divorce final sooner :(

[blessedmomto4]

We went for a "status hearing" on weds. Nxt thing I know the judge is granting the motion to wave the six month waiting period and, any time between now and 18 days, I will officially be divorced. I cried when the lawyer told me, I cried waiting to see the judge, I cried while in font of the judge and I cried all the way home. I stopped to get a grip on myself before picking up the kids and cried.
I wanted so badly for him to "wake up" before this point. TO want me back. I know I shouldn't He cheated, he walked out on us but, the feeling of rejection... The being a single mom of four kids is the hardest thing I have never done. I am scared and lonely and in complete disbelief that I will be a single woman in 18 days or less.
WOW.

 

[katautumn]

I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. I wish I had wonderful advice, but I saw this and I wanted to send you some ((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))) and let you know I'm praying for you. It is a difficult time ahead of you, but this too shall pass. Be sure to take care of yourself during this time as well. Perhaps find time to attend a Christian divorce care group so that you can get the support you need.

 

[Lotuspetal_uk]

Amen me too!!!

It's not easy at all to go through that you're going through.

On Monday I will be granted my Decree Nisi. I cried too when my lawyer told me the news even though the marriage was abusive. But I cried because I myself came from a broken home and a thought entered my head that my children will officially be a product of a broken home just like me. I can totally empathise with your grief.

In time dear sis the Lord will make us stronger to take the helm of being the loving mothers that we are to our kids. I am confident that Jesus will fill the gap.

It's been two years since we separated and I want to reassure you that for every tear you shed, the Lord will open doors for you, He will sustain you, He will strenghten you, He will show His love to you. This I can testify to even though two years ago I felt so afraid and alone.

Will also keep you lifted in prayer, sis.

 

[Tropical Wilds]

Did you get a lawyer? I saw on another thread he wasn't paying child support... Did you tell the judge? Has this been fixed?

 

[olds8598]

We went for a "status hearing" on weds. Nxt thing I know the judge is granting the motion to wave the six month waiting period and, any time between now and 18 days, I will officially be divorced. I cried when the lawyer told me, I cried waiting to see the judge, I cried while in font of the judge and I cried all the way home. I stopped to get a grip on myself before picking up the kids and cried.
I wanted so badly for him to "wake up" before this point. TO want me back. I know I shouldn't He cheated, he walked out on us but, the feeling of rejection... The being a single mom of four kids is the hardest thing I have never done. I am scared and lonely and in complete disbelief that I will be a single woman in 18 days or less.
WOW.

I just wanted to offer you this hug . I have cried, and also felt rejected and the pain of an unwanted end to almost 11 years. I am not thrilled at being divorced at 48. This April will be two years my ex said she wanted a divorce. 2 years? Boy time has flown. It will also be one year since she got served. It will take time. You WILL heal. Trust God. Rely on Him and lean on Him. Cry to Him. Tell Him your feelings.

I am about to do a separate post from a Kindle book I bought. It's called "Waiting on God." I hope it helps you, blessedmomto4. One more:

 

[Annessa3]

We went for a "status hearing" on weds. Nxt thing I know the judge is granting the motion to wave the six month waiting period and, any time between now and 18 days, I will officially be divorced. I cried when the lawyer told me, I cried waiting to see the judge, I cried while in font of the judge and I cried all the way home. I stopped to get a grip on myself before picking up the kids and cried.
I wanted so badly for him to "wake up" before this point. TO want me back. I know I shouldn't He cheated, he walked out on us but, the feeling of rejection... The being a single mom of four kids is the hardest thing I have never done. I am scared and lonely and in complete disbelief that I will be a single woman in 18 days or less.
WOW.

I can totally relate. When the judge asked us each if the marriage was irretrievably broken, I did not want to say yes. I did say it, because it is the truth, but I didn't want the divorce, and I would have continued my marriage despite everything ( 1x adultery, drunkenness everyday) because that was the promise I made.

However, over the last 4 years of the behavior noted in parentheses, I had lost respect for my husband. It was not overt, but he knew it. And he was not making any behavior changes to turn it around, which continued the cycle.

Rejection--- the failure of expectations--- broken promises. Those are the things that hurt me and still cause me pain.

God will never disappoint you. Lean as hard as you like. Praying for you-
A

 

[dayhiker]

blessedmom ... ya those of us who are divorced have felt pain, many so hurtful it was hard to imagine that it would end one day. But there is life on the other side of divorce. Its a process of change that takes time. Don't get down when you hear a comment about why aren't you over that by now. But know you will see some change in your attitude not too far into the future. God will still be working in your life. He will still be there for you. Continue to stop by here when you can.

 

[blessedmomto4]

Thank you everyone for your hugs and kind words. I was in such a fog when I wrote this I didn't even remember I wrote it. I still don't . I see my name, my situation but, I don't remember actually doing it.

Mid as well update tho while I am here. This past weds the divorce was final. I am now single and I no longer have my husbands last name. It seems so unreal at times. IN fact, often if I am out with the kids on an errand I will think "I wonder what **** would want for dinner" or "I wonder if he will get out on time from work today" It is when I get home that reality smacks me in the face.... YOU ARE DIVORCED dummy!
The thought of him being with someone else (again) is so unbearable. I wish that I didn't wish he still wanted me.

 

[dayhiker]

Ya ... I hear ya.

 

[Svt4Him]

There is a great course called divorcecare, please google it. I am terribly sorry, I know the pain, the fear, I am going through it as well, but I also know the God who helps me is big enough to help any who call on Him. That is the first place to start. Not easy, but there is hope.

 

[Svt4Him]

And please realize it takes a while to heal, don't rush it.