Do you think more single?

[MorkandMindy]

Do you think more now that you are single than when you were married?

Do you learn more now?

What do you attribute this to?

Should you think more?

Should you read more?

 

[MorkandMindy]

I've come across more useful insight into my life now that I'm single.


Time wouldn't seem to be more abundantly available now as I work full time and have children on the weekends and a lot in the school holidays as well, and the job of helping with homework is entirely mine too.

But what is crucial is the odd bits of unstructured time with no obligations. On Friday I got back from another hectic unappreciated day at work and just chilled. I was going to post in the Narcissism thread here but looked up more about it instead and came across schema and read a lot about that.

It was something I'd never heard of before so it was a first in my life, so was really exciting to read about. That is the value of having a few hours when you can do anything you want.

 

[blackribbon]

I don't think more now than when I was married-it is probably very similar...however, I don't have the person that grounded my thoughts since I don't have him to bounce things off of anymore...so I tend to obsess on them more.

I am better on the computer...but that is because I spend more time on the computer than I did when I was married...not necessarily a good thing.

I am in school again so I am learning more because of that...but the flip side is that I don't have the time to learn with my children as I homeschool them. They get more assignments now that I haven't actually been able to do more than skim.

My marriage was a good one. I believe I am mentally and intellectually less healthy than when I was married.

 

[dayhiker]

I've always taken some time to think about life in general and mine in particular a few mornings each week before I get out of bed. Also when ever I read anything, I think about how it applies to my life. So I've always thought a lot about my life and feel I know myself really really well.

So I know myself as well while I was married as I do now.

My issue has been how to communicate that to others. In general I don't have a lot of passion to tell others about who I am. Which means people night think they know me, but in reality they don't. But I am doing much better with that now.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

I definitely think more since I've been single, but that isn't necessarily a good thing.

Do I have more time? Yes and no....since my husband died and I mismanaged my finances I now work 2 jobs and take care of my teens. Luckily my teens don't need (or want) me around that much but I DO wish I had more time with them. Now when I have time, I don't have money, so I can't do much and with my son working and going to school I don't see him much. My other son is engulfed in computer online games or with friends so our time together is also limited.

Just typing this kind of makes me glad I don't have the added stress of worrying if some guy likes me enough or not and the energy it takes to put into a relationship. With 2 jobs it's tough sometimes to schedule my monthly "date" with my SIL and my weekly dinner with my cancer friend.

 

[renewed21]

Do you think more now that you are single than when you were married?

Do you learn more now?

What do you attribute this to?

No, No, having the life sucked out of me.

 

[MorkandMindy]

...

I am better on the computer...but that is because I spend more time on the computer than I did when I was married...not necessarily a good thing.

...

I've found some interesting ideas here on CF, but mainly the benefit is I research things before writing, often a lot, and think things a lot before writing as well.

I've always taken some time to think about life in general and mine in particular a few mornings each week before I get out of bed. ...

Exactly when most of my really big ideas arrive, though sometimes in the shower.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

my computer time is M-F 8-4:30 while I am at my day job. I don't compute when I'm not here. BTW my boss is completely aware of the time I spend on the internet. I have one of the best jobs in the world to be able to be on the computer without fear of losing my job or my boss finding out. I often wish I had some data entry job I could do while I was working to make even more money. Haven't found any yet...

 

[dayhiker]

That is a sweet job, Michelle. Sounds like a great boss.

OH, ya, ever find out the story about the check he wrote himself?

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

That is a sweet job, Michelle. Sounds like a great boss.

OH, ya, ever find out the story about the check he wrote himself?

nope, I guess he figured that I had figured it out so who knows maybe he thought he did tell me, IDK. But today....he had me write him a check for his "expenses" of 794.58! But he had me write it from our property management account. All I can think is, geez you just got 8 grand and now you need another 800? Must be nice! But he is the owner after all so...

 

[dayhiker]

That is the advantage of being the owner. Its probably just Christmas money! ... hush hush

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

That is the advantage of being the owner. Its probably just Christmas money! ... hush hush

I just wish he would tell me if he has a plan or not. We have 9G in bills and some of them cannot wait like health insurance and then we have payroll for the next 3 weeks. We take the last week of Dec off.
And it's not Christmas money for us lol. I'm fortunate to have this job but we haven't got bonuses in the last 4 years and I don't expect one until he starts getting paid regularly so...

 

[MorkandMindy]

OK here's something to think about: if a person became a Christian at 22 what is the minimum amount of sanctification the person should experience over the next 10 years?

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

OK here's something to think about: if a person became a Christian at 22 what is the minimum amount of sanctification the person should experience over the next 10 years?

I guess I'm having a blonde moment, I don't understand the question...amount of sanctification?

 

[Doctor Strangelove]

OK here's something to think about: if a person became a Christian at 22 what is the minimum amount of sanctification the person should experience over the next 10 years?

If you are a Christian you are 100% saint and 100% sinner.

The Damnable Paradox that Saves - by Steven Hein

 

[MorkandMindy]

If you are a Christian you are 100% saint and 100% sinner.

The Damnable Paradox that Saves - by Steven Hein

Somehow I think this is giving Christians as much trouble as it is totally confusing the non Christians.



Two months ago a nearby school morning assembly was about how much a person can achieve with their life if they put their mind to it and obey God. Always upbeat and witty and a very outgoing Christian Jimmy Saville ran hundreds of marathons raising money for charity as well as being a television presenter and taking a personal interest in the charities.

The next week in assembly the Principal gave a retraction.



I think we are just as confused over here as everyone else is.

 

[dayhiker]

I used to be more concern about sin, besides the few sins I knew about that there were many many sins of omission. But its the Holy Spirit who convicts us of sin and the Holy Spirit wasn't telling me I was sinning and directing me what to so so that I wouldn't be sinning.

Then I started to notice verse like the one where Jesus says love does no harm to our neighbor. We I don't see that I'm doing any harm to anyone, except for rare occasions. I know about them and repent of those. Then there is the verse that says love fulfills the law. As I meditated on that verse, I couldn't think of an other way that the Bible says we can fulfill the law. I know that I do OK at loving people. So I don't spend much time worrying about these vague undefined sins I'm supposedly committing. The Holy Spirit had and has been asked hundreds of times to set me free from sin. So now I believe that until the Spirit of God speaks to me about something that is a sin, I'm not going looking for dark shadows that I very very seldom find.

Now that is freedom! The freedom Jesus died to bring us, freedom that comes from the Truth, freedom from the bondage of the law including the laws of men. Which I find to be amazing powerful to condemn us even when it never was a law of God! We're free for freedoms sake, Paul said. ... That fills my hear so full of gratitude for what God has done for me.

 

[memoriesbymichelle]

not all of us are called to be like Paul or like the marathon runner you speak of. Some of us may have less (to us anyway) of a calling but just as important in the eyes of God. We all should be being transformed every day of our lives to be more Christ like. Can we arrive? NO we cannot, but that should not stop us from striving. But in striving we do THAT by meditating on the Word and prayer and worship and loving people. And without the Holy Spirit and Jesus Christ we can do NO thing. We need to focus on being the best US that we can be, again by our relationship with Christ and meditating on His Word. JMHO.

 

[renewed21]

Now that I have been single and born again I 've been thinking about what are the abolutes in life.

I've been shown how the modern world is steeped in relativism and basing right and wrong on emotion and pleasure. God is gracious. God has given us the answer(s).

I think I am very greatful to Him. I think it is a duty and honor to be His humble sevant.

 

[dayhiker]

So renewed are you saying that God doesn't have any relativism when it comes to conduct, morality, pleasure?