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Exceedingly, Abundantly, Above All...!

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youthwalk

youthwalk

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This is Something I wrote a couple months after I was diagnosed as bipolarII. My faith was weak, I couldn't see how God could be present in this situation. I know now that God was with me. He's with me now and though I still struggle with minor swings, I believe that I've recieved and am still recieving breakthroughs. I will be healed by the blood of Jesus. By His stripes I AM healed! His word states that He can do EXCEEDINGLY, ABUNDANTLY, ABOVE ALL I COULD EVER ASK OR IMAGINE...GOd can fulfill my WILDEST DREAMS!!!:clap: I can believe that I'm cured, I pray to be cured...I will be cured.




What am I trying to say? What do I desperately want?
I'm broken now. I'm saddened now. I'm tired and faithless now. Why did this happen to me? Why? What did I do wrong to deserve this?

This can go one of two ways: I can struggle, put up a valiant fight and maybe I'll live a comfortable life...maybe someone will want to be with me, maybe I'll get married, maybe I'll have children. Maybe I won't die alone and lost. Or it can go the other way: I could give up now. Stop wanting to be happy later on. SLB gave up. Most others won't even try. I'm tired. I want to stop. I could stop taking my meds, live like I never knew that anything was wrong. I'll have a degree of happiness...a level. Not wholesome, complete happiness but it'll be enough once I don't let anyone in. Once I stay isolated I can survive this outcome.

I wonder sometimes if God actually wanted me to be happy. I don't blame Him. I'm assured that once I trust Him it'll be ok. But why give me all this to deal with. What purpose does this serve?

This crisis is over...well, not completely but it's getting there. But bipolar was a complication...it messed this up. Reared it's ugly head. Now I have more to deal with.

I can't believe that it's a life long illness. I only 20. That's not fair. What will I get out of this life with an illness like this?
Click to expand...


He is able
More than able
To accomplish what concerns me today

He is able
More than able
To handle anything that comes my way

He is able
More than able
To do much more than I could ever dream

He is able
God is able
To make me what He wants me to be... :amen:
 
A

alaurie

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Hi youthwalk. Beautiful poem! I hope your prayers are answered, if this is God's will for you. :) Please realize if they're not, though, that trust and faith in the Lord in the midst of your struggles can grow your relationship with Him wonderfully, regardless of whether the struggles end in miraculous healing or last a lifetime. One day, though, we'll be in His presence and there will be no more sickness.

Have your progress monitored by a psychiatrist and objective Christians close to you since the mania/hypomania side of bipolar can cause feelings of elation and skewed religious thinking. I think the enemy loves to twart the treatment of bipolar Christians by having them self pronouce a "cure" or "healing" when it's actually their very illness causing them to believe in a false healing that eventually results in their spiraling down and landing pretty hard.
 
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youthwalk said:
This is Something I wrote a couple months after I was diagnosed as bipolarII. My faith was weak, I couldn't see how God could be present in this situation. I know now that God was with me. He's with me now and though I still struggle with minor swings, I believe that I've recieved and am still recieving breakthroughs. I will be healed by the blood of Jesus. By His stripes I AM healed! His word states that He can do EXCEEDINGLY, ABUNDANTLY, ABOVE ALL I COULD EVER ASK OR IMAGINE...GOd can fulfill my WILDEST DREAMS!!!:clap: I can believe that I'm cured, I pray to be cured...I will be cured.







He is able
More than able
To accomplish what concerns me today

He is able
More than able
To handle anything that comes my way

He is able
More than able
To do much more than I could ever dream

He is able
God is able
To make me what He wants me to be... :amen:
Click to expand...
May the Lord richly bless you! Faye
 
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