Better divorced that never married?

[BeautyForAshes]

Well at least that's what this article says. Since its about singles, I figured this would be something good to discuss.


Singled out by society's stare
USAToday
As soon as she turned 30, Michelle Horan was bombarded with questions: "Are you married?" (No.) "Have you ever been married?" (No.) "Well, why not? What's wrong with you?"

The interesting thing is, if she had answered "Yes" to question No. 2, "that would have been perfectly fine," says Horan, 36. "It wouldn't have warranted 'What's the matter with you?' " (Her interrogators would be relieved to hear that this Atlanta resident finally tied the knot six months ago.)

That's because these days, many experts and singles agree it's more socially acceptable to be divorced than single and never married. A generation ago, "divorce" started with a scarlet D and was seen as a shameful stain on a relationship résumé.

Read the rest of the article here...
http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2005-02-13-singles-and-society_x.htm

 

[goat37]

Well at least that's what this article says. Since its about singles, I figured this would be something good to discuss.



Singled out by society's stare
USAToday
As soon as she turned 30, Michelle Horan was bombarded with questions: "Are you married?" (No.) "Have you ever been married?" (No.) "Well, why not? What's wrong with you?"

The interesting thing is, if she had answered "Yes" to question No. 2, "that would have been perfectly fine," says Horan, 36. "It wouldn't have warranted 'What's the matter with you?' " (Her interrogators would be relieved to hear that this Atlanta resident finally tied the knot six months ago.)

That's because these days, many experts and singles agree it's more socially acceptable to be divorced than single and never married. A generation ago, "divorce" started with a scarlet D and was seen as a shameful stain on a relationship résumé.

Read the rest of the article here...
http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2005-02-13-singles-and-society_x.htm

It's funny how true this is... one of my good friends is a single 36 year old woman. Never been married, no kids... When she first told me this, that was my first thought: "What's wrong with you?!?!?!" It's sad, but it's true.

I don't think it's a bad thing, it's just shocking to see someone of that age that has never been married, in this world today. I know there is nothing wrong with her, and any guy would be lucky to have her (beautiful, smart, good career, wants to be a mom etc...) she just hasn't found the right one

 

[Sketcher]

This article shows that society has it backwards.

"There's this idea that if you married, even if you divorced, you're somehow considered an adult, and if you never married, you somehow evaded some responsibility,"

Which is totally wrong. In many cases, divorce is a sign that one or the other partner has been horribly irresponsible. Sometimes both.

 

[boilerblues]

I think it's much better to stay single than to be divorced. Divorced people have a lot of pain and a lot of baggage. those things can be healed, but I'm thinking that I'd rather spare myself the experience. Being single isn't bad, you have to learn how to be content there.

 

[woman.at.the.well]

Well at least that's what this article says. Since its about singles, I figured this would be something good to discuss.


Singled out by society's stare
USAToday
As soon as she turned 30, Michelle Horan was bombarded with questions: "Are you married?" (No.) "Have you ever been married?" (No.) "Well, why not? What's wrong with you?"

The interesting thing is, if she had answered "Yes" to question No. 2, "that would have been perfectly fine," says Horan, 36. "It wouldn't have warranted 'What's the matter with you?' " (Her interrogators would be relieved to hear that this Atlanta resident finally tied the knot six months ago.)

That's because these days, many experts and singles agree it's more socially acceptable to be divorced than single and never married. A generation ago, "divorce" started with a scarlet D and was seen as a shameful stain on a relationship résumé.

Read the rest of the article here...
http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2005-02-13-singles-and-society_x.htm

It just goes to show you how desensitized our society has become. It's sad but probably true.

 

[Princess Pea]

Would these be the same "experts and singles" who believe it's best to get that first sexual encounter out of the way well before the honeymoon, and to get lots of practice with someone you're not planning to marry, because otherwise your wedding night will be all awkward and embarrassing? If so, I don't really care what they think. Starter marriages, for Pete's sakes, and divorce being a sign that you're CAPABLE of commitment??? Yup, it's a broken world, all right.

 

[Blank123]

thats a pretty sad statement of society today

Personally I think I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life if getting married meant I'd have to eventually get a divorce. There's no way I'd ever want to put myself, or any possible kids I might have, through such a painful thing like divorce.

 

[fishstix]

I wouldn't place too much value on the opinion of a culture that also thinks it's a good idea to murder unborn babies etc. I'll take God's opinion on divorce over people's opinion any day.

 

[esseJ]

i'd rather stay single...

 

[Lia]

I wouldn't place too much value on the opinion of a culture that also thinks it's a good idea to murder unborn babies etc. I'll take God's opinion on divorce over people's opinion any day.

 

[Grunt]

In a society with a divorce rate of 50% (or more?), what else did you really expect?

 

[OhhJim]

I can see how in God's eyes, never married is better than divorced. Still, I'm glad I'm divorced, in some ways. For one, I know what I'm missing. Before I was married, I really didn't know what it was like to be married. Now that I do, it's so much easier to remain single, because I know that marriage ain't that great. I had some really crazy ideas about what it would be like to be married!

Staying married would be better, of course, but if I had to be single...

 

[Xen_Antares]

One of my best friends is like that, hes 40 never been married, not dating and has no children so automatically people think hes gay, I know him on a much more personal level and I know he's not gay hes just had some weird relationships with women in his past where theyve been to domineering over him, so he associates all women as being domineering and wants little to do with them, after the past couple of relationships Ive been in I am beginning to understand and agree.

 

[revelations12_12]

I am divorced... I wish I had never been married. I must say though I am happy for what I learned and I am a much wiser person, and will not make the same mistakes twice. I will be a much better partner, due to what I have learned, for someone in the future... that is if that falls in with Jesus' plan for me.

 

[BeautyForAshes]

Well, I can certainly attest to the whole "why aren't you married?" inquisition from people - strangers included! I'm 30, single, no kids, and upon hearing this, some people give me this look of pity as if I've just lost a my favorite pet. Or I get this look of *gasp! as if I have a communicable disease. lol

I'm so blessed to not have been married in my early/mid twenties because my maturity level was no where near the stage where it is today. At that age, I was still interested in "kickin' it, partying,". I was not too concerned with 'tending to bf, much less a husband.

I'm sure that if I had married then, I would be divorced my now.

 

[sweetlambofgod]

i'd rather be not married than divorced.

 

[JPPT1974]

I rather stay single and never married rather than divorce because I would be married for all the wrong reasons.

 

[Jon-Marc]

I have been twice married and divorced. I wish I had NEVER married. The first was NEVER faithful and cheated on me MANY times--including with my sister's husband. The second one CONSTANTLY criticized EVERYTHING I said and did. I could have saved myself a lot of pain and heartache had I stayed single. Being celibate would have been no problem just as it isn't now.

People marry for a lot of reasons that are wrong. One out of every two marriages ends in divorce.

 

[JPPT1974]

Unless you want to be like Liz Taylor or JLo and marry over & over again. Suggest that you don't want to marry for all the wrong reasons.