Do looks matter?

ummidrinkcherrycoke · Jan 7, 2004

I say yes.

I could never see myself married to a woman I wasnt physically attracted to. To me looks are important. A lot of people will say thats shallow but.... sorry its the truth.

God made us all different with different tastes. People find different things attractive. Girls I find attractive my friends think are ugly and vice versa. I think that we're all covered and that no matter what someone finds you (who ever you are) attractive.

What do you think?

DogBluff · Jan 7, 2004

I absolutely agree. I can't see anyone marring anyone else that they don't find attractive. But I do ,however, know that sometimes someone that you don't initially find attractive may become better looking after you've gotten to know them better. A friend of mine had been happily married for 15 years to a man that she says she never would have picked out of a crowd as handsome. And also, my father asked my mother out on a date six times before she said yes. She said she just didn't find him attractive at first, but after she got to know him, her ideals changed. They've been married for 32 years. The point I'm trying to make is one hard for me deal with. Often I will dismiss a man that I don't initially find attractive and go for the more shallow man. Which is probably why I also end up boyfriend-less and with a crush on my less "conventionally handsome" guy friends who I become attracted to once I get to know them well.

enslow · Jan 7, 2004

Looks are strongly influenced by personality. A person that seems to be a supermodel on first sight may become ugly to you once you get to know that person. A person that seems 'plain Jane' may turn out to be the most beautiful girl to you on the planet.

Enslow

Stanfi · Jan 7, 2004

They say "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder", I think the person you are with needs to be attractive to you, whether or not they are to anyone else. Looks are something that can be deceiving, when you find one of the girls that are "Good looking and they know it", then as a guy you better watch it. 9 times out of 10 that is their license to walk all over you. That's how it seems to me anyway.

I think you are better off just to find a decent looking gal, that will treat you like you are somebody.

desi · Jan 7, 2004

Yes, looks keep you together during those rare times when everything else fails.

msjones21 · Jan 7, 2004

Define attractive? Are we talking about someone who dresses really sharp, has a great body, perfectly straight and white teeth, void of any physical imperfections (birthmarks, moles, scars, acne, etc.)? Or are we talking about someone who is beautiful on the inside? I agree with whoever said that sometimes a person who doesn't seem as outwardly appealing as someone else, may become incredibly attractive to someone as time progresses. I don't think a relationship should be based upon looks alone...for example - you go to church with a girl who may be slightly overweight, maybe she doesn't wear the greatest clothes, and she doesn't wear makeup, but she is on fire for God and loves the Lord with all of her heart. What if she's really funny? What if she's committed to purity and being a Proverbs woman? Could you look past the exterior and see her for the beautiful woman she is on the inside or would the physical imperfections prevent you from getting to know her int he first place?

stray bullet · Jan 7, 2004

The most attractive part of a woman is her heart, period. If a woman isn't pure, she's just going to become ugly to me.

Really, anymore I don't think looks are that important. I think too many guys and girls are worried about their looks when they have no need to be.

msjones21 · Jan 7, 2004

I think too many guys and girls are worried about their looks when they have no need to be.

Amen! I don't like to look sloppy and unkept and I am working to lose weight, but I'm not out there looking to "catch a date". I wish men and women wouldn't be so preoccupied with their physical appearance. Instead they should be more focused on what would be edifying to Christ.

stray bullet · Jan 7, 2004

msjones21 said:
Amen! I don't like to look sloppy and unkept and I am working to lose weight, but I'm not out there looking to "catch a date". I wish men and women wouldn't be so preoccupied with their physical appearance. Instead they should be more focused on what would be edifying to Christ.

By showing little interest in our appearance I think we are indirectly giving people the idea that "I'm not interested". So, I do think showing 'satisfactory' interest in our appearance might be an indirect turn-off. Look at what animals in nature do, they often go to great lengths to 'show off' to the opposite sex to attract them and let them know they are interested.

Being obsessed about looks is a terrible thing, but making yourself more presentable than the occasion calls for might not be that bad of an idea.

charligirl · Jan 8, 2004

desi said:
Yes, looks keep you together during those rare times when everything else fails.

Good grief I hope not.. I was kind of relying on Love, God and Faith to do that!!

wvmtnkid · Jan 8, 2004

I agree with the person you are with needs to be attractive to you. And that personality and the condition of their heart has alot to do with attractiveness. A guy that I used to work with was very handsome. He had no lack of female companionship. I had known him a long, long time. We were really good friends. We could talk about anything. Many of my other friends just couldn't understand why we didn't end up together since we spent alot of time together. The main reason was that he had a heart condition. Jesus wasn't in it. To me, that made him unattractive. That made his good looks, well, not so good looking.

But, I think there has to be some degree of physcial attraction. But, only you can figure out what is physically attractive to you. What you might find attractive, I might not. And you shouldn't let someone else, mainly the world, define that for you. I must admit though, that I am bad to overlook someone I don't find initially attractive to me. Working on it though!

PetraFan007 · Jan 8, 2004

Attractive to me: beautiful face----- great smile, awesome eyes, pretty long hair...etc. They don't gotta be a model, or even 100% in shape. It's not too much the body for me as it is the face. There are women out there that a noticably overweight who are good looking, because I look at the face first, not the "body".

mbuc · Jan 8, 2004

Attractive to me: beautiful face----- great smile, awesome eyes, pretty long hair...etc.

THIS THREAD IS WORTHLESS WITHOUT--

er, nevermind. Sorry.

The Fine Print: this will probably only make sense if you read the Lord of the Rings Babes thread over in the men's forum. If you didn't see it, please ignore the crazy person.

msjones21 · Jan 8, 2004

There are women out there that a noticably overweight who are good looking, because I look at the face first, not the "body".

Yay! I'm one of those women.

desi · Jan 8, 2004

charligirl said:
Good grief I hope not.. I was kind of relying on Love, God and Faith to do that!!

Its worked in a pinch for 9 years so far, or maybe its just my indominable will.

desi · Jan 8, 2004

msjones21 said:
Yay! I'm one of those women.

Prove it! Lets get a look at ya.

cutekid 4 Jesus · Jan 9, 2004

She doesnt have to 'prove it!lol!If she recognizes her own beauty its all good,people have different tastes anyway.

msjones21 · Jan 9, 2004

Prove it! Lets get a look at ya.

This isn't for Mardi Gras beads is it? I've fallen for that trick before.:o LOL j/k of course.

And thanks, Cute...you raise a very excellent point. I dated a guy once who was 6'4" and weighed around 150lbs. He could have blown away in a stiff breeze. So here I am in all my full-figure glory and he thought I had the most amazing body he'd ever seen. It's all in the eye of the beholder. What I saw in the mirror as nasty flabby fat he saw as feminine curves. Not to mention, my Creator didn't make any mistakes when he made me.

urbanfaerie · Jan 9, 2004

theres more to a person then their outward appearance. when it comes to true love, looks don't play a factor. initially when u meet someone u don't know jack about them, aside from their appearance.. but once u get to know someone, u begin to love them for who they are..not what they look like.

Xen_Antares · Jan 9, 2004

OK, I can talk about this. For me there has to be at least some sort of physical attraction, as someone else once said there are the eyes, the face and the smile, the body is not all that important. Ive known girls who were heavy weight, shed several pounds and look like a knock out. Then Ive seen girls who are knock outs put on pound after pound until they arent as physically attractive. The heart is what matters most, but that has already been covered.

However the way a person presents themself is also important. Who here would willingly go out with someone who hasnt brushed their teeth in weeks, smells like they have never been introduced to a bar of soap, picks their nose and is constantly making bodily noises? Certainly not I, it doesnt matter how good the heart is, it is hard to be around such a person.

Women who are big have a hard time finding someone who is intrested in dating them because of their body size. I have a similiar problem but on the other end of the spectrum. I am a skeleton with skin and girls are repulsed by that. I am very skinny, but I can't help it, I eat healthy, sometimes I eat less healthy in favor of fatty foods. I am one of those guys who loses weight by eating. Just as guys are shallow by looking away from big girls, girls are just as shallow by turning their noses up at skinny guys. From just talking with girls, I know this is why they dont fall heads over heals for me *LOL*. You dont know how many times Ive been told I would be the perfect guy if I could only have some muscle mass or a little weight. Apparently being able to wrap you fingers around my wrist is a turn off. So I have been rejected do to my weight, or lack there of. I even had the feeling some of the girls that I have dated have been ashamed to introduce me to their friends and family.

Intresting how guys are turned off by the big women, and ladies are turned off by the skinny guys over an issue that they probably cant help.

Do looks matter?

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