best way to deal with athiests?

[gusbus48]

It seems that everyone my age is an athiest. Not only that, but they try to shove their views down my throat.

I cant tell you how many have insulted me for what I believe in and insult God. They say more than hurtful things as though they are smart for not believing and I am just a sheep who cant shake the "lies and superstitions that I have been taught since childhood"

I try to tell them to leave me alone and/or ignore it, but then I get bottled anger.

I also try to explain that every christian has pondered about the validity of the stories in the Bible, and that he isnt superior or smarter than me for not believing. I try to explain that it is the MESSAGE that gets to me and teaches me to live a good life.

I almost want to call them ignorant and stupid for thinking they know me or for thinking not believing makes them better.

How should I handle this? I am definitely a leader amongst the kids at my college being a football player etc, and I want to handle this the right way.

 

[E.C.]

How many times in the Gospels did Christ say to love your enemies and to PRAY for them?


As an ex-Atheist I will say that what turns of most people about Christians is judgmentalism. As Christians we are supposed to know how to live like God intended and to do so by example. Part of it is also because many Christians shove their own views down the throats of others and take the view of "if you don't go to my church than you're not Christian".

Christians forget that the job of judgment goes to God and not to us and because of that many people try to shove things down the throats of Atheists without practicing what they preach.

Respect their unbelief and respect them as people. Take the "love the sinner hate the sin" approach.

I find that when it comes to religion the best thing to do is to shut up unless asked a question.

 

[mandyangel]

i can so relate to this. i know many atheists and i wouldn't have a problem with them and i do pray for them and thats all great. but i cannot stand the constat shoving down of my throat they try to push their beliefs on me. its constant- and think im so stupid for accept God as my savior.

it becomes hard to stay friends even though i think of myself as a pretty friendly person but its just downright rude some of the stuff they say about me.

i do pray for them, but i also dont shove down Christianity to them. I don't even understand atheism, it seems its not even about them personally believing theres no god but they want to make sure everybody else they know thinks it too.

annoying

 

[citizenthom]

There is no point in engaging an atheist you do not know very well on intellectual topics. Atheists on college campuses are mostly "followers"--they feel highly justified because most of their professors, who after all must automatically be smart because of the paper on their walls, agree with them. You cannot overcome that kind of ethos from the position of a stranger; trying to convince them of anything out of nowhere would be like one of those professors trying to convince you the Bible is 100% wrong.

Instead, relate to them on a personal level, through shared interests. Let them see your character, what is different about you. Make friends with them. Don't take their disagreements with you personally; and when they make hostile generalizations about Christians that are not true, you will be able to say, "but I don't do/believe X, Y, and Z" (assuming you don't).

If you cannot do this, though--if their rhetoric gets your blood boiling uncontrollably--then ministering to them may not be something you are called to do. If that is the case do not feel obliged to try; just let them see you "live it out" from a distance.

 

[Fatally.Yours]

Be nice. Don't be afraid of us, we don't bite. Try and make friends with atheists who enjoy the same things as you.
Personally I don't have any Christian friends because most Christians don't enjoy the same activities as I do, they tend to be offended by me and I feel awkward around them, but that's the best way to approach atheists if you happen to have common interests.

 

[gusbus48]

i can so relate to this. i know many atheists and i wouldn't have a problem with them and i do pray for them and thats all great. but i cannot stand the constat shoving down of my throat they try to push their beliefs on me. its constant- and think im so stupid for accept God as my savior.

it becomes hard to stay friends even though i think of myself as a pretty friendly person but its just downright rude some of the stuff they say about me.

i do pray for them, but i also dont shove down Christianity to them. I don't even understand atheism, it seems its not even about them personally believing theres no god but they want to make sure everybody else they know thinks it too.

annoying

thats what im trying to get at. of course i dont shove my views down their throat. when they say insulting rude things i try to make THEM understand. most of the time they just dont want to

i think part of them trying to "make sure everybody else they know thinks it too" is because they came to the conclusion that thetre is no God by looking at science--the big bang, evolution etc so they feel like they are smarter than christians for thinking this. idk maybe not

There is no point in engaging an atheist you do not know very well on intellectual topics. Atheists on college campuses are mostly "followers"--they feel highly justified because most of their professors, who after all must automatically be smart because of the paper on their walls, agree with them. You cannot overcome that kind of ethos from the position of a stranger; trying to convince them of anything out of nowhere would be like one of those professors trying to convince you the Bible is 100% wrong.

Instead, relate to them on a personal level, through shared interests. Let them see your character, what is different about you. Make friends with them. Don't take their disagreements with you personally; and when they make hostile generalizations about Christians that are not true, you will be able to say, "but I don't do/believe X, Y, and Z" (assuming you don't).

If you cannot do this, though--if their rhetoric gets your blood boiling uncontrollably--then ministering to them may not be something you are called to do. If that is the case do not feel obliged to try; just let them see you "live it out" from a distance.

my blood does boil lol, its because they make it so much of a personal thing as in "youre stupid because you believe..."

ill try though

Be nice. Don't be afraid of us, we don't bite. Try and make friends with atheists who enjoy the same things as you.
Personally I don't have any Christian friends because most Christians don't enjoy the same activities as I do, they tend to be offended by me and I feel awkward around them, but that's the best way to approach atheists if you happen to have common interests.

im friends with tons of athiests lol. i dont constrict who im friends with to just christians, most of the time i dont know what someone believes about faith. its when someone i know says that they are smart for not believing and i am dumb, as though ive never thought about things like "did Jesus really do those things?". they think i just blindly believe because thats what i was taught and im stupid. so when its like that, they ARENT friendly and its tough.



i like the same things any kid my age does. i played football for 12 years, video games sam music etc. i just recently got more into christianity. most of the time people dont even know, were the same.

 

[Annmarie Raite]

Honestly, I know where you are coming from. My boyfriend and I have very different view points on religion. While I am still seeking and learning, he believes he knows everything and isn't afraid to launch into a lecture on why he is right.

What do I do when he does this? I listen and remember that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and realize that how someone feels today is not necessarily how they will feel tomorrow. It takes time to open yourself up, and for others it takes longer.

I just know that I try not to let him influence me and I keep strong with my beliefs and what I am focused on learning.

 

[emmzee]

gusbus48, I recommend a book called Tactics by Gregory Koukl which will help you talk about your faith without feeling overwhelmed. There are some free resources available on Stand to Reason's website Stand to Reason: Stand to Reason: Equipping Christian Ambassadors with Knowledge, Wisdom, and Character. but the book is a succinct summary. The "tactics" described in the book aren't meant as tricks or something, they are just ways to respond more winsomely in discussions with those whose beliefs differ from yours ... especially if they are pushy/hostile/etc.

 

[autumnfallsdown]

gusbus48 - I understand how you feel. Some atheists ( and I say some because there are a large majority who are not this way ) act the way you are describing and it is frustrating! I would prefer to just not talk about religion with them because I'm not too comfortable talking about it, but some just won't give up!

On the other hand, my best friend is an atheist. We are both very respectful of each other's beliefs and that's why it works out so well.

 

[crotchet]

Among certain intellectual circles, disbelief is a test of wisdom. This is the way it's been for a long time. If these people claim to be your friends, they're obviously not. They sound like jerks, to be frank. I've always found that with my friends, I want to explain things to them, share with them, and open their mind to things besides Christianity but going about it arrogantly doesn't get me anywhere.

As far as "dealing" with them. Just talk to them about the fact that you are firmly entrenched in your beliefs, and acknowledge that they are too. Then ask them if you guys can mutually get over that difference and be friends.

If you are going to be a Christian, expect persecution.

 

[Candide]

Love them without an agenda, genuinely listen to them and give thought to their opinions.

 

[ElijahW]

First thing would be to recognize where they are right and then educate yourself so they aren’t. If they are correct and you are holding onto the superstitions of childhood in regards to God and Christianity, then you are going to continue to be schooled by non believers. If you do educate yourself and evolve your understanding of God and what Jesus was doing; you will quickly come to the realization that none of the atheists you are talking to have educated themselves on the subject.

Second is to recognize and address when you are dealing with an atheist and when you are dealing with an anti-theist. If they are coming up to you and trying to deconvert you, it is more than likely they are doing it because they are anti-theists and see religion as the world problem that they are trying to fix and bring about the salvation of mankind.

The average skeptic isn’t going to like being understood as being part of an ideological movement trying to fix the world because that looks exactly like a religion. That’s why you need to be clear that it isn’t intended to be an insult but intended to find the common ground between you two. You both are working to fix the world but see the solution to our problems differently.

Being able to defend your beliefs rationally is the first line of defense but being able to question them about what their solution looks like, takes them out of the offensive and puts them on defense. Most skeptics have never really looked at their beliefs or where they come from. They just imitate the behavior of the skeptics they were raised around. (That’s probably not something to mention since they live by the notion that they are free thinking rational individuals.)

 

[branchofthevine]

Here is some advice I've learned when dealing with Atheists who basically attack you.

Thank them for their insults. It throws them off big time. Don't react in anger, but in humility thinking them better than yourself. Stand firm in your beliefs, but don't shove it down their throats, but don't retaliate if they mock you, and when they are in need be there for them. Rejoice under the suffering of their mocking and through that they will see Christ. Be ready to help them always as well.

 

[Warren Clark]

It seems that everyone my age is an athiest. Not only that, but they try to shove their views down my throat.

I cant tell you how many have insulted me for what I believe in and insult God. They say more than hurtful things as though they are smart for not believing and I am just a sheep who cant shake the "lies and superstitions that I have been taught since childhood"

I try to tell them to leave me alone and/or ignore it, but then I get bottled anger.

I also try to explain that every christian has pondered about the validity of the stories in the Bible, and that he isnt superior or smarter than me for not believing. I try to explain that it is the MESSAGE that gets to me and teaches me to live a good life.

I almost want to call them ignorant and stupid for thinking they know me or for thinking not believing makes them better.

How should I handle this? I am definitely a leader amongst the kids at my college being a football player etc, and I want to handle this the right way.

Well I don't believe your peers are taking a good appraoch. However they are not the only ones to blame.
Atheist have been under attack by the church from the beginning.
I feel bad for anyone that feels the need to shove anything down anyones throughts.
My motto is "live and let live", for the most part.
Its part of the reason why I chose to stick with Humanism.

As one of my role models, Richard Dawkins has a view similiar to mine regaurding religion.
He hates that people don't think for themselves and stick to studying the first thing that falls in their lap.
He doesn't mind people being religious its when it causes wars and disagreements in politics and science.
If believing in God helps you, that is a great and I am happy for you.
No one should be inserting their religion in anyone's lives.


To arise above anyone that tries to make you feel bad, just tell them that it isn't neccessary to criticize others for their beliefs.
just let them know that "it helps me" get through life, or whatever have you.

I am borderlined atheist. The only thing that keeps me from being complete atheist is my pondering of natural laws like gravity. So I concider myself a naturalistic pantheist.
I get alot of crap about going to hell from Christians, so I understand where some atheists are coming from. I just don't see the use in shoving any theism down anyone's throat.

 

[hollyda]

Here is some advice I've learned when dealing with Atheists who basically attack you.

Thank them for their insults. It throws them off big time. Don't react in anger, but in humility thinking them better than yourself. Stand firm in your beliefs, but don't shove it down their throats, but don't retaliate if they mock you, and when they are in need be there for them. Rejoice under the suffering of their mocking and through that they will see Christ. Be ready to help them always as well.

The next time a Christian tells me I'm evil and going to burn in Hell for all eternity, I am so going to say, "Thank you for being so kind! Have a fantastic day!"

 

[Cremealamenthe]

I know a few Christians do the same thing to me. I know that not all Christians are like this, I am not ignorant. But not all atheists are like this either, which I'm sure you know. My best advice is to not argue about religion, or even bring it up at all. Find common interests you have that don't involve religion. Instead of arguing, tell them you accept their choices and ask them to accept yours.
Hope I helped!

 

[TheApostleJohn]

It depends on the person's motivation. If he genuinely wants to know why you believe in God and is not just being argumentative, then tell him. If he just wants to be a pain, ask him why he wants to talk to you about religion. I do that any time I get trouble from anyone. That usually shuts people up. You're not going to win someone to Christ with apologetics anyway. Certainly not if the other person doesn't have an open mind and just wants to argue.

 

[StevenCB]

I will throw in my .02 and while I am still young and immature I think it will be worth reading.

All I have to say is. 1 Corinthians 13 4-7 (surrounding verses as well). This is what we are called to be. Love the people who hate you and they will not be able to stop themselves from seeing something different in you. This is how you should approach them. Love the heck out of them. Christ died for you and I while we were still spitting in his face. It's really the very least we can give back to a broken dying world.

 

[Alyssabee10]

I know this post is kind of old, but I am really glad I discovered this post. I have a few atheists friends as well, and I always feel as if they consider me stupid, even though they have never said that, just because I do have faith and believe in God. I know that all atheists aren't like that, where they shove their "beliefs" down Christians throats, but I just wish they would realize that they are doing the same exact thing they say they hate about us Christians. I feel like I am just growing up(mind you I am 19, going on 20 and in college as well) in the wrong time period, believe anymore. Or maybe i am just looking in all the wrong places.

 

[OzPants]

I have a friend that seriously calls God the 'Space Ghost' and is most definitely non religious. I know that the words can be offending especially when they make it personal, but my advice is to tell them " Look I understand how you feel, but I don't cram my beliefs down your throat. I would appreciate it if you would show me the same respect."

If they can't show you the same respect, than they are your true friends.