Closure? How?!

[looksgood]

Well, I was just wondering how you would get some closure?

Lets say you been thinken of asking someone out and you finaly do.
Now say they tell you "Maybe". But that is all you get. You said you wanted to get together some time and they say maybe. And the only way you get to talk to them again is by phone IF they call.

You can bet your bottom $ they are not calling to say "How bout tonight?". But you left your # and they said they will think about it.

How do you get freken closure?! LOL There is no definite NO only a "maybe", that you know is bound to be a rejection.

I can personaly handle rejection, but this is an interesting thought I never thought of till now.

 

[msjones21]

I don't think "closure" is a real necessity in a situation in which you weren't *with* somebody; however, moving on is an important factor. When I need to pick myself up by the bootstraps, I go to Barnes & Noble, drink some Starbucks, and read books to keep my mind off things. Then I go home and I ask God to remove any feelings from me that are not of Him. Your bad feelings may not be instantly erased but in time it will work out.

 

[looksgood]

Meh, it isn't a big deal. It is just that small room for the thought "maybe she will call."
You know it won't happen but some reason something keeps holding on. Thats why a NO would be much better.

 

[IndyCision]

Closure? Doesn't sound like it was opened.

Sounds like you got an I don't want to hurt you feelings no.

 

[Living4Him03]

So ask her for an answer. Tell her maybe is not an answer and you would rather it be either yes or no. Honestly most girls know either yes or no when you ask us out. I can't recall a time I ever said "maybe"...maybe probably means "maybe if you were a different guy"...sorry that's just the way things go sometimes. Not that an answer of maybe is a good answer. If she isn't even willing to give you a straight answer, why even give her so much thought? There are other girls out there who are just as pretty, smart, etc. who will give you a "sure" or a "no, sorry" . Don't waste your time with a girl who can't make up her mind or isn't decent enough to give you a straight answer!

 

[looksgood]

Yeah...like I told myself before. If the girl rejects you she aint worth you. Thanks for saying Don't waste your time with a girl who can't give you a straight answer. Made a lot of sence.

 

[Stanfi]

The only way I know is to ask the person, and get them to tell you why. Of courres this will usually on with if you have known the person for a while and they have consideration for your feelings, and understand the need of getting closure.

If that doesn't work. You just have to ask God to heal your heart, and give you the grace to move on.

 

[wvmtnkid]

Unfortunately, we don't always get closure. Yes, it would be nice, but in the real world, it doesn't always happen. I have found that if a person is truly interested in you, they don't have a problem making time for you. In fact, they will move mountains to make time for you.

If this girl isn't making time for you or thinking she was doing you a favor by not hurting your feelings and stringing you along, then she isn't worth your time. You followed your heart and you took a shot. That is something you should be proud of. Now take that self confidence and apply it to someone who is worth your time.

 

[oworm]

By constantly bringing it up you opening your self up to being strung along! Put it all on the back burner. give it to God. Remain as friends and dont mention it again to her. I think that's about as close to "closure" as you'll get in these circumstances!

 

[Stanfi]

Unfortunately, we don't always get closure. Yes, it would be nice, but in the real world, it doesn't always happen. I have found that if a person is truly interested in you, they don't have a problem making time for you. In fact, they will move mountains to make time for you.

If this girl isn't making time for you or thinking she was doing you a favor by not hurting your feelings and stringing you along, then she isn't worth your time. You followed your heart and you took a shot. That is something you should be proud of. Now take that self confidence and apply it to someone who is worth your time.

What she said!! I have found this to be very true!

 

[looksgood]

Yeah well...right now I am just looking into the future saying "Now what?".

Either way I am just gona go on with my life (such as it is).

Not really needing a sure yes or no. I can read between the lines. I was just taken a bit back. I didn't think it would affect me that much if she said no. Never thought how it would do me if she said maybe while saying no in her own head. It's like being lead on and shot in the head at the same time lol.

Don't need closure I guess.

Just one question I really want answered. WHAT DO I DO NOW?!!!! I mean in life. Not with her.

 

[Stanfi]

Just one question I really want answered. WHAT DO I DO NOW?!!!! I mean in life. Not with her.

Serve God, put Him first, and he will fill in the rest.

 

[looksgood]

Serve God, put Him first, and he will fill in the rest.

LOL, check and check. Thing is I have no goals or dreams in life. I could get a house, but why? I could do a lot of things. But none mean anything to me. All I really want is to be able to share these things with someone else.

To serve God and put Him first is granted and without question to me. I been through enough to know that no matter what I don't get in life I still want God in my life more than it all.

But ya know I feel about like the woman in the song of soloman. I kept everyone elses garden but my own I have not kept. Meaning I got nothing of my own.

Oh well. Life is like that. I always been strong. And will continue. I just never faced this before. But I have moved from thinking of her to thinking of my own life.

 

[KeilCoppes]

LOL, check and check. Thing is I have no goals or dreams in life. I could get a house, but why? I could do a lot of things. But none mean anything to me. All I really want is to be able to share these things with someone else.

You might ask yourself - what can you do that would do good for someone if you met them, and allow you to serve God better at the same time?

I have long wanted to share, as you have, but God only gives the gift of time once. Once the time is gone you don't get it back, particularly with applying effort to life, to saving, to wise decisions that make a difference in the future. If you waste the time, you're also wasting the gift that you might be able to give to someone someday. If you invest in yourself, you may well be giving the gift of a distinguished, accomplished, wise, and prosperous husband someday.

-kc

 

[smash_kate]

Be thankful

 

[Mr.Cheese]

Just walk away.

 

[ebd]

To serve God and put Him first is granted and without question to me. I been through enough to know that no matter what I don't get in life I still want God in my life more than it all.

But ya know I feel about like the woman in the song of soloman. I kept everyone elses garden but my own I have not kept. Meaning I got nothing of my own.

Oh well. Life is like that. I always been strong. And will continue. I just never faced this before. But I have moved from thinking of her to thinking of my own life.

Sounds like you have already started moving on. Good for you! Maybe the right girl will be just 'round the corner!

ebd