Bad Temper in a Dream

[dhatura]

I had this dream during a mid-day nap and became very bothered.
I was walking back home and suddenly I lost my purse. I chased after a bicycle and got it back from its backseat. I apologized politely to the bicycle rider for disturbing her and explained that I put my purse on her backseat. The bicycle rider then suddenly started accusing me of walking on the (wrong) outer circle and blocking traffic. I then lost my temper and started cursing her for being bossy. I chased after her and threw something at her out of anger.
After waking up, I felt very bothered because I know I have a bad temper and often hurt people intimate to me. I'd like to change that and having been working on it without much improvement. What does the dream mean for me? I feel very worried about my bad temper after waking up.

 

[Peripatetic]

I've done some awful things in dreams. When I woke up, I was thankful that they didn't really happen, and also thankful that I understood how wrong my dream-self's actions were. Dreams can call our attention to things sometimes, but we should not feel any guilt or personal accountability for them.

 

[parsley]

While you are resting, your brain organizes memories, establishes connections, and tries to resolve things. In the daytime we have things that disturb us that we don't resolve, and sometimes can't. The brain tries to make sense of it and find solutions.

You know that you have a temper, but this dream also shows some reasons behind your reactions. You were blamed for something you didn't do -- the person misunderstood you.

In the beginning you were the victim, not the one to blame. You had lost your purse and needed help.

When you found your valuables, there was still no one to help you -- instead, the person with the advantage retaliated.
But then you retaliated back.

Jesus teaches us to pray for those who persecute us, go the second mile, let our kindness shock people like hot coals. Still, Jesus set an example of standing up for what's right, and not letting oppressors take advantage of others.

In your dream you were so frustrated that you became the aggressor. It was like you tried everything you could to make people understand your situation, and no one cared or made an effort to understand... so you just had to express it physically.

But we all know that throwing things at people doesn't lead toward friendships and kindness. Your brain --and God-- were allowing you to see these types of situations more clearly.

The rider's accusation was legalistic. They were more concerned about rules than suffering. They had the advantage of being on a bike, which put them in more control and allowed them to speed ahead faster.

Think about whether there are people at church who seem to have an advantage and approval to lead... and when they are in this position, they trample the people they are supposed to help. A person finally gets up the gumption to ask for help from their church, and a lay leader comes back at them with criticism. As though they are better, just for being in charge.

If you had a similar incident (or many) anywhere -- work, school, family, friends... then lay the situation in the hands of Jesus. Give it up to Him. Give up your rights to retaliate, your rights to stay angry at the person, your fears of never getting enough respect from others.

Choosing to forgive will set you free. You can still stand behind what is right, and keep your shoulders squared, but also be mature enough to rise above what others want to do to you. Be the one who does not flinch when threatened.

Picture how heros of action movies keep a straight face in danger. They are thinking... planning their next moves... using the time for strategy instead of shouting "hey no fair." They know life is not fair, and people are fickle... but they work around it.

I just heard some great advice -- think of yourself like a boat, and the criticism of others like water that tries to seep in and sink you. The water can't sink you if it can't get inside, so don't let criticism get inside you...let it stay out in the vast ocean where it will disappear.

He surrounds the righteous with favor, like a shield.

Psalms 5:12