Well, I have never posted on this forum at all, although I read various threads at times. My husband and I separated October 6th. We've been married for over 22 years and have had many financial problems and other problems. Separate bank accounts due to mistrust and just unable to keep a joint account straightened out. We had met in church over 24 years ago. Raised our 3 children in church and worked in ministry off and on for years. He was a youth pastor for years and due to church drama and constant issues with this church or that church, we ended up quitting church completely in the last few years. Our kids are now ages 20, 19 and 16. Things have been bad for years now as our entire lives centered around the church world, and ministry and when that fell apart, our family suffered from it. Anyhow, my husband has found new interests and hobbies with motorcycles and hanging out with motorcycle buddies and going to motorcycle rallies and spending money on his hobby. Apparently, he was NOT paying the house payments and other bills either as now the house is in total foreclosure. Payments have been behind for years now and he refused to catch the payments up and would tell me he saw no sense in spending thousands of dollars on repairing the house and catching the payments up when I was going to leave him anyhow. Well, he decided due to how bad things were between us, in steady decline, and I confronted him once again about his spending habits with his motorcycle hang out buddies, going to motorcycle rallies, spending money on leather boots and leather carry on cases for his bike..just how does he have money for that and yet we are having notices put on our front door of our house to contact our mortgage lender immediately? He refused to answer me, and in fact told me his personal finances were NONE of my business and would not give me an explanation as to why he was behind on house payments and quite a few other bills (I opened his mail and found late notices of several months behind on various bills). On top of all of that, I had discovered at least over a year or so ago, he was having his personal bank statements and other bills mailed to his mother's post office box. I confronted the inlaws and my husband and was gave excuses. Finally, about two weeks before my husband left (and he moved in with his mother), he finally tells me he felt he HAD to have certain bills and things sent to his mom's p.o. box because if I saw them, it would cause major disagreements between us and he just didn't want a fight over all of it. I told him you know what you have done is WRONG if you know it's gonna cause a disagreement with you hiding finances or whatever you are hiding from me. So he left on October 6th, blatantly informed me that since me or our daughter (16 year old) no longer wanted him there, he felt he just had to go to his mom's for now. He also stated that he planned to contact the mortgage company and tell them to proceed with foreclosure on the house and that "you had better do something and do it quick and find you and Rachel (our daughter) an apartment or some place to live." Our daughter was sitting in the living room on the couch when he said this. I said okay, this is fine, you do that. Our children are ages 20, 19, and 16 and there is no point in this any longer. I had already talked to and hired an attorney at this point because I knew he was going to allow the house to be foreclosed. This is NOT the first time he's left and moved in with his mom. He did this a few years ago and came back and forth for over a week and a half hassling me until I let him come back home. Nothing got worked out in the long run. I really felt he was kicking us out of the house by telling me what he did. That was on a Sunday. I had found an apartment by the following Thursday and had my family show up at the house with trucks and cleaned out the house. After cleaning out the house and moving, I had the attorney serve him with divorce papers. The attorney told me the papers need to be filed before he calls the mortgage company. I really felt I was left with no other choice in the matter as there is no trust, no respect and my daughter and I were looking at not even having a place to live. Now..he's mad that I filed for divorce. Makes absolutely no sense to me what result he thought he was going to get out of all of that. I have not been to church in over a year and a half due to the drama and hurt my family and I went through. I plan on going to a church tomorrow..although in all honesty..it is so hard to try to find anywhere to go after being married to somebody that "was" a youth pastor for years..knows so many ministers and everywhere me and my kids have gone, I feel like I have a dark cloud hanging over us before we even try to walk in the door. My kids won't go to church anymore at all because of all the church drama that happened with their dad while he was a youth pastor. Not just in one church either, several different churches. We are taking one day at a time. It's been hard. I honestly cannot see how I was married to somebody for so long and I don't even know who he is with what and who he has become. I feel like I'm dealing with Darth Vader from Star Wars. He cannot look me in the eye and be honest with me. He refuses too and I told him your dishonesty with me and all the things you have hidden from me is exactly why you are at your mother's house and you have divorce papers. My oldest boy is 20 and he's in the Marines stationed in Hawaii. The younger boy is 19 and he was living at home until I told him that his sister and I would be leaving. I gave him the option of going with us and I would look for a 3 bedroom apartment or house. He has a full time job himself and he told me he was now 19 and he needed to be "on his own" and he moved in with some friends of his and they are all working jobs and splitting the rent and bills. He moved out of the house 2 weeks before we did. My kids and I need alot of prayer and I could really use some advice is anybody has ever been through anything like this. I have never felt so lost in all my life and I feel like I've been steady running from a snow avalanche that's trying to bury me.