Constantly thinking of a girl

[Zalu]

I know this sounds silly, but she's been almost always on my mind for the past few days. It's not something I can really control either. Say I'll be watching tv or something. She'll just pop into my mind & I'll be stuck thinking about her for at least 30 minutes or so. They're not "dirty"/impure thoughts either. The only times I don't think about her are when I'm praying or going into my Bible. It started when I had this dream about her, in which I kissed her, and she reacted pretty positively. She's in my small group and she's only an acquaintance of mine (which will officially be starting friday). I'm wondering if these thoughts could've been brought on by God trying to tell me something? I'm just not sure what to do... Thanks in advance for the replies!

Edit: I thought I should add that I've added her on Facebook & talked to her a couple times on there and she doesn't seem to be opposed to friendship in real life or the internet (if that counts for anything).

 

[Loi13]

hm... that's tough.
You sound like you're on a good path already. Props for attending a small group, praying, and reading The Bible.
I could be totally wrong, but here's my suggestion:
Dreams can be misleading. I started liking a girl after I had a dream I kissed her. Now I am glad I did not pursue a relationship with her. I've had numerous crushes on acquaintances which faded after I got to know them better.
On the other hand, your hunch might be right. God might be trying to tell you something. It's a little early to tell.
I would suggest talking with her in the small group. Maybe exchange email addresses and try to talk with her outside of the group. If she doesn't seem interested in a friendship, don't push her. My personal MO is to send an email and wait for the other person to write back. I never send more than one email without a response. If you focus on developing the friendship first, you can see if she is a woman of good character who your parents would approve of and who God would want you to have a relationship with.
My friend and I have what might be an extreme view. We don't think people should date at all. People should simply focus on developing friendships, then you could marry one of these friends. This saves people from the pain of break-ups. This is just an opinion and there's no biblical evidence that dating is a sin.
Keep praying and if you aren't sure whether or not God wants you to date this girl, wait. Both Jesus and the apostle Paul prefer singleness to relationships (though relationships aren't a sin, only a lesser good).
I hope I've been helpful. Good luck. Feel free to post any questions or updates.

 

[LWB]

Hi Zalu.

What you report seems to be a fairly natural reaction to encountering someone you find attractive. Get to know her, see if there is mutual interest, and enjoy the ride.

 

[pilgrimgal]

Continue to pray that the Lord helps you with these feelings which sound like infatuation right now..and attraction is surely normal and how this relationship could be beginning. Since she is in your small group you have a good opportunity to get to know her better. But it does bring concern to me when I hear you say that the "only" times you don't think about her is when you are praying and into your bible. So there could be some obsessive thoughts going on which may not be good if distracting you so often. When you pray ask the Lord to help you sort that out and also try thinking of something else. 30 minutes at a time is just not too healthy when you don't really even know her yet.

You need to know the real person better and maybe in time you will. Trust the Lord if it is to be it will be as long as you are cool about it and focus on Him.

peace, prayers, and blessings.

 

[BL2KTN]

Good lord, people. You like the girl, go talk to her and see what happens. It's not from God, it's not bad, it is natural, and it's just a part of growing up.

BL

 

[Sketcher]

It's too early to say whether God is putting her on your heart or not. It doesn't sound like you need divine help to do that. This just sounds normal.

 

[Zalu]

Thanks again for all of the replies! It makes sense that I could just be attracted to her. I haven't thought about a girl being anything more than just a friend for the past 6 months or so (ever since I'd been saved) and I guess that was time for me to focus on the Lord, get my life straight, and priorities in order.

 

[homeofmew]

talk to her get to know her, not sure. sounds like there is an attraction either physically or by some meeting with her that has happened. Go with it be friends first don't take things too fast.

 

[heron]

I agree, it sounds very normal. But those obsessive thoughts can really consume your time. Try praying for her when she's on your mind, and you'll be accomplishing something at the same time you're enjoying her existence.

I've had a few times when I mistook a call for prayer, for relationship thoughts. One person had a serious accident, and I was thinking God was putting them on my mind for my own benefit. : doh :

 

[perrfekt]

Good lord, people. You like the girl, go talk to her and see what happens. It's not from God, it's not bad, it is natural, and it's just a part of growing up.

BL

 

[Mister_Al]

Good lord, people. You like the girl, go talk to her and see what happens. It's not from God, it's not bad, it is natural, and it's just a part of growing up.

BL

I agree, it sounds very normal. But those obsessive thoughts can really consume your time. Try praying for her when she's on your mind, and you'll be accomplishing something at the same time you're enjoying her existence.

I've had a few times when I mistook a call for prayer, for relationship thoughts. One person had a serious accident, and I was thinking God was putting them on my mind for my own benefit. : doh :

I agree with BlueLightningTN and with Heron. First, I think you should start praying for her. God may be putting her on your mind because He wants you in prayer for the young lady. Second, there is nothing wrong with being attracted to her so try and get to know her and see what happens.


Be Blessed,

Alan

 

[fffaux]

its simple, talk to her, a lot, eventually, ask her out. make your feelings clear though, there's nothing more annoying than that enigma.