Child Support Payments?

janman345 · Aug 16, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
Right. And please show me where that information is. Because my state, Washington state, has a different way of determining it.

I won't hold my breath, as you have a difficult time backing up whatever you say with actual evidence.

I wont go fishing for you, the feds dont enforce anything they simply come up with the total number from birth to 18 the states then come up with their own convoluded ways of determining award amounts and thoes methods are basicly extortion becuase thoes amounts often times exceed the recommended federal amount (especially if the man is a high wage earner). I dont have to back up anything for you, you ahve google and frankly your posts are offensive and you are not my friend so why would I go fishing for you.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 16, 2010

janman345 said:
I wont go fishing for you, the feds dont enforce anything they simply come up with the total number from birth to 18 the states then come up with their own convoluded ways of determining award amounts and thoes methods are basicly extortion becuase thoes amounts often times exceed the recommended federal amount (especially if the man is a high wage earner). I dont have to back up anything for you, you ahve google and frankly your posts are offensive and you are not my friend so why would I go fishing for you.

Once again, you've lived up to your reputation of not providing anything to back it up. Congratulations!

You make a claim and expect other people to find the evidence for you? That's just weak, man. And your claim for it being extortion beyond some random number you made up only shows your ignorance on the topic.

janman345 · Aug 16, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
Once again, you've lived up to your reputation of not providing anything to back it up. Congratulations!

You make a claim and expect other people to find the evidence for you? That's just weak, man. And your claim for it being extortion beyond some random number you made up only shows your ignorance on the topic.

Becasue you are not my friend and you post offensive snide sarcasitc posts is why I will not dig up the info for you, I dont have to prove anything, I already know that state child support is a racket. If you dont think so I dont care.

Even if I did pull it up you would post some double talk and more drivil, because once again you are not my friend and you come across as a hostile individual.

If you genuinly wanted the information you would have said wow thats interesting how did you find that. Your tone is all off, you need to start again.

Conservativation · Aug 16, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
No worries.

Having no experience, I don't know how you can make the judgement call that the system is badly perverse. I'm part of the system and I don't see what you're talking about.

Because I was almost part of it, and read a bunch of books, and researched the dog out of it online.

Go to Stephen Baskerville's web site...or read his book "Taken into Custody"

If you can resist the common urge to simply dismiss it as the stuff of bitter divorced men (In not one, nor is Baskerville) and you can follow his detailed footnotes to check references...you will see clearly

janman345 · Aug 16, 2010

I think big daddy needs to start over again and drop the attitude if he wants to be treated like an adult. I know people who have got burned BAD from CSED, they are an unregulated state racket.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 16, 2010

Conservativation said:
Because I was almost part of it, and read a bunch of books, and researched the dog out of it online.

Go to Stephen Baskerville's web site...or read his book "Taken into Custody"

If you can resist the common urge to simply dismiss it as the stuff of bitter divorced men (In not one, nor is Baskerville) and you can follow his detailed footnotes to check references...you will see clearly

I did check out Stephen Baskerville's web site. It's a government agency, so I would expect some abuses of the system. But being directly involved in 2 situations, I have not seen what you have claimed nor most of what Baskerville has charged. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, or can't happen. I'm just saying I haven't seen it. I don't like blanket statements that the system is badly perverse.

But at least you provided a reference for your claims! Kudos to you.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 16, 2010

janman345 said:
I think big daddy needs to start over again and drop the attitude if he wants to be treated like an adult. I know people who have got burned BAD from CSED, they are an unregulated state racket.

I think you need to read your Bible and get a Biblical understanding of things before you profess to know it all and clearly demonstrate a lack of understanding.

You can make all the false claims you want. We have freedom of speech in this country. More power to you.

janman345 · Aug 16, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
I think you need to read your Bible and get a Biblical understanding of things before you profess to know it all and clearly demonstrate a lack of understanding.

You can make all the false claims you want. We have freedom of speech in this country. More power to you.

I do read the bible and when you come across as snide and calus you will not get positive responses, thats why I say start again. Con no more backed up his statements than I did, all he said was he read some books and you took it upon yourself to research. So maybe you chose to start again with him and not me thats your choice and maybe you will get cons respect but not mine.

I know of TONS of cases where award amounts have far exceeded 300-400$/month and thats an abuse and a racket.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 17, 2010

janman345 said:
I do read the bible and when you come across as snide and calus you will not get positive responses, thats why I say start again. Con no more backed up his statements than I did, all he said was he read some books and you took it upon yourself to research. So maybe you chose to start again with him and not me thats your choice and maybe you will get cons respect but not mine.

I know of TONS of cases where award amounts have far exceeded 300-400$/month and thats an abuse and a racket.

Cons provided a specific author and cited his book. I looked it up. Easy enough.

You, my brother, have not cited your references to your claim that the feds came up with some formula. Nor have you provided proof that any amount above $300-400/mo is excessive, or "extortion" as you put it.

You are ignorant in the fact that it is the STATE'S right (not the federal govt.) to determine how child support is determined. In case you haven't been following the Obama health care debacle, that's the premise behind much of the uproar - it's the states right, not the feds, to determine such things. Both my wife and I followed that formula in our previous marriages, according to Washington state law.

In addition, you are ignorant in believing the one size fits all of $300-400/mo across the country. Do you not know about standards for costs of living? That is also a factor in determining amounts. $300 in rural Kansas provides for a whole lot more than $400 in LA or NYC. Lifestyle, multiple kids, special needs, etc. are other considerations.

It seems like you only believe what you read, and it appears that what you have read doesn't paint the whole picture of the situation. Having lived through it once, and observing my wife's situation, I have a different perspective than you do.

janman345 · Aug 17, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
Cons provided a specific author and cited his book. I looked it up. Easy enough.

You, my brother, have not cited your references to your claim that the feds came up with some formula. Nor have you provided proof that any amount above $300-400/mo is excessive, or "extortion" as you put it.

You are ignorant in the fact that it is the STATE'S right (not the federal govt.) to determine how child support is determined. In case you haven't been following the Obama health care debacle, that's the premise behind much of the uproar - it's the states right, not the feds, to determine such things. Both my wife and I followed that formula in our previous marriages, according to Washington state law.

In addition, you are ignorant in believing the one size fits all of $300-400/mo across the country. Do you not know about standards for costs of living? That is also a factor in determining amounts. $300 in rural Kansas provides for a whole lot more than $400 in LA or NYC. Lifestyle, multiple kids, special needs, etc. are other considerations.

It seems like you only believe what you read, and it appears that what you have read doesn't paint the whole picture of the situation. Having lived through it once, and observing my wife's situation, I have a different perspective than you do.

The bottom line is if you are leaving the father destitute what motivation does he have to work (other than under the table), thats what happens when you strong arm people into paying when they dont want to.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 17, 2010

janman345 said:
The bottom line is if you are leaving the father destitute what motivation does he have to work (other than under the table), thats what happens when you strong arm people into paying when they dont want to.

As opposed to leaving the woman destitute and responsible for raising the kids that the man helped create?? Nice! If they don't want to pay to help raise THEIR child, then they are worthless as men anyway.

Poverty statistics say that single mothers are the largest recipients of welfare and govt. subsidies. Where's the daddy?? Out messing around with another woman probably.

janman345 · Aug 17, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
As opposed to leaving the woman destitute and responsible for raising the kids that the man helped create?? Nice! If they don't want to pay to help raise THEIR child, then they are worthless as men anyway.

Poverty statistics say that single mothers are the largest recipients of welfare and govt. subsidies. Where's the daddy?? Out messing around with another woman probably.

Thats your opinion, why is the question never asked as to why they broke up to start with. I think that has a HUGE factor as to whether or not he is in fact a man even though he does not want to pay. Maybe he is out messing around .... because his babys mom pruded out on him or drove him away. You dont know the situation so why would you jump to conclusions. Just because a single mom is homeless or destitute does not mean she did not bring it on herself. I think single moms get way to much sympathy even if they were the ones to break the home apart through their own actions or inaction.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 17, 2010

janman345 said:
Thats your opinion, why is the question never asked as to why they broke up to start with. I think that has a HUGE factor as to whether or not he is in fact a man even though he does not want to pay. Maybe he is out messing around .... because his babys mom pruded out on him or drove him away. You dont know the situation so why would you jump to conclusions. Just because a single mom is homeless or destitute does not mean she did not bring it on herself. I think single moms get way to much sympathy even if they were the ones to break the home apart through their own actions or inaction.

All I can say is "Wow." It appears you are advocating the man not owning up to his responsibilities regardless of the reason they broke up, and that the destitute or homeless single mother deserves it. What compassion you have on your fellow human beings.

janman345 · Aug 17, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
All I can say is "Wow." It appears you are advocating the man not owning up to his responsibilities regardless of the reason they broke up, and that the destitute or homeless single mother deserves it. What compassion you have on your fellow human beings.

I dont hide behind the faucaud of compassion in order to allow theft and extortion. The reason for the break up has EVERYTHING to do with it. I think she should have minimal help through social programs so they dont die but if the husband was a doctor and SHE caused the break up she has no entitlement to his standard of living or even a piece of it and for the states to force that is extortion and to be extorting members of society that we really need in this crap economy (when some are leaving the country) is a terrible idea. If you go back to the OT many a nation fell from greed, extortion and theft.

Something is going to have to give in this country because people dont do MD's and engineering for free while their pay check is pilfered from them and when your productive members are unmotivated your country becomes the USSR. CSED is just one part, but a big part for thoes that are stuck in it.

JanniGirl · Aug 19, 2010

BigD,

I'll get back to your original post. I come from the perspective of a divorced mom who receives no support from her ex-H as we have joint custody of our 2 children. My current husband does pay child support (and maintenance, as well) for his daughter and his son lives with us. He has joint custody, too, of his daughter -- but still pays child support.

I'm highly concerned that your wife is taking money that should go towards your household and stockpiling it for "her kids". Especially if this is a new development. You guys need to talk and find something more reasonable than her keeping that money for her personal use while you pay for the living expenses for the whole family.

BigDaddy4 · Aug 23, 2010

JanniGirl said:
BigD,

I'll get back to your original post. I come from the perspective of a divorced mom who receives no support from her ex-H as we have joint custody of our 2 children. My current husband does pay child support (and maintenance, as well) for his daughter and his son lives with us. He has joint custody, too, of his daughter -- but still pays child support.

I'm highly concerned that your wife is taking money that should go towards your household and stockpiling it for "her kids". Especially if this is a new development. You guys need to talk and find something more reasonable than her keeping that money for her personal use while you pay for the living expenses for the whole family.

Thanks, JanniGirl. This is born out of her selfishness and need for control, things she says she will seek counseling for. We are working on the money issue, but it is a very sensitive issue. I'm praying that God will touch her heart and release her from the bondage of selfishness and give Jesus control of her life. I am fasting and praying for her this week.

JanniGirl · Aug 23, 2010

I'll pray for you guys. Is your wife christian?

BigDaddy4 · Aug 23, 2010

JanniGirl said:
I'll pray for you guys. Is your wife christian?

Thank you, I appreciate it! She says she is, but she is struggling spiritually with things like repentance, forgiveness, serving others, etc. so it's hard to tell. She goes to church, is involved in our Women's Ministry, and prays with our kids, but the fruits of the spirit just aren't there most of the time.

JanniGirl · Aug 24, 2010

BigD,

Right now, I'm kind of at a low point in my relationship with God (I'll confess this to you, here). I've faced some very personal and hurtful realities about my life, and when I looked around and tried to lean on God. He, seemingly, was not there.

I still acknowledge God as God and that Jesus died for our sins (including mine), but the "relationship" that had comforted me in the past is not present now. So, yes, I am a christian, though, at this point it is difficult to lean on God and to "trust in Him".

I share this, because, perhaps, your wife (while still a christian) is having a hard time with her relationship with God. It happens and is very difficult to deal with (causes me much heartache, I know).

Wishing you the best,

chaz345 · Aug 25, 2010

BigDaddy4 said:
As opposed to leaving the woman destitute and responsible for raising the kids that the man helped create?? Nice! If they don't want to pay to help raise THEIR child, then they are worthless as men anyway.

Poverty statistics say that single mothers are the largest recipients of welfare and govt. subsidies. Where's the daddy?? Out messing around with another woman probably.

Not necessarily. In fact I'd even say not usually. Sometimes? Of course. But let's try not to perpetuate the stereotype that most divorces are because the guy up and left or traded in his wife for a "newer model".

Child Support Payments?

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