Biblical grounds for divorce?

[KJVisTruth]

"But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace." 1 Cor. 7:15

Chapter 7 spoke about marriage and a little about divorce. "Not under bondage", seems to me, means never been married in the eyes of God, because if s/he was a believer, a brother or a sister is under "bondage" of marriage commitments. Is this biblical grounds for a divorce? How about in the event of when someone ASKED the other to depart, and s/he departed voluntarily? Is that someone responsible and in that case, is a divorce unbiblical?

If you have a different interpretation of the verse, I am all ears.

I recall another verse about abandoning your spouse and then its biblical grounds for a divorce (not sure where to find this). Would appreciate it if somebody knew where and tell me. =)

Thanks in advance for any feedback.

 

[jessesgirl]

I agree. I see "not under bondage" as meaning not married in the eyes of God. I take it to mean that if the unbeliever was the one to make the efforts to end the marriage, then we as believers are "not under bondage" whether they told us to leave or not. I was the christian in my first marriage and I was the one who left, but my ex-husband left my marriage long before I packed up and moved out, so to me, I am not and was not bonded to him.

 

[imaniingod]

This is true, the spouse would no longer be under bondage.

 

[snowflake04]

In today's society you only need one signature for a divorce, so if you have done everything in your power to keep it together and she is a non-believer and is just going to leave you anyways, then i dont think you are under bondage. She has to be the one to serve divorce papers etc etc. You are the believer, and you aren't to leave under any circumstances except for adultery

 

[HuntingMan]

In today's society you only need one signature for a divorce, so if you have done everything in your power to keep it together and she is a non-believer and is just going to leave you anyways, then i dont think you are under bondage. She has to be the one to serve divorce papers etc etc. You are the believer, and you aren't to leave under any circumstances except for adultery

And what about being brutally raped every day by a husband ?
Does this woman just have to deal with it ?
What if he is abusing the children too ?

 

[snowflake04]

well im just speaking for the situation, which doesnt seem to be violent by any means, i suppose if children, and your own protection was involved then you would have to separate, even now i think married couples can separate without going against God.

 

[Brotherfromanothermother]

I'll use my own experience as an example....
Wife and I are both professing Christians but have
been unable to get along most of the entire time we've been
married (11 years this month) absolutely unable to
make a connection, faulty intimacy, you name it. As far as I know
there has been no adultery, no violence etc. No real "reason".
She feels like divorce is the only option and is pursuing
it as I write this. (we are now separated with NO chance
of reconciliation - I believe due to the place her heart is in)
I've tried to make it work and have stuck it out and have
asked the Lord for intervention, we've been to counseling
etc.
Someone suggested that she should be treated as an unbeliever
for her disobedience to the Gospel...
I've also read (on a Christian based website) that being
unwilling to meet you're spouses "needs" in a sense
constitutes abandonment and could be grounds for divorce.
I could easily "apply" that scripture to my situation or I
can do what I've done which is "hang on". Neither one
seems to play out favorably.

 

[okiemommy26]

My husband lied about being Christian and married me. He is the one that left me and the kids. I am Christian.

 

[deliciousBass]

My husband lied about being Christian and married me. He is the one that left me and the kids. I am Christian.

Okay, I know this is getting off topic here, but your CF character is rather attractive, okiemommy26. The candy cane, red high heels and red Mrs. Clause outfit go together oh so well.

Whew!

Now that I got that off my chest...most of the situations mentioned so far sound like they would be biblical grounds for divorce. I have to flat out disagree with this statement though:

You are the believer, and you aren't to leave under any circumstances except for adultery.

I think statements like that are easy to make when you're not on the receiving end of sexual, physical or emotional abuse. Besides that, the covenant of marriage can be broken in many ways besides sleeping with someone else. Just my 2 cents.

 

[Brotherfromanothermother]

Okay, I know this is getting off topic here, but your CF character is rather attractive, okiemommy26. The candy cane, red high heels and red Mrs. Clause outfit go together oh so well.
Whew!
Now that I got that off my chest

lol

 

[snowflake04]

well im sorry i guess i just can't agree with all this.. I'm in a terrible marriage with an extremely cold and mean husband, i suffer a lot of emotional abuse, and yet i have not left him because of these verses from 1 corinthians here, i really believe when answering these questions we should look to the bible since it would be very easy to justify leaving, for me too..

[10] And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
[11] But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
[12] But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
[13] And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.

These verses speak for themselves

 

[jessesgirl]

I was the Christian in my previous marriage and I was also the one who left due to emotional and physical abuse. I believe that my ex husband (who told me he was a Christian to date me) abandoned the marriage long before I left it. I also believe that God has blessed my second marriage and I am living in His will.

snowflake, if you are in that type of marriage and you feel a personal conviction to stay, that is your prerogative, but I felt no conviction whatsoever to stay. I had a hard time leaving because I felt like God would never forgive me but once I was reminded that we serve a loving and forgiving God that didn't want my life to end @ the hands of this man, I left and never looked back.

 

[jessesgirl]

In today's society you only need one signature for a divorce, so if you have done everything in your power to keep it together and she is a non-believer and is just going to leave you anyways, then i dont think you are under bondage. She has to be the one to serve divorce papers etc etc. You are the believer, and you aren't to leave under any circumstances except for adultery

My divorce required both signatures and so did several others that i know of. Some peoples' divorces drag on for months, even years because the other person can't be found to get the signature needed to proceed with the divorce.

 

[4Christ2]

I was in an abusive marriage and stayed in it for 25 years. Why? Because I was believer and I didn't want to disobey God. I was also afraid because I had made vows before God and man to my ex that I would love him until death and through....etc.

Because of the abuse, I did have to seek safety for myself and my children; so I did depart to a separate residence with my children. During the departures (there were 3 of them) I prayed to the Lord to change my ex and me so that we would have the type of marriage that glorifed Him. My ex did not change. I went back all three times I departed from him thinking he had...but it was all show and once back..the abuse would start again.

I still did not divorce him. I did not date, but acted as if I was still married to him during these separations. These separations were not short-term either...a total of five years out of the 25 we were husband and wife.

The last time I left, I know he knew he had really blown it. He filed for divorce and has since remarried.

Who do you believe was obedient to the Father? The one who said "I will not, but later repented and did as He was told?" Or, the one who said, "I will and did not do as his Father asked?" I plan to live out my days as a single woman as long as my ex is living. This is my own choice in following what I believe is a commandment from the Lord.

No, you cannot divorce. Separation (departing) may be an option - but only a period to pray for the Lord to change your husband. Then if your husband does not repent of his "hearthardiness" - let him file for divorce. You will have the Lord's approval - he will not!

It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God!