Hi all. Im not one to mince words so I will get right into it...
Recently, I suffered the loss of my best friend. Best man at my wedding and all that jazz. We did alot together, we also grew up together.. I followed him to Christ about 12 years ago now. He was my go-to guy, any hair-brained scheme I came up with he was willing an able to go. Now that's all gone.
He was killed in a car wreck 3 weeks ago Tuesday. First I was sad, then mad, and then ran the gamut of emotions. He was 33, had a wife and 3 little kids. SHe is pregnant now and the baby will never know his or her father. I felt really guilty for a while because of all the silly circumstances surrounding his death. The car he was driving I found for him. I gave him the set of tires that were on that car. He died on the way to work, a job he wouldn't of had if I hadn't helped him out. I felt really bad. I still feel bad.
So. I began to do what alot of people do in these situations. I began to question my faith. I am not a strong Christian by any stretch. I havent been to church in a while. I havent been living the walk for some time. God and I still talk on a regular basis, but nothing formal if you know what I mean. I also know that we are all on different paths and we dont always walk the same, so I never really felt like I was out of the Lords grace by any means.
In my walk. I felt that God was asking me to grow up. Give up my childish ways and inhibitions and seek the truth and the life. I told Him that I wasnt a leader and I have a problem following others myself. Examples and choices were what He fired back.
Don't you think we have lost something in this world? When you have children mouthing off to elders and those same elders beating the heck out of them for doing so there is a problem. At work, I deal with apathy and hatred from my fellow workers. Apathy towards the company, hatred towards those people who are just a bit different than the others. It is a pretty tense environment. I hate to admit, but I was sucked in as well. I slack off here and there. Get into conversations that lead to nothing but spite and venemous words. Let me tell you now that if I didnt talk to people out there it would be a real lonely place. I feel sick about it all the time. I fake being ill to go home or not to show up (lies) I dread going there every day because I fear what it is turning me into. I cannot quit because I need the job to pay off my living expenses and my debts. I do not lead by example.
How can we get the passion back? Where do people find the will to go above and beyond all the backbiting and name calling? What's it take to lead by example? How can one get a strong will and spirit?
Recently, I suffered the loss of my best friend. Best man at my wedding and all that jazz. We did alot together, we also grew up together.. I followed him to Christ about 12 years ago now. He was my go-to guy, any hair-brained scheme I came up with he was willing an able to go. Now that's all gone.
He was killed in a car wreck 3 weeks ago Tuesday. First I was sad, then mad, and then ran the gamut of emotions. He was 33, had a wife and 3 little kids. SHe is pregnant now and the baby will never know his or her father. I felt really guilty for a while because of all the silly circumstances surrounding his death. The car he was driving I found for him. I gave him the set of tires that were on that car. He died on the way to work, a job he wouldn't of had if I hadn't helped him out. I felt really bad. I still feel bad.
So. I began to do what alot of people do in these situations. I began to question my faith. I am not a strong Christian by any stretch. I havent been to church in a while. I havent been living the walk for some time. God and I still talk on a regular basis, but nothing formal if you know what I mean. I also know that we are all on different paths and we dont always walk the same, so I never really felt like I was out of the Lords grace by any means.
In my walk. I felt that God was asking me to grow up. Give up my childish ways and inhibitions and seek the truth and the life. I told Him that I wasnt a leader and I have a problem following others myself. Examples and choices were what He fired back.
Don't you think we have lost something in this world? When you have children mouthing off to elders and those same elders beating the heck out of them for doing so there is a problem. At work, I deal with apathy and hatred from my fellow workers. Apathy towards the company, hatred towards those people who are just a bit different than the others. It is a pretty tense environment. I hate to admit, but I was sucked in as well. I slack off here and there. Get into conversations that lead to nothing but spite and venemous words. Let me tell you now that if I didnt talk to people out there it would be a real lonely place. I feel sick about it all the time. I fake being ill to go home or not to show up (lies) I dread going there every day because I fear what it is turning me into. I cannot quit because I need the job to pay off my living expenses and my debts. I do not lead by example.
How can we get the passion back? Where do people find the will to go above and beyond all the backbiting and name calling? What's it take to lead by example? How can one get a strong will and spirit?
