Do you expect more from Christians?

[GreenMunchkin]

I don't think I've phrased that very well, but do you sort of subconsciously expect more from them? Have realised I very much do, and I don't know if that's ok.

If a non-Christian is mean, am not taken aback in the same way I am when a Christian is mean. This isn't in reference to anything that's happened - have just been thinking about it recently, and I wanted to get some other views, really

Thank you very much for any thoughts

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

I don't think I've phrased that very well, but do you sort of subconsciously expect more from them? Have realised I very much do, and I don't know if that's ok.

If a non-Christian is mean, am not taken aback in the same way I am when a Christian is mean. This isn't in reference to anything that's happened - have just been thinking about it recently, and I wanted to get some other views, really

Thank you very much for any thoughts

Yes, I do expect more from Christians, and I think that's just as it should be. IMO it's silly and useless to try to hold non-believers to Christian standards of behavior or morality. You can't really expect anybody to follow any moral code except the one they believe in, whatever it might be. Which is not to say a non-Christian can't be very ethical or moral: the Dalai Lama seems to be as good as men come, at least as the world judges.

I try not to be too judgmental about anybody, Christian or not, because only God can know what's in somebody's heart, and even the best of Christians stumble sometimes.

 

[Carolyn H]

As a Christian, I pray that I can shine for Him. Non- Christians watch us. They want to see if we talk the talk...or if we realy do as we believe. I too stumble, and Jesus catches me...but I want to live in a way that is pleasing to Him.

 

[Zecryphon]

I don't think I've phrased that very well, but do you sort of subconsciously expect more from them? Have realised I very much do, and I don't know if that's ok.

If a non-Christian is mean, am not taken aback in the same way I am when a Christian is mean. This isn't in reference to anything that's happened - have just been thinking about it recently, and I wanted to get some other views, really

Thank you very much for any thoughts

I don't expect anything of Christians. I don't expect them to be nicer, more kind, or anything just because they are a Christian. To expect such things from a Christian would mean that Christians have to live up to my pre-conceived notion of what a Christian should be. Who am I to place that kind of a burden upon another person? The world does that. They hold us to the 10 Commandments and if we break any of them just once we're a hypocrite, because we don't practice what we preach. They think we should keep the law perfectly because we're Christians. What they don't understand is that if we could keep the law perfectly, the way they expect us to, we wouldn't need Christ's sacrifice on the cross. They also don't understand that keeping the law is not what saves a person.

I know that a Christian is simultaneously a saint and a sinner and they are wrestling with the flesh, just like you and I do. It's a part of who we are. We will be flawed human beings until the day we die, and some of those flaws will be, telling lies, lusting, speaking unkind words, spreading gossip, not always respecting our parents, etc. The key is that we repent of these actions and pray for the power to turn from them, so we don't fall into a lifestyle of sin. We all fall. How we react to such a fall is what makes us a Christian or not. Do we repent, or not? Don't fall into the trap the world has set.

 

[GreenMunchkin]

Yes, I do expect more from Christians, and I think that's just as it should be. IMO it's silly and useless to try to hold non-believers to Christian standards of behavior or morality. You can't really expect anybody to follow any moral code except the one they believe in, whatever it might be. Which is not to say a non-Christian can't be very ethical or moral: the Dalai Lama seems to be as good as men come, at least as the world judges.

I try not to be too judgmental about anybody, Christian or not, because only God can know what's in somebody's heart, and even the best of Christians stumble sometimes.

Actually, you've touched upon something that is a large part of it, perhaps. As you say, the Dalai Lama, for example, is a great man, and a non-Christian. Lots of non-Christians are kinder than lots of Christians. There's bad apples and big, red shiny apples in every group. So am wondering whether expecting more from Christians is inherently insulting or judgemental to non-Christians. Like saying, "Oh, you don't know Jesus like we do. You're bound to be less good than we are, then..." Know what I mean?

Am wondering whether that's almost implicit in subconsciously expecting more from Christians.

 

[Zecryphon]

"Oh, you don't know Jesus like we do. You're bound to be less good than we are, then..."

There are Christians who do actually proclaim this to other people, especially non-Christians. Non-Christians are VERY offended at this attitude. Because what it's saying is that since we have Christ we are better than those who don't. It's an elitist attitude and it turns off a lot of Christians as well. We're not better than anybody because we're saved. If anything we should be more humble than anybody because we are saved. The effect of salvation upon us should generate a completely different attitude than what is generally seen in born-agains.

 

[Sketcher]

I expect Christians to be more forgiving. I also expect different types of Christians to act in certain ways.

 

[GreenMunchkin]

I expect Christians to be more forgiving. I also expect different types of Christians to act in certain ways.

Ya know that hadn't even occurred to me, but I do, too. Are you talking fundamentalist/conservative/liberal delineations or denominational?

 

[Sketcher]

Ya know that hadn't even occurred to me, but I do, too. Are you talking fundamentalist/conservative/liberal delineations or denominational?

Both, kinda.

A lot of Catholics will act one way. Charismatics will be different. Someone who is "too conservative" or "too liberal" to fit in with a church will leave angrily after a while if they choose to come back a second time. Other kinds of people, you can expect a nervous breakdown within six months. And if you see someone street preaching about the KJV or RFID chips, avoid talking to them in general.

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

Ya know that hadn't even occurred to me, but I do, too. Are you talking fundamentalist/conservative/liberal delineations or denominational?

Both, kinda.

A lot of Catholics will act one way. Charismatics will be different. Someone who is "too conservative" or "too liberal" to fit in with a church will leave angrily after a while if they choose to come back a second time. Other kinds of people, you can expect a nervous breakdown within six months. And if you see someone street preaching about the KJV or RFID chips, avoid talking to them in general.

Right. You could tell a fair bit about me, knowing that I'm Assemblies of God, which is Pentecostal and part of the Wesleyan/Methodist tradition. You could tell more if you also knew that I (and my congregation along with me) are liberal for the denomination and emergent-friendly. (But liberal as AG goes is still pretty conservative.)

 

[GreenMunchkin]

Both, kinda.

A lot of Catholics will act one way. Charismatics will be different. Someone who is "too conservative" or "too liberal" to fit in with a church will leave angrily after a while if they choose to come back a second time. Other kinds of people, you can expect a nervous breakdown within six months. And if you see someone street preaching about the KJV or RFID chips, avoid talking to them in general.

But do you have preconceptions as to how people belonging to those groups will react?

See, I expect (rightly or wrongly - mostly wrongly) certain things from fundamentalist/conservative/liberal people... but denomination, no.

 

[Sketcher]

But do you have preconceptions as to how people belonging to those groups will react?

See, I expect (rightly or wrongly - mostly wrongly) certain things from fundamentalist/conservative/liberal people... but denomination, no.

Somewhat fuzzy preconceptions.

 

[Nadiine]

I don't think I've phrased that very well, but do you sort of subconsciously expect more from them? Have realised I very much do, and I don't know if that's ok.

If a non-Christian is mean, am not taken aback in the same way I am when a Christian is mean. This isn't in reference to anything that's happened - have just been thinking about it recently, and I wanted to get some other views, really

Thank you very much for any thoughts

Actually, I find that people's expectations are what aren't biblical.

As if being angry isn't Godly - people have this misnomer that christians should be like angels floating around the sky spreading out glitter & rainbows; doing nothing but what you'de expect perfect angels doing up there but that's not at all biblical.

When you take a look at biblical examples, there's alot of harshness in the NT and OT both. I know I beat this drum repeatedly, but it's true and the misgivings just keep continuing with Christians and nonChristians.

I have no doubt that if Jesus, Paul, John, Jude or Peter were making posts in this forum, quite a few Christians would be rebuking them for comments made.

I believe the realistic expectation should be balance of real emotions and especially without the worldly PC expectations of what people should be - nobody can be that way in real life & nobody is.

In some cases, yes Christians screw up & hopefuly we'll be open to letting God speak to our hearts to repent and apologize - or forgive others their wrongs against us.

 

[MrJim]

I don't expect anything of Christians. I don't expect them to be nicer, more kind, or anything just because they are a Christian. To expect such things from a Christian would mean that Christians have to live up to my pre-conceived notion of what a Christian should be

I think Zecryphon makes a good point here~CFers tend to be more schooled in their particular theological arts and can live a bit in the bubble. Then, because we think we know how others should conduct themselves we are disappointed when we decide it isn't good enough..however it doesn't excuse what should be better, we just have to know how to handle it (which I don't very well)...

Reminds me of a story from the Desert Fathers:

Once there was a meeting of monks in Scetis, and they discussed the case of a guilty brother but Pior said nothing. Afterwards he got up and went out, took a sack, filled it with sand, and carried it on his shoulders. He put a little sand in a basket and carried it in front of him.

The monks asked him, "What are you doing?"

He answered, "The sack with a lot of sand is my sins; they are many, so I put them on my back and then I shall not weep for them. The basket with a little sand is the sins of our brother and they are in front of me, and I see them and judge them. This is not right. I ought to have my own sins in front of me, and think about them, and ask God to forgive me."

When the monks heard this, they said, "This is the true way of salvation."

 

[Criada]

I don't think I've phrased that very well, but do you sort of subconsciously expect more from them? Have realised I very much do, and I don't know if that's ok.

If a non-Christian is mean, am not taken aback in the same way I am when a Christian is mean. This isn't in reference to anything that's happened - have just been thinking about it recently, and I wanted to get some other views, really

Thank you very much for any thoughts

I used to. A year ago, I would have said yes, I think.

Then I discovered just how horrible I could be... and how big God's grace is.

 

[Nadiine]

I used to. A year ago, I would have said yes, I think.

Then I discovered just how horrible I could be... and how big God's grace is.

this is the key I think - we all screw up becuz we're still in a human shell with a sinful nature.

We'd all like to wish as Christians that we'd somehow turn into angels, but... even tho in some areas we can do alot better and become better than we were before salvation,
we still let God & others down continually in some way or another.

Nobody can be what others expect of us - it's no wonder God tells us to forgive 70x's 7 and not to be easy to take offense.
We not only expect alot from other Christians, but we fail like the rest of those we expect more from.

With all that said, GOD expects more from us - we have a whole Bible full of commands and admonitions to strive to live up to.
My post is in no way any excuse to just continue doing what we want, we do have a higher standard; we just can't hit the bar

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

Once there was a meeting of monks in Scetis, and they discussed the case of a guilty brother but Pior said nothing. Afterwards he got up and went out, took a sack, filled it with sand, and carried it on his shoulders. He put a little sand in a basket and carried it in front of him.

The monks asked him, "What are you doing?"

He answered, "The sack with a lot of sand is my sins; they are many, so I put them on my back and then I shall not weep for them. The basket with a little sand is the sins of our brother and they are in front of me, and I see them and judge them. This is not right. I ought to have my own sins in front of me, and think about them, and ask God to forgive me."

When the monks heard this, they said, "This is the true way of salvation."

That's a terrific story!

 

[MrJim]

That's a terrific story!

Ever read The Desert Fathers~Sayings of the Early Christian Monks?

This is the version I have~Penguin Books 2003

This version (I hear there are some that are arranged differently) is chaptered off by topics, and most entries are just a paragraph, many are just a few sentences~~18 different subjects; I've read it a few times, keep it on the nightstand and read a few entries before bed on occasion..those monks and hermits were an interesting sort..there are still monks but I don't know if there are many hermits around anymore..

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

Ever read The Desert Fathers~Sayings of the Early Christian Monks?

This is the version I have~Penguin Books 2003

This version (I hear there are some that are arranged differently) is chaptered off by topics, and most entries are just a paragraph, many are just a few sentences~~18 different subjects; I've read it a few times, keep it on the nightstand and read a few entries before bed on occasion..those monks and hermits were an interesting sort..there are still monks but I don't know if there are many hermits around anymore..

Nope, but now that I know about it, it sure sounds like a good read. I'll add it to my list.

 

[ladyt28]

I would like to say that I do expect more from someone who claims to be a Christina but then I have to admit that many who say they are Christian are about as serious about it as they person who always says "fine" when asked how they are feeling - it seems to be an automatic response that means very little if anything at all. I have also met people who feel that they are such sinners that they could never call themselves "Christian" yet that very attitude and realization has them (how do I say this) well on a path to true Christian living.

So, could I hold someone to a higher standard by their own definition of being a Christian? Not without knowing exactly what it is that they mean by saying they are a Christian. Also, we are ALL sinners, whether we claim to be a Christian or not - some of the greatest heroes in the Bible were the greatest sinners.