Baby Name Woes

[jazzbird]

So our friends had their baby today. They found out it was a girl at 20 weeks and chose a name shortly after, but kept it a secret.

Their DD's name is Elayna. The name we've chosen for a girl (if we have a girl) is Elaine. I am really disappointed. Our kids will be growing up together. Their birthdays will be a few weeks apart. We attend the same church and have the same group of friends. We see each other a few times a week. I feel kinda weird naming our child something that is SO similar.

They've probably been hoping all along that we're having a boy because they've known about our name choice since January.

Am I just being hormonal? I really haven't been at all moody this pregnancy, but maybe I'm making this a bigger deal than it is. We don't even know what we are having, so it may not be an issue whatsoever.

Elaine is my grandma's name, so even though we have another girl's name that we were considering and both really like, I feel that it would be a disappointment to my grandma if we changed it - even if we used her name as a middle name. I didn't even realize that grandma knew about our name choices, but my mom told me today that she had told her about them because she thought it would make her happy to know that we wanted to name the baby after her. Next time, I don't think we will tell anyone about our names.

So, is this a big deal? Should we just stick with our original intention or would you go with plan B? I'm just bummed.

 

[Linnis]

Name your daughter the agreed apon name.

I think I'd be upset too if I had a name picked out and someone had a baby a few weeks ahead of me and "took" the name. I don't know if you are a hormonal pregnant woman because I am.

The spellings are different and it's not quite the same.

 

[jgonz]

You could use Elaine as a middle name instead if it bothers you too much to go ahead and use it for a first name. That way your Grama won't be disappointed....

I would be ticked off too, and do Not think you're just being hormonal. We had something similar happen several years ago, but we ended up having a boy so the name issue wasn't an issue. But still! ugh

 

[~Mrs. A2J~]

Use the name you like. It's not like you're family so will even always have contact with them. Who knows where everyone will be in 5 or 10 years time. They knew your name choice well in advance so if they had a prob with it they should have spoken up already. So as it stands I would go with your original name choice. Besides, there are enough nick names for those names to have a different one for each girl should there be any problems.

 

[Leanna]

Awww, I wonder if it tore them up to pick it. I remember my sister in law was due a month ahead of me and I was sooooo nervous she would take our name that we had chosen months earlier (ours was a secret and we didn't tell anyone). I think how you are feeling is normal, but like Linnis said it is different enough. Elayna and Elaine can be friends without too much confusion.

 

[RoseofLima]

You could call her by her middle name. My husband is John PAtrick--but has always been called Patrick.

 

[katelyn]

In our family we have cousins who are maybe 6 months apart and their names are very similar - in fact, only one letter different in spelling (but different pronunciations). The grandparents bemoaned this for a while as being confusing, but everyone got used to it and the girls don't seem to mind at all. They are really good friends.

 

[nursejess]

Growing up, my best friend and I had the same name, it wasn't a problem at all. Our moms didn't know each other when they named us, but we were friends since I was a year old. We still are.

 

[jazzbird]

I guess I just feel a bit possessive over our names - especially since I'm really close to my Grandma. One aspect of naming children that has always been important to me is that we choose uncommon names - not weird, just not a name that other kids in their class are likely to have. But what can you do, right? It doesn't have to be a big deal. I'm just hoping that they don't plan on calling her by the nickname we've chosen. If that's the case, then I think we may go with our second choice name....I don't know.

Thanks for the input.

 

[christiankate]

I'm not pregnant.... however I would be upset also. They might end up calling her layne.... who knows? But I would stick with what you have... I know its so upsetting... then people think you copied "them".... grrr It's a tough situation.... whatever makes you most comfortable... Good luck and god bless, Kate

 

[Athene]

Stick with the name you've got, your friend doesn't have copyright protection over it or any variations of it.

 

[lin1235]

I don't think you should change your name choice because there's a decent chance she'll have a friend with a similar name! The connection with your grandma will be much more important, I think.