Christian geisha?

[catofhope]

Okay in another thread or two it was mentioned by a couple of guys they would like a Christian geisha.
I realized it was possibly mentioned more in jest or NOT.

Geisha - "a Japanese woman trained to entertain men with conversation and singing and dancing"
And sometimes it does (but not always) include sex.

So what is it that appeals to you guys about this?
Is it the old saying about wanting a proper lady in public but a wild women in the bedroom?

Or is it just you want someone to entertain you with decent conversation...
and maybe singing and dancing and humor?

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

It was more of a flight of fancy----or was it.

I was intrigues by what happened to a Christian biker buddy of mine. About 4 years ago he go on a Christian singles sight from all over the world. He stayed on quite awhile and didn't really connect with anyone. He was about to cancel his account and as after thought he contacts a lady from the Philippines. She had her own successful business in computers (I think it was) and was just curious about the thought of getting married. Well long story short. They connected. He went to see her and stayed about a month and came back with a bride. He is the happiest I've seen him in a long time. Their society caters to the men and him being a Christian she was enthralled. She mothers and loves him and he loves her. She even cuts his meat sometimes and gives him baths and..................well anyway it sound very intriguing.

I think guys my age and older (I'm going to be 62) really want it to be like it was in the 50's with the traditional marriages. Not all guys my age are like that but a lot of them are.

 

[catofhope]

I'd love to be able to spoil someone.

 

[covenantwmn]

I would too, but would appreciate the same in return......is there such things as male giesha's???

 

[dluvs2trvl]

It was more of a flight of fancy----or was it.

I was intrigues by what happened to a Christian biker buddy of mine. About 4 years ago he go on a Christian singles sight from all over the world. He stayed on quite awhile and didn't really connect with anyone. He was about to cancel his account and as after thought he contacts a lady from the Philippines. She had her own successful business in computers (I think it was) and was just curious about the thought of getting married. Well long story short. They connected. He went to see her and stayed about a month and came back with a bride. He is the happiest I've seen him in a long time. Their society caters to the men and him being a Christian she was enthralled. She mothers and loves him and he loves her. She even cuts his meat sometimes and gives him baths and..................well anyway it sound very intriguing.

I think guys my age and older (I'm going to be 62) really want it to be like it was in the 50's with the traditional marriages. Not all guys my age are like that but a lot of them are.

And what does he do in return to spoil her? I'm all for spoiling someone and I love to do things for my special someone to show him how much I care for him...but I do think it is a give and take...so I'm just curious what your friend does in return for his wife lavishing so much attention on him.

I'm not trying to start a disagreement...I'm just offering a comment on the cutting his meat statement - that to me seems more like treating him like a child...I'm sorry that just seems WAY OVER THE TOP to me!!!

 

[catofhope]

I would too, but would appreciate the same in return......is there such things as male giesha's???

Closest thing would be a gigolo - but not really.
I agree the guy should willingly be doing for us too.

 

[KarrieTex]

Closest thing would be a gigolo - but not really.
I agree the guy should willingly be doing for us too.

After a read Memoirs of a Geisha and watching several segments on History Channel, I did some research.

Geisha's do entertain men but they also try to either become owner of a Okiya through inheirtance/adoption or to obtain a Danna which is a man who pays for their lifestyle. Geisha's in essence become mistress'. I read many accounts of different women who were on that path and the loneliness and loss of self in a man was heart breaking.

If there was a male counterpart I would not want it. I would rather have a man fulfilled in who he is and would want to spoil me not because of payment (yes Geisha's services are paid for) but because of want.

I also don't believe cartering to a man is a good thing as well. It builds nothing but a pseudo sense of self worth founded in a person and not who you are...most importantly who you are in Christ.

I am very glad to have known my grandmother's did not carter to a man but served their husbands and their husbands served them.

Our sermon today had one point that I believe stands out and can be applied. My pastor brought up all relationships should have unity, diversity, and maturity. I do not believe having a relationship like that applies to it.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

And what does he do in return to spoil her? I'm all for spoiling someone and I love to do things for my special someone to show him how much I care for him...but I do think it is a give and take...so I'm just curious what your friend does in return for his wife lavishing so much attention on him.

I'm not trying to start a disagreement...I'm just offering a comment on the cutting his meat statement - that to me seems more like treating him like a child...I'm sorry that just seems WAY OVER THE TOP to me!!!

It's reciprocal with him. He can't believed he's been so blessed that he does as much for her as she does for him. He told her that she didn't have to do it but she still does sometimes. Very lovingly to. It's wonderful to see them together. It's amazing to see how much he has progressed with ambition and Christian goals.They are so much in love. She doesn't want to give up the traditions she was raised with.

 

[KarrieTex]

And what does he do in return to spoil her? I'm all for spoiling someone and I love to do things for my special someone to show him how much I care for him...but I do think it is a give and take...so I'm just curious what your friend does in return for his wife lavishing so much attention on him.

I'm not trying to start a disagreement...I'm just offering a comment on the cutting his meat statement - that to me seems more like treating him like a child...I'm sorry that just seems WAY OVER THE TOP to me!!!

I agree with you and it alarms me.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

Oh I forgot. He's 55 and she's 35. The Filipino women focus less on looks and age and more on the person. As I said before they are a patriarchal society.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

It's reciprocal with him. He can't believed he's been so blessed that he does as much for her as she does for him. He told her that she didn't have to do it but she still does sometimes. Very lovingly to. It's wonderful to see them together. It's amazing to see how much he has progressed with ambition and Christian goals.They are so much in love. She doesn't want to give up the traditions she was raised with.

Then I think that is great! I also think that describing her as a Geisha implies that she is more of a servant than an equal in the relationship...and from what you've just described here sounds like a very loving, give and take relationships which is what everyone desires...how each couple expresses such loving gestures to each other can be very individual and unique...so what may seem loving to me and my special guy may seem over the top to another couple.

I also understand that it is a cultural thing with her...there are things mindsets that are very culture specific...and certain mindsets are very attractive to people.

Thanks for taking the time to explain what your friend does in return to show his wife his love for her.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

And what does he do in return to spoil her? I'm all for spoiling someone and I love to do things for my special someone to show him how much I care for him...but I do think it is a give and take...so I'm just curious what your friend does in return for his wife lavishing so much attention on him.

I'm not trying to start a disagreement...I'm just offering a comment on the cutting his meat statement - that to me seems more like treating him like a child...I'm sorry that just seems WAY OVER THE TOP to me!!!

I was referring to Filipino ladies and not Geishas. It's a fact of life and there are many men out there looking for oriental wives. The only problem is filtering out the ones that just want to divorce the men after they get citizenship or a passport and the ones that are for real.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I was referring to Filipino ladies and not Geishas. It's a fact of life and there are many men out there looking for oriental wives. The only problem is filtering out the ones that just want to divorce the men after they get citizenship or a passport and the ones that are for real.

Well, actually in another thread you did refer to wanting a Christian Geisha...so that is what I refering to...I should have clarified that you didn't mention it in this thread.

I understand from reading other threads you have posted in that you feel that American women do not and will not treat men in their lives in such a loving and caring way...however, I disagree...I think there are American women (myself included) who enjoy expressing their love in very caring and selfless ways...

How we (as individuals) express and receive love is soooo subjective that there really is no use in trying to define what is or isn't acceptable or loving...because what can be seen to you as a loving gesture may be viewed by another man as just ok...and the same with women...what I may see as loving another woman may see as nice...

If everyone gave and received love in the same way there wouldn't be all these people posting in CF looking for a relationship...yourself and myself included.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

As you say. It's all relative.

I didn't say that American women were not that way. I just said that many men are looking in the oriental direction or even Eastern European direction.. There might be a reason. Nez Pah?

 

[catofhope]

Thanks Radidio for clarifying the relationship you were speaking of.
Like dluv2trvl said it sounds like what we all want and is in line with Christian marriage.
I suspected your use of the term "geisha" was a little overboard.
And for everyone's peace of mind wanted to talk about it.

I have great examples in both my parents and paternal grandparents.
My grandparents are now dead but always did for each other.
My parents are still happily married now for over 45 years.
They still are lovey dovey walking hand in hand.
Cuddling together on the couch to watch television.
Okay its a little awkward.

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

Overboard?---I don't believe so--it was in reference to an ideology rather than an actual person.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

As you say. It's all relative.

I didn't say that American women were not that way. I just said that many men are looking in the oriental direction or even Eastern European direction.. There might be a reason. Nez Pah?

Well, I'm pretty sure that in other threads I have seen you mention that you don't think American women are as giving as Asian women...I apologize if that is incorrect.

Again, it is a very subjective thing and if you feel that it is best for you to look in the Asian or Eastern European direction then that is great for you...just like if other men want to do the same then it is great for them...

However, I do not believe it is a reflection on how women in America express their love to their special someone...and generalizations implied or otherwise are incorrect. Just as I'm sure that making the implication that all Asian and Eastern European women would express their love in the same way that your friends wife does is incorrect.

Yes, their are cultural histories however, each person is an individual and expresses love differently.

I really am not arguing with you Radidio, and I think you should search for love wherever you feel led to find it...and I pray that you do...really, I do...I think everyone deserves to be loved in the way that only a spouse can provide.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Overboard?---I don't believe so--it was in reference to an ideology rather than an actual person.

Whether it was a reference to an ideology or an actual person really doesn't make a difference....

And I thought you said earlier that you were referring to Filipino women not Geisha's????

I'm confused...

 

[C.F.W. Walther]

Well we all have opinions, but facts are facts. They are incontrovertible.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Well we all have opinions, but facts are facts. They are incontrovertible.

What facts are you referring to???

still confused...