Duh

[Janet842]

I have had a pretty miserable life. Mentally ill (healed for around 20 years now), many, many trials and tribulations... and the latest round has shown me that I am a failure at everything - my job, family relationships, and even (in some ways) in my relationship with God.

I have come to realize that a great deal of my motivation for trying to please God comes out of pain avoidance. I'm always trying to do everything that I can to avoid more pain - to avoid having to be corrected and disciplined by God. But what is the result of that? -- It means that rather than being focused on devotion to God I have been focused on me. I have been trying to control my life and that life has been about me. So today the decisions as to whether I suffer or not, and whether I am blessed or not, I am putting in God's hands.

 

[aiki]

I have had a pretty miserable life. Mentally ill (healed for around 20 years now), many, many trials and tribulations... and the latest round has shown me that I am a failure at everything - my job, family relationships, and even (in some ways) in my relationship with God.

Realizing you are a failure at everything is not necessarily a bad thing. Christ is pretty blunt about our utter weakness:

John 15:5
5 I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.

Its only when we see our deep need of God, when we see just how desperately dependent on Him we must be, that we can begin to abide in Christ. And its only when we are abiding in Christ that we "bear fruit." So, seeing your failure is a good thing; for it may provoke you to a dependence upon God that isn't corrupted by Self-effort.

I have come to realize that a great deal of my motivation for trying to please God comes out of pain avoidance. I'm always trying to do everything that I can to avoid more pain - to avoid having to be corrected and disciplined by God.

There isn't anything else when God's love for us won't motivate us to obedience. Really, I'm not sure that God accepts our obedience when it isn't motivated by love. This seems to be what 1Corinthians 13 indicates:

1 Corinthians 13:1-3
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.
2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

But what is the result of that? -- It means that rather than being focused on devotion to God I have been focused on me. I have been trying to control my life and that life has been about me. So today the decisions as to whether I suffer or not, and whether I am blessed or not, I am putting in God's hands.

Matthew 11:28-30
28 Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

Selah.

 

[godisreal36]

It sounds like you're on the right path to me Jenet842. Sounds like the path i find myself on right now also. Faith is our shield and grace sustains us, i wouldn't worry too much, you're in good hands with the Lord.

Psalms 3 and 23 help me allot. Maybe other psalms would be more comforting also, those ones help me allot though. Hang in there sister all is well, it may not feel like it or even look like it now, but everything is good even when things are not so good. I feel for you and your suffering, i know it myself very well, God is able. Just keep praying.

All things work for our good when we keep saying that to ouselves.

keep saying that to yourself and you will soon beleive it and even see it.

Praising the Lord even when i don't feel like it helps me also.

 

[brinny]

I have had a pretty miserable life. Mentally ill (healed for around 20 years now), many, many trials and tribulations... and the latest round has shown me that I am a failure at everything - my job, family relationships, and even (in some ways) in my relationship with God.

I have come to realize that a great deal of my motivation for trying to please God comes out of pain avoidance. I'm always trying to do everything that I can to avoid more pain - to avoid having to be corrected and disciplined by God. But what is the result of that? -- It means that rather than being focused on devotion to God I have been focused on me. I have been trying to control my life and that life has been about me. So today the decisions as to whether I suffer or not, and whether I am blessed or not, I am putting in God's hands.

Boy, oh boy, can i relate to ev'rything you posted. So did Jabez.

I'm praying for ya, sister. Please pray for me too (((((hug))))

 

[Jeshu]

I have had a pretty miserable life. Mentally ill (healed for around 20 years now), many, many trials and tribulations... and the latest round has shown me that I am a failure at everything - my job, family relationships, and even (in some ways) in my relationship with God.

I have come to realize that a great deal of my motivation for trying to please God comes out of pain avoidance. I'm always trying to do everything that I can to avoid more pain - to avoid having to be corrected and disciplined by God. But what is the result of that? -- It means that rather than being focused on devotion to God I have been focused on me. I have been trying to control my life and that life has been about me. So today the decisions as to whether I suffer or not, and whether I am blessed or not, I am putting in God's hands.

That is an awesome insight and decision dear sister, which I have also seen and been forced to make. To let God's Spirit of loving truth lead you away from self to be with Jesus instead - back into the promised land. I found The Living Word to be very good at getting me through all that.

Indeed I found that suffering can bring us so much closer to God and is more honest about our weakest times, we need God so much more in time of want and pain and such is very useful.

I also found that to face the pain and to see what is causing the hurt is more useful trying to avoid hurting our sore spots within, for facing the pain will locate the trouble spot in The End and then we can treat our wounds, but avoiding the pain could end up with infections and prolonged healing from our inner issues.

The biggest advantage I found from being mentally ill is that I have been forced to rely on Jesus for everything, for I cannot trust myself to stay on top or meet my own standards, so faith in The Living Word proved to be The Way out of that trap.

Peace