Comments from strangers that have hurt?

Birbitt · May 14, 2008

I'm with you on the strangers not touching my babies thing. I actually was at a restaurant waiting to be seated once and some lady grabbed my son's arm and pulled him out of her way. She grabbed him so hard that he started crying ow, ow, ow mama she's hurting me. So I told the lady to "take her hands off my child and that she'd better hope she didn't leave any marks on my son. Her reply was well if you would keep him out of where I need to walk we wouldn't have a problem....I was like He's looking at the fish....go around him." So yeah I totally understand that one.

Neenie1 · May 15, 2008

Yeah about the sock thing, I noticed that too when mine were babies who weren't walking yet, it could be Summer and boiling hot, everyone else is wearing sandals, and because the baby is in the stroller without shoes or socks on, someone feels the right to comment ROFL. If I wasn't walking I would be in bare feet too, if it was hot.

It is usually older people that say it, and I found out why, MIL said a while ago when ds was a baby (before he was even crawling) do you want me to buy him some shoes. Seems that they always used to put babies in shoes, whereas these days most parents wait until they are walking steadily to put their babies in shoes.

ShannonMcCatholic · May 15, 2008

LOL- people don't say too much to me now--well not negative stuff. When T was born I looked really young and so I think they felt obligated to "instruct" me how to parent.

Now if I 'm out with all five--most people gotta defer to me, because I have more kids And my kids are pretty good about working together as a team--and get complimented wherever we go (as if there's no way someone with so many kids could possibly teach them how to beave in public) and of course commented on...but I have standard disarming (not mean) things I say- to push people past their comfort level and then they usually shut up

Not too often but every now and then I'll get the "You know what causes that, right?" comment about my kids...and I say something stupid like "No--why don't you tell me?" or say all dreamily "Yeahhhhhhhh....mmmmmmmm....".

I do try to tell the difference between people being just rude and overstepping social boundaries--and people who are genuinely curious. People are fascinated my slings and wraps, etc---and they do comment a lot--but I have found that what they really want is more information. (LOL!! lazy, indeed-I'd like to see that lady lug around a baby for a couple hours!)

MyaShane · May 15, 2008

Birbitt said:
I'm with you on the strangers not touching my babies thing. I actually was at a restaurant waiting to be seated once and some lady grabbed my son's arm and pulled him out of her way. She grabbed him so hard that he started crying ow, ow, ow mama she's hurting me. So I told the lady to "take her hands off my child and that she'd better hope she didn't leave any marks on my son. Her reply was well if you would keep him out of where I need to walk we wouldn't have a problem....I was like He's looking at the fish....go around him." So yeah I totally understand that one.

Wow! I would have absolutely flipped!! A comment is one thing, but you hurt my baby and it's on!!

EmilyF · May 15, 2008

Oh I said something. Not then but as they were leaving and the girl threw a tantrum and the mom calmed it by buying her a toy. Levi gave me his "What The?" look. I told him, "Some people just don't teach their kids right.
Little old ladies accost me about my cold kids pretty often. I try to be nicer to them.
I really don't mind touching too much depending on the "vibe" I get from people. My boys both have crazy big blue eyes so people touch their heads or their cheeks occasionally. If I get a good vibe, I don't mind. If I get a bad one I tell the person we don't let people touch the boys because it confuses them about who they can say no to.

-~Truth_N_Trust~- · May 15, 2008

ugh. the cold one I get ALL THE TIME! Yes, I actually do want my baby to freeze.

heart of peace · May 15, 2008

I have my fair share of inappropriate strangers' comments but only one comment actually hurt me. It was made by an acquaintance who claimed to be childfree. Whenever he referred to my son in conversation, he insisted on using the pronoun 'it'. I remember stating that I have a son therefore the correct pronoun would be 'he' and he said that until my son adds value to society, he is unworthy of recognition as a person. Wow. Needless to say that relationship was severed and he believed that I was overreacting to the it comment.

Birbitt · May 15, 2008

MyaShane said:
Wow! I would have absolutely flipped!! A comment is one thing, but you hurt my baby and it's on!!

Yeah I actually went and spoke to the manager about the problem and he told the woman that if she laid her hands on another child they would have to ask her to leave because this was a family restaurant and we can't have customers running around hurting children.

Birbitt · May 15, 2008

MsDahl said:
I have my fair share of inappropriate strangers' comments but only one comment actually hurt me. It was made by an acquaintance who claimed to be childfree. Whenever he referred to my son in conversation, he insisted on using the pronoun 'it'. I remember stating that I have a son therefore the correct pronoun would be 'he' and he said that until my son adds value to society, he is unworthy of recognition as a person. Wow. Needless to say that relationship was severed and he believed that I was overreacting to the it comment.

I can't believe someone would say something so hurtful. WOW I think that would have pushed me over the edge and I would have had to say something smart alecky to that person.

hisbloodformysins · May 15, 2008

MopedMommeigh said:
HI all, I'm Emily. Mom to Levi (2.5) and Patrick (7 months.) When Levi was not yet 2 (but looked 3 because he was [and still is to a lesser degree] big for his age) we were at a thrift store. He wasn't talking yet (he was a wee bit behind, just enough to be a bit odd to some especially given his size) and this little girl asked her mother why. The woman's response was "Honey, some people just don't teach their child right."
I was livid. Anyone else have some bad stranger comments to share?

I don't know how mature this is... but I would have made a rude remark....

Neenie1 · May 16, 2008

MsDahl said:
I have my fair share of inappropriate strangers' comments but only one comment actually hurt me. It was made by an acquaintance who claimed to be childfree. Whenever he referred to my son in conversation, he insisted on using the pronoun 'it'. I remember stating that I have a son therefore the correct pronoun would be 'he' and he said that until my son adds value to society, he is unworthy of recognition as a person. Wow. Needless to say that relationship was severed and he believed that I was overreacting to the it comment.

Wow, I can't believe there are people that think this way, let alone voice their opinions to people who have children. (no I'm not that naive to believe that there aren't people who feel this way, it's just I can't understand it!!!)

I don't think I would be speaking to this person again either.

Called2Grace · May 16, 2008

MsDahl said:
I have my fair share of inappropriate strangers' comments but only one comment actually hurt me. It was made by an acquaintance who claimed to be childfree. Whenever he referred to my son in conversation, he insisted on using the pronoun 'it'. I remember stating that I have a son therefore the correct pronoun would be 'he' and he said that until my son adds value to society, he is unworthy of recognition as a person. Wow. Needless to say that relationship was severed and he believed that I was overreacting to the it comment.

Had he added value to society? I would have started referring to the friend as "it" in conversation too, but I guess I'm a little rude like that!

heart of peace · May 16, 2008

When the relationship was severed, it didn't happen amicably, let's put it this way. He went on to spew many more hateful things about kids and how he isn't a leach to society (as children are in his opinion) and how he was adding value simply because he is choosing not to procreate and add any more to our "overpopulation" issue, blah blah blah. After I consciously closed myself off to the relationship, nothing further that he had to say affected me. It was all a bunch of noise.

Black-bird fly · May 16, 2008

I never understood that line of thinking. We were all children once so to not like kids seems to not like a portion of our own life. I've had child-free explain it to me but I still don't understand it. I feel very tied to my own childhood it was that which gave me the values and views that I have.

Comments from strangers that have hurt?

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