Confession.

[Matthias]

Hi there,

I have a question. Let's say a Catholic person hadn't gone to a confession in many, many years, and wanted to convert to Orthodoxy. Let's say, 20 years without going to confession. This is just a hypothetical question, by the way.

What would this person say to a his Orthodox priest before converting? Like, at their first confession. For someone who hadn't gone in 20 years, I imagine they'd have either:

a. Forgotton most of their sins over the 20 years, so cannot say them to a priest to be forgiven for.

b. Have so many sins that if they did tell them to the priest, they'd be there for about 12 hours straight.

If you knew someone in this situation, what would you say to them? What would you suggest? I have a Catholic friend who goes to confession on a non-regular basis, sometimes leaving it till years, and when he goes, he says something like:

"Well, about the only commandment I haven't broken is the one about murder.".

Whereas I know another person who says she tells her priest ever sin, sometimes spending hours and hours in confession whenever she goes on a non-regular basis.

Is there a proper way? Or can someone who hasn't gone to confession for 20 years or so, just say:

"Well, about the only commandment I haven't broken is the one about murder.".

I myself haven't gone to a confession for a LONG time - not quite 20 years, but close, so I guess this relates to me in a way!

Thanks for your input and help!

Cheers,

Matthew Sheehan.

 

[Alfred M]

Matthias,

Great question! When we (my family and me) converted about 5 years ago, confession to our priest was part of that process. He explained it to us and fortunately we had Orthodox Christian prayer booklets that had a good section on self preparation forconfession. Along with specific prayers, it took the Ten Commandments one by one and listed things to think about as each commandment might apply to our lives.

We focused on those aspects of sin in our lives that led us into further sin. This way we sought forgiveness for all our sins that were known and unknown. We were also told that if there were specific sins that were bothersome to our souls, to be sure and mention all those specifically.

Remembering that sins are committed through thought, word, and deed, it would be impossible to remember all of the individual sins committed (at least for me). If you are interested in a copy of this small prayer book, send me a PM and I will see to it that you get a copy.

In the love of our Saviour,

Alfred (wishing I could be at Divine Liturgy right now)

 

[MariaRegina]

Dear Matthew:

It's difficult to read your post in orange -- so I had to double click "quote" in order to read it. Just thought I would mention this in case anyone else has vision problems.

I have a question. Let's say a Catholic person hadn't gone to a confession in many, many years, and wanted to convert to Orthodoxy. Let's say, 20 years without going to confession. This is just a hypothetical question, by the way.
What would this person say to a his Orthodox priest before converting? Like, at their first confession. For someone who hadn't gone in 20 years, I imagine they'd have either:
a. Forgotton most of their sins over the 20 years, so cannot say them to a priest to be forgiven for.

When a person converts to Orthodoxy, the priest asks him to make a full-life confession, and the Holy Spirit definitely helps. I was able to remember a sin I committed as a two year old (24 months old). Good thing I didn't die as a toddler!

Seriously, if a person cannot remember all his sins -- and who can as we sin knowingly or unknowingly, and deliberately or indeliberately, by thought, word and deed -- we should not worry or that will lead to scrupulosity. We should confess what we remember after thoroughtly examining our consciences and writing those sins down. If we forgot some serious sin, we can confess it the next time.

For a whole year after making my full-life confession, my confessor would ask me if the Holy Spirit had revealed to me any sins that I may have inadvertently omitted when I made my full life confession. He told me that the Holy Spirit will enlighten us and will convict us of any unrepented sins if we ask Him.

b. Have so many sins that if they did tell them to the priest, they'd be there for about 12 hours straight.

If you knew someone in this situation, what would you say to them? What would you suggest? I have a Catholic friend who goes to confession on a non-regular basis, sometimes leaving it till years, and when he goes, he says something like:

My first full-life confession took about 45 minutes. From what I heard that is the average time. It's not good nor necessary to go into the minute details of each sin. Just name the sin and don't mention the specifics unless the priest wants clarification -- and he will ask if he's unsure. For example, if you mentioned that you lied -- he may want to know if lied about someone's character = defamation and slander, if you lied about your faith = apostasy, or what kind of lie it was.

Is there a proper way? Or can someone who hasn't gone to confession for 20 years or so, just say:

"Well, about the only commandment I haven't broken is the one about murder.".

I myself haven't gone to a confession for a LONG time - not quite 20 years, but close, so I guess this relates to me in a way!

A priest told me that if a person said that "Well, about the only commandment I haven't broken is the one about murder," then he would ask them to specify all those sins: not attending Sunday services, manual labor on Sunday, etc.

Regarding murder, most of us have committed that sin in our hearts when someone on the freeway cuts us off... If we call anyone a fool, that is the same as murder according to the scriptures.

We must repent of all our sins -- hate all our sins -- in order to be forgiven. We must be sorry and have experienced a complete change of heart -- metanoia -- before we come to the priest for confession. It is also necessary to ask forgiveness of all those we have offended. Confession, therefore, should never be rushed.

Hope this helps.

Elizabeth

 

[isshinwhat]

We must repent of all our sins -- hate all our sins -- in order to be forgiven. We must be sorry and have experienced a complete change of heart -- metanoia -- before we come to the priest for confession. It is also necessary to ask forgiveness of all those we have offended. Confession, therefore, should never be rushed.

Beautifully put, as always, Elizabeth.

God Bless,

Neal

 

[MariaRegina]

Dearest Neal,

Glad to see you posting again. I've missed you.

Lovingly yours in Christ,
Elizabeth

 

[Matthias]

Thanks everyone for your very informative responses. I'm sorry the orange caused you to not be able to read my text.

It's more of a dark orange on my computer which is why I thought it'd be fine. Anyways, thanks!