Can Christians Divorce for Other Reasons than Adultery?

[The Narrow Way]

I believe that PHYSICAL & MENTAL ABUSE is grounds for divorce. I realize the Bible doesn't say that, but I believe the reason it doesn't say that is because it should be COMMON SENSE and NOT NEED to be said. I don't believe that God expects anyone to stay in an ABUSIVE relationship.

How many have committed SUICIDE because they saw NO WAY OUT of an ABUSIVE MARRIAGE???? Only ETERNITY will tell.

I don't believe people can get divorced for TRIVIAL things....but when there is REAL ABUSE, DIVORCE is many times the BEST OPTION.

Think of the example an abusive father or mother is to the children living in the home....and of the danger to those children....

 

[Rene Loup]

Scripture in question:

Adultery
27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

Divorce
31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

~Matthew 5:27-32 (NIV)

Here's other pieces of Scripture that needs to be taken into account within marriage:

19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

~Galatians 5:19-26 (NIV)

1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

~1 Corinthians 13 (NIV)

Instructions for Christian Households
18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

~Colossians 3:18-21 (NIV)

Instructions for Christian Households
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

~Ephesians 5:21-33 (NIV)

 

[trophy33]

Can Christians divorce, ever? Where does the New Testament allowed it for adultery?

 

[The Narrow Way]

Can Christians divorce, ever? Where does the New Testament allowed it for adultery?

Are you saying you don't believe divorce is permitted even if adultery is committed?

 

[trophy33]

Are you saying you don't believe divorce is permitted even if adultery is committed?

Just challenging the presupposition.

 

[Friedrich Rubinstein]

Can Christians divorce, ever? Where does the New Testament allowed it for adultery?

Mt 19:9.

 

[The Narrow Way]

The ORIGINAL plan was for husband & wife to get along and be happy all their lives, "till death." But, after sin came in....things changed. And in many cases, wives have been very abused (sometimes husbands, too).

Jesus Himself said, speaking of divorce ~

"But here is what I tell you. Anyone who divorces his wife causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who gets married to the divorced woman commits adultery. A man may divorce his wife only if she has not been faithful to him." Matthew 5:32
​

So, I think it's pretty clear that DIVORCE is APPROVED by Jesus Himself in the cases of ADULTERY.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

One has to consider the context of the "divorce" Scripture in Matthew. Jesus was answering a question put to Him by the Pharisees who were pressuring Him. He was showing a greater standard of righteousness than just by following the rules of the Law. His point was that unless we exceed the righteousness of the Pharisees (who made it a rule to follow the Law perfectly from their youth), we will not inherit the kingdom of God. The reaction from normal people is, "Who then can be saved?" Jesus' answer is, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

 

[The Narrow Way]

One has to consider the context of the "divorce" Scripture in Matthew. Jesus was answering a question put to Him by the Pharisees who were pressuring Him. He was showing a greater standard of righteousness than just by following the rules of the Law. His point was that unless we exceed the righteousness of the Pharisees (who made it a rule to follow the Law perfectly from their youth), we will not inherit the kingdom of God. The reaction from normal people is, "Who then can be saved?" Jesus' answer is, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

I don't follow you. Are you saying Jesus did not mean that DIVORCE was ACCEPTABLE if there had been ADULTERY?

 

[trophy33]

Mt 19:9.

I knew somebody will bring this one verse. Do you have another one? Because its not a good practice to base life decisions of many people on just one verse.

One verse can be badly preserved in manuscripts, wrongly translated, wrongly understood etc.

 

[Friedrich Rubinstein]

I knew somebody will bring this one verse. Do you have another one? Because its not a good practice to base life decisions of many people on just one verse.

One verse can be badly preserved in manuscripts, wrongly translated, wrongly understood etc.

Mt 5:32.

Also, "badly preserved in manuscripts" is a weak argument, as we have more than 25,000 manuscripts in various languages preserved. We are very well able to reconstruct the original text.

 

[trophy33]

Mt 5:32.

This verse is very similar to the first one, but with different words used:
λέγω δὲ ὑμῖν ὅτι ὃς ἂν ἀπολύσῃ τὴν γυναῖκα αὐτοῦ μὴ ἐπὶ πορνείᾳ καὶ γαμήσῃ ἄλλην μοιχᾶται.

Ἐγὼ δὲ λέγω ὑμῖν ὅτι πᾶς ὁ ἀπολύων τὴν γυναῖκα αὐτοῦ παρεκτὸς λόγου πορνείας ποιεῖ αὐτὴν μοιχευθῆναι

Which creates a question - are these two textual versions of the same thing? If its so, which one is correct? Or did Jesus tell it twice?

Also, "badly preserved in manuscripts" is a weak argument, as we have more than 25,000 manuscripts in various languages preserved. We are very well able to reconstruct the original text.

We have many verses we are not sure if they are right, because the oldest manuscripts disagree about them. You can check that in Greek editions, in textual notes.

 

[GreekOrthodox]

In the Orthodox church, we do have some additional clauses for divorce such as abuse, desertion, and imprisonment.

 

[The Narrow Way]

I've never been able to understand how some claim that DIVORCE is not ACCEPTABLE when Jesus Himself says it is, in cases of ADULTERY

But here is what I tell you. Anyone who divorces his wife causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who gets married to the divorced woman commits adultery. A man may divorce his wife only if she has not been faithful to him. Matthew 5:32.​

 

[trophy33]

I've never been able to understand how some claim that DIVORCE is not ACCEPTABLE when Jesus Himself says it is, in cases of ADULTERY

But here is what I tell you. Anyone who divorces his wife causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who gets married to the divorced woman commits adultery. A man may divorce his wife only if she has not been faithful to him. Matthew 5:32.​

We have even the third version of Jesus words, in Luke:
"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."
Lk 16:18

And the fourth in Mark:
He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.
Mk 10:11

So the situation is not so easy and clear as when somebody uses just Matthew's version.

 

[The Narrow Way]

We have even the third version of Jesus words, in Luke:
"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."
Lk 16:18

And the fourth in Mark:
He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.
Mk 10:11

And there is no exception, there. So the situation is not so easy.

You don't believe Mark cancels out Matthew, do you? Kind of like if you and I look at a picture, you see certain things and I see others....just because you don't see what I see, doesn't mean I didn't see them. Or if you and I listen to a sermon and I catch something you didn't here, doesn't mean I made them up....

BOTH MATTHEW and MARK and LUKE are ALL CORRECT....just different accounts of the SAME SERMON by Jesus that they were listening to.

 

[trophy33]

You don't believe Mark cancels out Matthew, do you? Kind of like if you and I look at a picture, you see certain things and I see others....just because you don't see what I see, doesn't mean I didn't see them. Or if you and I listen to a sermon and I catch something you didn't here, doesn't mean I made them up....

BOTH MATTHEW and MARK and LUKE are ALL CORRECT....just different accounts of the SAME SERMON by Jesus that they were listening to.

If they are 4 different accounts of the same sermon, we have a problem with preservation, then. Because all 4 are quite different.

If one goes with Matthew, he can divorce after adultery. If one goes with Luke, he cant.

And we are talking just about English versions. There are views that even Matthew does not allow divorce and it should be translated like "not even in case of adultery".

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

I don't follow you. Are you saying Jesus did not mean that DIVORCE was ACCEPTABLE if there had been ADULTERY?

I'm not saying that at all. What I am saying is that Jesus was answering a question put to Him by those who were opposing Him. He was showing that the righteousness required to be admitted to heaven is of a much higher standard than observance to the Mosaic Law. He is showing that just following the rules does not justify. It is what is in a person's heart that is crucial. A person can follow the moral law perfectly, but with a heart that is not right with God.

This means that a married man may be totally faithful to his wife as far as the moral law goes, but as Jesus said, if he just looks at another woman with lust (as all of us males do), then he has committed adultery in his heart, and this is the same according to Jesus as if he committed the actual act of adultery with the woman.

Therefore, every man who has ever looked at a woman with lust, has committed the act that would allow his wife to divorce him. The fact is, according to Jesus, looking at a woman with lust, and actually committing the act of adultery is the same.

What Jesus was saying to the Pharisees was that just because they thought they were perfect because they kept the Law without fault from their youth up, did not mean that they were justified before God. What is needed is a total transformation of the heart, and this is possible only through the finished work of Christ on the Cross and our faith and trust in Him to save us.

 

[The Narrow Way]

If they are 4 different accounts of the same sermon, we have a problem with preservation, then. Because all 4 are quite different.

If one goes with Matthew, he can divorce after adultery. If one goes with Luke, he cant.

And we are talking just about English versions. There are views that even Matthew does not allow divorce and it should be translated like "not even in case of adultery".

There is an easy solution to that...you just put them ALL TOGETHER.

Again, if there are 10 different people looking at a picture, you will get 10 different responses as to what they each saw....but that doesn't make ANY of them wrong... Putting them together will give you the BEST picture of the TRUTH.

 

[Lost4words]

Bad cooking can be a good grounds for divorce. As can not fetching slippers when asked!