleeping.

I want to tell you I have a lot of christian support in my Family... I have spoken to my Dad about this, and he has been very reassuring. But I can't get my head aroudn the chaos. I am so tired. He suggested I should tak to some other christians about this.

Does any of this make sense?

Tim

 

[Trench777]

Hey there, Tim.

I think I might be able to help you, friend.

You spoke words (I do not for a moment deny the importance or power of words). However, the words you spoke were, in this case, meaningless. Why do I say that?

Well, lets put it like this...suppose I made a deal with you. If I EVER ate a jelly donut again, I'll give you the Sears Tower. I SWEAR, I'll give it to you, if I ever eat a jelly donut.

Then I eat a jelly donut ('cause let's face it, I'm a sucker for a jelly donut)

Now, you come looking for me to pay up. Umm...well, theres a little problem here. The little problem is...I don't OWN the Sears Tower. Oops!

You see, the "deal" was invalid before it was even uttered.

The same applies to your "oath". YOU are not your own, brother. You can't bargain yourself in a deal...you are purchased (at a VERY dear price, I might add). Bought & paid for with the Blood of The Lamb. You can't bargain with something you don't own.

Reference: 1COR 6:19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of G-d, and ye are not your own?

ACTS 20:28 Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of G-d, which he hath purchased with his own blood.

G-d owns you. Lock, stock & barrel. You can not legitimately offer yourself in a bargain, deal, oath or otherwise...any more than I can barter the Sears Tower.

Hope that helps.

May His Word be a light to our path and a lamp to our feet!

T777

 

[all47154]

Hi, I am here to tell you that you can be saved continue to seek the truth don't for one moment believe you can't be saved that is one of satan's greatest tricks along with many you made a deal with God not know the scripts your learning and in doing so you will learn a lot more every evil heart can be save Just call upon his name in good faith and believe he paid the price for our sin and Ask the lord to forgive you we all make mistakes some small some big but in Chirst we are all the same we are flesh and blood we are not God and we will stumble along the way but he will lift us up and put us back on that path of rightousness thats a blessed thing because that is how we grow in Christ and continue to learn He Loves us so much that he will forgive us Ephesians 6:12-20 Satan will use anything to tell us God will forsake us but scripter tells us He Will Never Forsake Us the more you come to Know The Lord our savor the more your eyes will be open to the truth Amen in This I will pray for you and may the good Lord Bless and Keep you

 

[Techbot]

good words Trench

Your soul and your life is not your own anymore to bargain with Oblique. God knows that you are human and that you will mess up. Ask His forgiveness, accept it and move on. I'm learning this lesson myself

 

[oblique]

THankyou all so much,

The Lord is answering my prayers. He has not turned his back on me! I am learning new things, and relearning old things. God has been using this experience to make my faith stronger.. to drive me to seek more knowledge of the scripture, and of his promises. I pray Jesus will soften my heart and live there day and night for ever.

The bible says "hold on to the faithfulness of God"... dad tells me even when we falter HE will *not* lose faith in us. He will not snuff out the smoultering wick, or break the bent reed.

Satan, I have learned, means "accuser"... He is continuing to attack me and confuse me, make me feel guilty, but I am beginning to realise that bno matter what the enemy says, he cannot Cheat me or any of his children out of something that the Lord gives freely.

The Lord Keeps his promises.

My feeliugns feel chaotic, but I hold onto the words of Jesus himself

"Most assuredely I say to you, he who hears my word, and believe in Him who sent me has everlasting life,, and shall not come into judgement, but has passed from death into life." john 5:24

Thankyou for your prayers. This is the biggest deception in my faith I am enduring. Dad says he rejoyces that I am under attack, because it means I am on the right path.

God bless you all.

Tim

PS I have noticed many people type G-d and not "God"

I am new to this forum and I don't want to offend anyone.

 

[Stormy]

My feeliugns feel chaotic, but I hold onto the words of Jesus himself

Reach for Jesus and know his love and peace. You will be fine.

Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

 

[Trench777]

Glad you're feeling better, man. Satan is the accuser, day & night, of the brethren...you do well to submit to G-d, resist the devil & watch him flee from you.

Don't sweat offending anyone (well, me at least) I write G-d without vowels as a personal form of reverence to my Lord and am not offended in the slightest by those who revere Him in thier own ways.

Be blessed!

T777