Christian - Non-christian relationships

[WarriorOfGrace]

Hi
I'ld like to see what peoples think on the topic of a christian dating a non-christian. I know that some people feel that it is wrong, will other feel it is always okay, and others fell that is is permissible as long as it doesn't get in the way of your relationship with God. Any thoughts or comments on this topic would be apprieciated.
Thanks for your time.

 

[coastie]

I dated a non-Christian for a while, and I dated a Mormon for a while. Niether of which helped me get any closer to God, therefore, from personal experience I do not suggest if you desire to grow in your faith.

In addition, in the Bible it says "be not unequally yoked".

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

Originally posted by coastie
I dated a non-Christian for a while, and I dated a Mormon for a while. Niether of which helped me get any closer to God, therefore, from personal experience I do not suggest if you desire to grow in your faith.

In addition, in the Bible it says "be not unequally yoked".

I agree very much. The scripture referrenced is 2 Cor 6:14, 15
(NKJV) "Do not be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?"

(Amplified) "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a differnet yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living an dright standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and Belial [the devil]? Or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?

We don't have any particular feelings when we start out but then we start caring for that person, then we fall in love, then we start changing the Word to meet our circumstance and we decieve ourselves into thinking it's God's will, then we find ourselves in a mess and a relationship that does not honer God, ourselves, or the other person at all.

I come from the camp of: been there, done that, regretted that, repented of that and intend to never do that again.

When we dissobey what God says, it brings nothing but trouble.

 

[coastie]

Quaffer, your experience and wisdom speak volumes.

 

[Michie]

I do not think it wise to get into a romantic dating relationship with an unbeliever.

Scriptures tell us not to become unevenly yoked.

Alot of people make the mistake of thinking they can change the other person.

I know alot of unevenly yoked couples that wish they would have followed Scripture & avoided the heartache.

Because it brings on lots & lots of complications.

 

[seebs]

I think the advice about "unequally yoked" was more important in a society where believers and unbelievers were less able to coexist; in particular, I think it applies especially if they have very different views of what marriage implies. In the end, I think it's advice; it's not necessarily sinful to go against it, but it may not be the wisest thing. Exercise caution; interfaith relationships can be very hard.

 

[Blessed-one]

definitely... and God's not the head of the household in this kind of relationship.

 

[Dawn Marie]

What if you didn't know the person was a non-believer when you fell in love with them? Anyways, it doesn't matter... my boyfriend doesn't believe anything... I might as well join him...

 

[coastie]

Originally posted by XangelX
What if you didn't know the person was a non-believer when you fell in love with them? Anyways, it doesn't matter... my boyfriend doesn't believe anything... I might as well join him...

Personally, I couldn't truly love someone that didn't share the same fundamental beliefs as I. That is the making of a relationship where butting head will dominate.

That's kind of a non-chalant way of choosing to be an atheist. I think you're goign to want to give that a little more thought and prayer.

 

[SpiritPsalmist]

Originally posted by seebs
I think the advice about "unequally yoked" was more important in a society where believers and unbelievers were less able to coexist; in particular, I think it applies especially if they have very different views of what marriage implies. In the end, I think it's advice; it's not necessarily sinful to go against it, but it may not be the wisest thing. Exercise caution; interfaith relationships can be very hard.

Sorry seebs,

I could not disagree more strongly. 

The scripture is NOT mere advise.  The scripture is the voice of God, written down for us.  The scripure reveals the right way to go and it is expected as followers of Christ that we walk in it.  To do the opposite of what it says, is disobedience.

Think about it.  When you tell your children to walk down Church street because it is safer than Main Street, do you not expect that they do it?  Is it a suggestion? 

And if they go down Main St anyway, you understand they have dissobeyed, but what is it exactly that you understand about their dissobedience?  Perhaps that they believe they know better than you.

I believe when we deliberately disobey God, that is what we are saying to Him.  "You don't know what I need God".  "I know better than You what I need God". 

We would not dare say that with our mouths but yet seem to have no qualms about saying it with our actions. 

 

[Lbiagm]

I think a christian should not date a non-christian cuz it might cause the christian to have problems with them such as them trying to convert the christian. dating a christian as a christian would be a whole lot better.

 

[nickyandersonuk]

Interesting debate:

Dating a follower of Jesus can be just has hard and somone that doesn't follow Jesus.

I have many friends that follow Jesus who have dated non christian and have gone on to marry and thier no christian partner has decided to follow Jesus.

I think it can pose problem if you bible bash your partner what i think happens is man finds women man falls in love with women man has a great idea that the women will follow Jesus man starts preaching to women. Women don't want to listen has she is fine by herself man dosn't agree an proceeds to force his belief on the women and all ends in tears.


Now on the other hand a follower of Jeus finds a non follower and just accepts her for who she is and what she beliefs, he loves her , protects, comforts her, leads provides a strength to her. the non follower of Jesus is introduced to Jesus through his actions and want to be like Jesus.

So for me it depends on the Maturity and Zealousness fo the Follower of Jesus.

Blessings to all from the follower of Jesus

 

[nickyandersonuk]

Interesting I thought i posted a reply in this but may be not

I know believers that have married non believers and all went well both grew up to knowing the Lord

I also know believers that have had a dreadfull time.

The reality has to be in Christ,

I think the being unequally yoke scripture is advice rather than a command, and that its not neccessary wrong in God,s eyes because the same scripture says its ok to stay married to an unbelieving husband and that by your love and devotion to God you may win your husband over.

That to me is the key believers go into these relationships but they tend to bible bash thier partners which dosn't help anything. The ones that just let the love of God shine in them tend to win ther unbeliever over Gracious actions speak louder than words.

God Bless

Nicky

 

[happy]

I don't think it is a wise choice to be with non-believers.  Personal short story.  Before I gave my life over to Jesus I lived a homosexual lifestyle.  I met this girl at work (who is Christian) and took a big interest in her.  Partly because of her relationship with Jesus and partly because " I wanted her".  She "preached" to me but I wasn't listening.  She backslid and I got her into the homosexual lifestyle. (Keep in mind that she had not had any feelings toward women other than me)  She was tormented about backsliding but I didn't care.  Some one must have prayed for us (could have been her) because I woke up with the thought in my mind "how could I have taken a child away from God".  All that time, we did nothing but argue and fight.  I became bitter towards her.  Currently, I am happy to say that I have no interest in the homosexual lifestyle.  I am still ashamed of what I did to God.  Me and God had many discussions over it and well He won.  I have given my life over to Him completely and the other girl is back on track.  Her and I still talk and are friends but as sisters in Christ