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Anybody else angry at the lack of support?
- Thread starter eyzonthepriz
- Start date
BobW188
Growling Maverick
No, I'm not angry at any lack of support. If I were going to be angry, it'd be with myself for not reaching out for the support that was one phone call away until it was almost too late.
God has provided you with A. A., detox and treatment centers, counsellors, therapists, doctors and (perhaps not least) this thread. But you have to reach out. I'm fond of saying that we regulars here have well over a century of cumulative sobriety; and I'll state confidently that not one of us got it simply by sitting there waiting for God to do all the work.
We A.A.s like to say, "The elevator to sobriety is broken. You have to use the steps." My first recommendation is that, after reading this and whatever other replies have been posted, you call your local A. A. number at once. I did, had my last drink about 20 hours later, was in detox by the 21st, and at my first meeting within two days. It was a rough road at first; but it's been well worth following.
God has provided you with A. A., detox and treatment centers, counsellors, therapists, doctors and (perhaps not least) this thread. But you have to reach out. I'm fond of saying that we regulars here have well over a century of cumulative sobriety; and I'll state confidently that not one of us got it simply by sitting there waiting for God to do all the work.
We A.A.s like to say, "The elevator to sobriety is broken. You have to use the steps." My first recommendation is that, after reading this and whatever other replies have been posted, you call your local A. A. number at once. I did, had my last drink about 20 hours later, was in detox by the 21st, and at my first meeting within two days. It was a rough road at first; but it's been well worth following.
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madison1101
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There is a solution that has helped millions of alcoholics, if you are willing to reach out to others for help, in addition to God. Alcoholics Anonymous is available, and you can get the help you need there. I believe God gave me AA so that I could experience sobriety and freedom from alcohol, and serve Him more fully in and out of AA meetings.
God is listening. He does hear your prayers. Have you read 2 Corinthians, about Paul's thorn in the flesh? God does not always take away our thorns. Why should you expect Him to do for you what He did not do for Paul? God said in His Word that His grace is sufficient.
In attending AA and working the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, I have learned a great deal about God and His grace and mercy. I have also learned about being totally dependent upon Him for a daily reprieve from alcohol. He does not cure me for life, but gives me a daily reprieve from it.
God bless.
Trish
God is listening. He does hear your prayers. Have you read 2 Corinthians, about Paul's thorn in the flesh? God does not always take away our thorns. Why should you expect Him to do for you what He did not do for Paul? God said in His Word that His grace is sufficient.
In attending AA and working the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, I have learned a great deal about God and His grace and mercy. I have also learned about being totally dependent upon Him for a daily reprieve from alcohol. He does not cure me for life, but gives me a daily reprieve from it.
God bless.
Trish
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BlessEwe
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I have felt the same and basically got myself deep into a hole waiting for God to change my situation. And will say once you take the first hardest step of reaching out for help, you will see the glory and find the amazement of God opening the doors you have never seemed possible.
It is like taking the first step of faith knowing God will catch you as you walk off the cliff of newness
We want change, but don't want to do the work. Or it is easier to stay the way things are because we are scared of the unknown.
The recovery community comes in many different ways. Stepping into one of those forms for support and gaining tools to stop the drinking, gaining wisdom ect. you will see that God has been there the whole time. It is us blocking Him
I would recommend finding a recovery community, I go to AA, there are also meetings at churches. I couldn't understand why God was not helping me while going to church. Yes it is good to go to church, but it is also good to go into recovery support groups because people understand addiction there.
Working on yourself though the 12 steps you will begin to see the things that keep you drinking even though you know you have a problem. It is a great, loving supportive community that will surround you. Give it some time as well to let the info sink in, some just go to one meeting and never go back... not giving it a chance or checking out another meeting to see if it matches.
It is like taking the first step of faith knowing God will catch you as you walk off the cliff of newness
We want change, but don't want to do the work. Or it is easier to stay the way things are because we are scared of the unknown.
The recovery community comes in many different ways. Stepping into one of those forms for support and gaining tools to stop the drinking, gaining wisdom ect. you will see that God has been there the whole time. It is us blocking Him
I would recommend finding a recovery community, I go to AA, there are also meetings at churches. I couldn't understand why God was not helping me while going to church. Yes it is good to go to church, but it is also good to go into recovery support groups because people understand addiction there.
Working on yourself though the 12 steps you will begin to see the things that keep you drinking even though you know you have a problem. It is a great, loving supportive community that will surround you. Give it some time as well to let the info sink in, some just go to one meeting and never go back... not giving it a chance or checking out another meeting to see if it matches.
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TheMainException
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Hm....yea...i felt this way in my depression for 7 years. Your stories sounds a lot like mine (switch out your alcohol for 5 of those years and switch in pure depressed agony instead, then add back in the alcohol plus a lot of drugs in the last two years and you'll have a relatively clear picture of life for a while).
I've realized something that's going to hurt you. It's going to be a bit of "What the heck? God is God, why doesn't He get the heck down here and do something instead of letting me suffer?" There is NO biblical basis for what I'm going to say. That doesn't mean it doesn't hold value. Even Solomon took some of his wisdom from the Egyptians now and again...so, here I go. A phrase I've long since learned (and hated) was this: God helps those who help themselves. Again, like I said, I've found really no biblical basis for this... What I've found instead is a life understanding, real life experience in that thing.
This phrase, however aggrevating it can be to a person holds truth to it some how. Many Christians seem to think that being absolutely helpless and hopeless is the only way that God can work in us. That if we somehow try to work it out on our own that we are going AGAINST God's plan for our lives and in some huge way, wrecking things. I'd like to scream until my throat bleeds if that were the case. It's not. (and quite thankfully I might add). We can do something about our plights. We have power as human beings. Therapists aid us. We can aid ourselves. We can aid each other. Take control of your life. What have you done to take back your life as a man of God?
In the dark desperate nights where I cried in the pitiful darkness of my room I knew I was utterly and hopelessly alone. God was never there. He never came down from Heaven and heard my cries, my pleading and begging to be released from torment. Instead, he sent more torture. All this I thought was the truth. I realized later that those were some of the biggest lies I had ever swallowed. I wasn't alone. I didn't have to reach up into heaven and he didn't have to reach down like some Zeus on a cloud. He sat right next to me in my bed and cried along with me. As the years passed, I dug deep into psychology, christianity, and drugs. Those three things reshaped my entire view of life. (I'm NOT saying to go out and do drugs, please do not, reshaping comes in good and bad experiences and although some of my drug experiences I consider good could have been better had I not been doing drugs). My thinking changed, I realized I did have the power to do things, God didn't make me as a weak and incapable human, but a being with reasoning power, with imagination, with a desire to strive towards what was good and to become whole.
So strive. Don't wallow in thoughts of being unable to move forward. Take a few steps. No, literally please. Get up, walk a few steps, then back to your chair. Did you walk forward the entire time? Quite not. That's literally impossible. For every move of your foot forward, watch the other...backwards it goes. For humans, forward motion often involves backwards motion. We fall, we fail. We trip and crash onto a hard wood floor and scuff our knee. It happens. If God had moved us forward, there would be no backward motion. He would simply transport us according to His desire and there is would be. Done. But such is not the case if we do it. He will help you and you will notice (in hindsight usually) that you took very small backward steps and seemingly large forward ones: that's Him. In becoming whole, there is pain, there is suffering, there are mistakes...but you can do it. He's on your side...and believe it or not, He's not kicking you in the teeth or ignoring you.
I've realized something that's going to hurt you. It's going to be a bit of "What the heck? God is God, why doesn't He get the heck down here and do something instead of letting me suffer?" There is NO biblical basis for what I'm going to say. That doesn't mean it doesn't hold value. Even Solomon took some of his wisdom from the Egyptians now and again...so, here I go. A phrase I've long since learned (and hated) was this: God helps those who help themselves. Again, like I said, I've found really no biblical basis for this... What I've found instead is a life understanding, real life experience in that thing.
This phrase, however aggrevating it can be to a person holds truth to it some how. Many Christians seem to think that being absolutely helpless and hopeless is the only way that God can work in us. That if we somehow try to work it out on our own that we are going AGAINST God's plan for our lives and in some huge way, wrecking things. I'd like to scream until my throat bleeds if that were the case. It's not. (and quite thankfully I might add). We can do something about our plights. We have power as human beings. Therapists aid us. We can aid ourselves. We can aid each other. Take control of your life. What have you done to take back your life as a man of God?
In the dark desperate nights where I cried in the pitiful darkness of my room I knew I was utterly and hopelessly alone. God was never there. He never came down from Heaven and heard my cries, my pleading and begging to be released from torment. Instead, he sent more torture. All this I thought was the truth. I realized later that those were some of the biggest lies I had ever swallowed. I wasn't alone. I didn't have to reach up into heaven and he didn't have to reach down like some Zeus on a cloud. He sat right next to me in my bed and cried along with me. As the years passed, I dug deep into psychology, christianity, and drugs. Those three things reshaped my entire view of life. (I'm NOT saying to go out and do drugs, please do not, reshaping comes in good and bad experiences and although some of my drug experiences I consider good could have been better had I not been doing drugs). My thinking changed, I realized I did have the power to do things, God didn't make me as a weak and incapable human, but a being with reasoning power, with imagination, with a desire to strive towards what was good and to become whole.
So strive. Don't wallow in thoughts of being unable to move forward. Take a few steps. No, literally please. Get up, walk a few steps, then back to your chair. Did you walk forward the entire time? Quite not. That's literally impossible. For every move of your foot forward, watch the other...backwards it goes. For humans, forward motion often involves backwards motion. We fall, we fail. We trip and crash onto a hard wood floor and scuff our knee. It happens. If God had moved us forward, there would be no backward motion. He would simply transport us according to His desire and there is would be. Done. But such is not the case if we do it. He will help you and you will notice (in hindsight usually) that you took very small backward steps and seemingly large forward ones: that's Him. In becoming whole, there is pain, there is suffering, there are mistakes...but you can do it. He's on your side...and believe it or not, He's not kicking you in the teeth or ignoring you.
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Your Friend Adam
Outside Eden, struggling toward Gethsemane
I can't relate to your experience of praying for relief, but I certainly can to your pattern of drinking. For about 2 years before I got sober I had been wanting to go back to church, but I knew that if I went to church that I was going to have to stop drinking like I was drinking. I wasn't ready to stop drinking so I tried modifying my drinking but always ended up like before. Finally, in a moment of accountability with my wife, I decided that I wanted to stop and sought an AA meeting. That was almost 6 years ago and I have been sober "one day at a time" since.
There are other recovery programs and they seem to work for some folks, so help is available and frankly, those folks need you there. It is the newcomers that keep the groups going.
Try 60 meetings in 60 days and if you don't like what you find then I'm sure the folks you've spent time with will be glad to refund your misery.
God bless.
There are other recovery programs and they seem to work for some folks, so help is available and frankly, those folks need you there. It is the newcomers that keep the groups going.
Try 60 meetings in 60 days and if you don't like what you find then I'm sure the folks you've spent time with will be glad to refund your misery.
God bless.
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I just don't get 'angry' about support cuz it's there it's just my stubborn mind set can't accept it and God's been here with me and with you every step but see -we're blind to it. I'm sure it's the effect of the alcohol on our thinkin process..pray and pray more
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madison1101
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I forgot.
www.aa.org
Go there to read about AA, and find a meeting near you.
God bless.
www.aa.org
Go there to read about AA, and find a meeting near you.
God bless.
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- Feb 25, 2009
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Thanks for the responses, Theres alot of good insight and advice, but more importantly a nice swift kick to the rear well recieved! You made me realize that I am wallowing in a situation that requires ME to take some responsability for raising my glass to my lips. I dont think I'm the type to ever bring myself to go to AA but I will try not "to make provision for the flesh." Any additional advice you can offer will be gladly accepted. Thanks again!
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BlessEwe
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I was thinking about the responce you got very quickly and all pretty much comfirmed it for you, glad you recieved it well. Many are reluctant to go to any kind of support AA type of meetings because we feel we are weak, and a loser, and very embarrased. Letting others know what we have been hiding for so long. Actually to tell you the truth I have found the most winning people there because they are working hard on themself, and really understand me / my addiction, and most have God as there higher power so it is a spiritual group.
Perhaps do a search for an online group and forum for recovery. There is a large christian one that has tons of daily reading. You may find that AA groups are really not that bad, and decide to go in person.
God Bless
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TheMainException
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There is great joy in my spirit to know that you have received all that was said so well. Then it was truly time for you to hear it (and hear it you did, it seems not a single one went against the other in this). I encourage you to get an accountability partner even if you don't want to go to AA. For anything really, having someone who is there who knows what you're going through can really be quite the aid in not continuing in that action or embracing a new action.
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madison1101
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I once said the same thing you said, about not ever going to an AA meeting. If I went to one of those meetings, I would have to tell people I am an alcoholic, and worse yet, I would have to associate with those people, and I am not like those people, I am special because of .......
Well, that was my pride, shame and ego all preventing me from experiencing some awesome experiences sooner rather than later.
First, I found out that the people in AA do not judge anyone who walks into a meeting. Their goal is to help one another not drink, and get better emotionally, spiritually, and socially. They don't care who you are, what you have done, where you go to church, how much education you have, if you are married, divorced, or whatever. All they care about is if you want to stop drinking, they will show you how they stopped.
I was terrified, and felt like such a loser when I first came to AA. I did not realize just how much more I had to gain by admitting I had a problem and getting the help they offered.
If you are curious about AA, I am part of a Yahoo group that is for beginners. It's easy to join a Yahoo group. Here is the link for the AA Beginners.
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/aabeginnersclub/?yguid=312893505
God bless.
Oh, one more thing. Some churches host a 12 Step Christian group for people with all types of problems. It is called Celebrate Recovery. I have never attended one, but they sound interesting.
God bless.
Trish
Well, that was my pride, shame and ego all preventing me from experiencing some awesome experiences sooner rather than later.
First, I found out that the people in AA do not judge anyone who walks into a meeting. Their goal is to help one another not drink, and get better emotionally, spiritually, and socially. They don't care who you are, what you have done, where you go to church, how much education you have, if you are married, divorced, or whatever. All they care about is if you want to stop drinking, they will show you how they stopped.
I was terrified, and felt like such a loser when I first came to AA. I did not realize just how much more I had to gain by admitting I had a problem and getting the help they offered.
If you are curious about AA, I am part of a Yahoo group that is for beginners. It's easy to join a Yahoo group. Here is the link for the AA Beginners.
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/aabeginnersclub/?yguid=312893505
God bless.
Oh, one more thing. Some churches host a 12 Step Christian group for people with all types of problems. It is called Celebrate Recovery. I have never attended one, but they sound interesting.
God bless.
Trish
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I attend a Christ based support group called Celebrate Recovery. It's like AA but Christ centered. It has been a really great experience because I too, was always too scared to attend reg meetings..Anways, check out local churches, that is usually where they are held. Now I am confident enough to go to regular AA as I need more support then twice week at this time...
God Bless
Sarah
God Bless
Sarah
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faithful follower
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Some folks shun AA because they think it's not Christian, but it's definitely God! You get to determine your Higher Power and that can sound scary, but when you read the literature (especially the early stuff) you find a lot of bible in there. I get great Christian fellowship through AA and none of the shame that I sometimes find in churches. When you're ready, give us a try.
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madison1101
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When I first went to AA, I was more comfortable in AA because of the unconditional acceptance and love I received. I praise God that now, I have a church that shows that same love and acceptance.
Trish
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S
samphillipssr
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My friend, do not trust in the arm of flesh ( AA ) only. Do trust completely in God.
I've had over my share of drinking many years ago, but it was not one day at a time that delivered me... it was God. You must surrender your heart to God, read your Bible and pray daily.
Do this first thing when you wake up and as often as possible through out the day.
We must account for our actions, but God is with us every step of the way. You won't see or hear God, most likely, in the physical, but He's there. He promised He'd never leave or forsake us.
Stand on Gods promises. He's your best friend. He'll deliver you completely not one day at a time. We'll be praying for and with you.
I've had over my share of drinking many years ago, but it was not one day at a time that delivered me... it was God. You must surrender your heart to God, read your Bible and pray daily.
Do this first thing when you wake up and as often as possible through out the day.
We must account for our actions, but God is with us every step of the way. You won't see or hear God, most likely, in the physical, but He's there. He promised He'd never leave or forsake us.
Stand on Gods promises. He's your best friend. He'll deliver you completely not one day at a time. We'll be praying for and with you.
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madison1101
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AA taught me how to trust God by teaching me how to work the 12 Steps, and to surrender to Him every day. AA is not just a group of alcoholics who get together to commiserate about their drinking. It is a program with spiritual guidance in the 12 steps.
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BlessEwe
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Just like church or any type of christian program God has to be in the center of it always
Just like church God works through people for support and prayer. God in the flesh.
The reason AA works is because it takes care of the whole being spiritual, mental, physical many in the christian community do not understand the addiction mind, being in a support group with people who understand is a very big part of recovery.
I have yet to meet anyone who has long term sobriety who does not have the trust of God Daily /Sometimes hourly in the center of their life.
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