The saying goes "Don't get someone whom you can live with, get someone whom you can't live without"
I need to hear your wisdom on the truth of this statement. Thanks!
I need to hear your wisdom on the truth of this statement. Thanks!
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CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
Don't get someone whom u can live with....
- Thread starter seangoh
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Gee, I'd say it's not covering the topic enough!
Too much need going back and forth means way too much dependance and not enough autonomy for the individual. And as for the "not someone you can live with" statement: yeah, it was a nice try to make the phrase catchy, but that IS the kind of person I'm looking for. Someone I can live a normal life with day to day... over and over again. In the same quarters... you know, living together. *laugh*
Too much need going back and forth means way too much dependance and not enough autonomy for the individual. And as for the "not someone you can live with" statement: yeah, it was a nice try to make the phrase catchy, but that IS the kind of person I'm looking for. Someone I can live a normal life with day to day... over and over again. In the same quarters... you know, living together. *laugh*
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I don't think there is such a thing as someone you can't live without, other than God. After all, every one of us here is living without anyone right now (considering that this is a singles' board so we're supposedly all single). Lots of people live their whole lives without someone. And plenty of people outlive their spouses, sometimes for many years.
Furthermore, what happens if you find someone who you can't live without, but they can live quite nicely without you?
Furthermore, what happens if you find someone who you can't live without, but they can live quite nicely without you?
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I think Fishstix is right. God is the only person you can't live without. But I think that they saying more pertains to the fact that we shouldn't settle for just anyone. We need to find a person that above and beyond "being able to live with." It should be someone that we don't want to imagine our lives without. Someone that makes our life better for being in it. Not someone, that... yeah, I guess I could live with them. So that's good enough for me.
But this is just my opinion.
But this is just my opinion.
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wvmtnkid
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I've heard it phrased "Just don't marry the person you can live with, marry the person you can't live without."
That made me think alot about settling. I realize I am older than most of you in here, and settling becomes a real issue once you reach a certain age. (I hope I'm not there yet!
) Anyway, it made me think about not just looking for someone that I could be happy with, but looking for God's best. There are probably a lot of men out there I could be happy living with (in marriage ) but they may not be the best one for me. I have met one or two that I thought I couldn't live without. And when things didn't work out, I can assure you that at times just the simple act of breathing seemed like a chore. But, God got me through. So, truly I guess there isn't anyone out there we can't live without. But, there are some that would make life more enjoyable. And hopefully, with God's help, our paths will cross and the rest will be history!
That made me think alot about settling. I realize I am older than most of you in here, and settling becomes a real issue once you reach a certain age. (I hope I'm not there yet!
) Anyway, it made me think about not just looking for someone that I could be happy with, but looking for God's best. There are probably a lot of men out there I could be happy living with (in marriage ) but they may not be the best one for me. I have met one or two that I thought I couldn't live without. And when things didn't work out, I can assure you that at times just the simple act of breathing seemed like a chore. But, God got me through. So, truly I guess there isn't anyone out there we can't live without. But, there are some that would make life more enjoyable. And hopefully, with God's help, our paths will cross and the rest will be history!
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the_man
" My heart is spoken for&
Yeah, I think the phrase is just saying don't settle, be picky. What it's not saying is that your life should so depend on someone else that they control whether you live or not. That's reading it too literally.wvmtnkid said:
If we were to go as far as to look into the origins of the phrase, I doubt it was a single person in a eureka moment of brilliance that coined it. It was probably a couple happily married for 30 years giving advice to a single person considering marriage that said it first. I would go as far to say that they most likely meant: "I can't imagine my life without my spouse; I wouldn't have it any other way. That is the perspective you should have when considering a mate."
/me shurgs shoulders
Makes sense to me.
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First of all, I'm new to this site. I came across it by accident, but I'm really glad I did.
I love this statement and I agree with it to an extent. I was married for 11 months and am just now "avoiding" my first real relationship. The man that I married I could definitely live without. And I do take that half of the saying literally, now. But, the other half is the one that gets everybody. Yes, God is the only one that I can't live without, but I don't want to live with the man that I will marry in the future. I don't think that makes much sense, but I don't know how else to say it.
Tracey
I love this statement and I agree with it to an extent. I was married for 11 months and am just now "avoiding" my first real relationship. The man that I married I could definitely live without. And I do take that half of the saying literally, now. But, the other half is the one that gets everybody. Yes, God is the only one that I can't live without, but I don't want to live with the man that I will marry in the future. I don't think that makes much sense, but I don't know how else to say it.
Tracey
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Tenorvoice
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The first person that I heard say this was Howard Hendricks. The point that he was trying to get across was the "God's choice for us is not someone with whom I can live with, it is someone that I can not live without." some of the other points that he said in this sermon that he gave was:
What could be worse that being unmarried............being married to the wrong person (not God's choice for us)
It is Harder for a Christian to get out of the will of God than most of us think IF YOU WANT IT , if you don't all you simply have to do is step out. and if you are in the center of His will for you and what He has planned for your life then you will not miss the preson that He has planned out for you.
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If you are looking for someone to fill and empty void in your life (heart) then you need not look to another human being for it, it will not be found. For as humans we are going to fail that other person at some point or time in that relationship (even without mening to)
You need to turn to God to fill that empty feeling in your life.
Phil 4:19 And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Only God can fill those voids that you may be having.
peace
What could be worse that being unmarried............being married to the wrong person (not God's choice for us)
It is Harder for a Christian to get out of the will of God than most of us think IF YOU WANT IT , if you don't all you simply have to do is step out. and if you are in the center of His will for you and what He has planned for your life then you will not miss the preson that He has planned out for you.
----
If you are looking for someone to fill and empty void in your life (heart) then you need not look to another human being for it, it will not be found. For as humans we are going to fail that other person at some point or time in that relationship (even without mening to)
You need to turn to God to fill that empty feeling in your life.
Phil 4:19 And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
Only God can fill those voids that you may be having.
peace
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TNSearch said:
Um... Then don't marry him.
Also, the lime green font is really hard to read. Could you maybe switch to a different color? Thanks.
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looksgood
Veteran
Ya know I thought about this statment. I think everyone is right in that it should not say "someone I cant live without" because there is NO ONE we can't live without.
BUT I think it should be reworded.
"Don't get someone whom you can live with, get someone whom you don't want to live without."
BUT I think it should be reworded.
"Don't get someone whom you can live with, get someone whom you don't want to live without."
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mina
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or how about " don't settle for someone you could JUST live with, hold out for that one person that it would make you crazy if you could imagine them not being in your life."
God is the only one that makes us complete, but he does send people to us that make us more blessed. And it's not wrong to want that.
God is the only one that makes us complete, but he does send people to us that make us more blessed. And it's not wrong to want that.
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