Break ups...

[hugnluvable]

Hi there, I'm in a relationship that I feel God not wanting me to be in right now but I cant let go! I love my boyfriend to pieces and the last thing that I want to do is hurt him. He isnt a Christian and there'd be no way he'd understand my reasoning for the break up! Has anyone been through a similar situation? And how is it now without them? Does your relationship with God feel more fulfilling than it used to be? And was is easier than you expected once you held onto Jesus for help?


Thanks
Love, hugs and prayers
Erica
xxx

 

[wvmtnkid]

Hi Erica-

I understand something of what you are going through. Any break up is hard, but sometimes one of this nature seems harder because the non-Christian doesn't share the same point of reference that we as Christians have. It's hard for two Christians to break up when they feel God leading them in different directions and they understand the reason behind it. I think this is part of the lesson in the "being equally yoked" scripture.

The only thing I can reassure you in is that if you feel God leading you in this decision, you will not feel peace until you follow that lead. The thing about free will is that you can make you own decision and do what you want. I've done it. I've made the excuses and went ahead and done what I wanted to do, knowing it wasn't the right thing. It wasn't until after I tried things my way, that I realized that if I would have listened to God and did things His way, I could have saved myself alot of heartache. He doesn't ask us to do something that isn't for our own good. I know sometimes it may seem that way, especially when it involves our heart.

It's a tough decision. I pray that God will lead you into making the right one and give you the courage and strength to carry it through.

 

[Stanfi]

Hi Erica-

I understand something of what you are going through. Any break up is hard, but sometimes one of this nature seems harder because the non-Christian doesn't share the same point of reference that we as Christians have. It's hard for two Christians to break up when they feel God leading them in different directions and they understand the reason behind it. I think this is part of the lesson in the "being equally yoked" scripture.

The only thing I can reassure you in is that if you feel God leading you in this decision, you will not feel peace until you follow that lead. The thing about free will is that you can make you own decision and do what you want. I've done it. I've made the excuses and went ahead and done what I wanted to do, knowing it wasn't the right thing. It wasn't until after I tried things my way, that I realized that if I would have listened to God and did things His way, I could have saved myself alot of heartache. He doesn't ask us to do something that isn't for our own good. I know sometimes it may seem that way, especially when it involves our heart.

It's a tough decision. I pray that God will lead you into making the right one and give you the courage and strength to carry it through.

Again!! What she said!!! Thank you Lord, for the wisdom of wvmtnkid. I know some other people that I wish had this.

 

[desi]

The longer you wait the bigger the mess will be when the inevitable happens; or worse, you may commit yourself to a life of misery.

 

[goodgirl]

Hugnlovable, yes I've been there more than once (a bit thick-headed, haha). In my experience, I only did it correctly one time. The other times I just made up some other reason to end it. Not only did I feel dishonest but I also knew the guy didn't really buy my reasons, so I also hurt a couple of people more than necessary and caused them to question things about themselves that they didn't need to. Also, whatever the excuse was I always found myself in a situation later when that excuse wouldn't fly anymore -- thus leaving me open to more temptation and an on-and-off relationship. Ugh!

When I really did just say "look, as you know I'm a Christian and this relationship seems stuck against a glass ceiling so we might as well break up", the man was beautiful about it and actually we are closer friends now than before. He really respected my decision.

Finally, not only do I now feel closer to God, but I'm a TON happier and more secure. I feel like my last non-Christian boyfriend (the nice one) said things to me that God himself put in his mouth, to make me understand that I'm not a bad person for wanting to date only Christians. Also, having had just one BF since then -- a very devout Christian -- I am now truly and permanently spoiled ROTTEN. I didn't know what I was missing!