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MehGuy

A member of the less neotenous sex..
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Curious about how many people prefer alone time compared to being social.

Do you like spending weekends alone or out with friends more?

Do you like being single and not having someone else around?
 

MehGuy

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Kind of a Catch-22 for me.

I want to be doing more things in life outside of the internet but I'm easily burnt out from social interaction and need alone time.

Yeah me too. Happens very fast too. One minute I'm social and the next I want to get away from everybody. I used to be different when I was younger, but having the weekend all to myself is pretty great.

While I'd like to be in a relationship I can't say I experience any loneliness from being single.
 
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ImAllLikeOkWaitWat

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Kind of a Catch-22 for me.

I want to be doing more things in life outside of the internet but I'm easily burnt out from social interaction and need alone time.

I need some friends to hang out with to see if I won't get burnt out as I used to since I don't get as offended as before to things people say. I think thats what burnt me out the most was just being so sensitive. I take pretty much everything in stride unless someone needs to be checked which doesn't happen very often. But I'm guessing i wont be burnt out as much because people won't trigger me as much.
 
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dzheremi

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I'm not sure if I'd say I prefer alone time, but it's definitely what I'm used to. I was a latch-key kid since my parents divorced when I three years old and my mother was always working, so there was a lot of fending for myself involved in growing up (especially with an older brother who was just older enough to be a bully, rather than being a helpful role model; it is extremely arguable whether or not that came later after we both grew up a bit ). Looking back, I am very glad things worked out this way. To think there are teenagers and young adults in their twenties who can't handle basic life tasks like doing laundry, washing dishes, cooking basic meals, attending to their own medical needs, etc. (and there really are; I've met more than a few) makes me less than optimistic about our future as a species/society.

Anyway. probably because of this background I've been told I'm rather aloof and can sometimes be difficult to talk to. A danger of being alone too much is that you can become kind of feral, adopting weird sleeping/eating patterns, talking to yourself even when others are around, being extremely set in doing things a certain way, etc. None of that is very conducive to having healthy relationships, so I try to get out enough to at least keep my social skills up to a level whereby I don't think I would scare others away were they interested in getting to know me (or if I would, they'd tell me "You're being weird; stop"). But you'd have to ask them how well that goes. I have had a recent ex who continues to call me despite having a very good relationship with her current boyfriend, just because she says I'm fun to talk to. Familiarity and all, I guess (we've known each other for over a dozen years by now, and helped each other through deaths of family members, cancer, broken marriages, etc.; we just don't work as a couple). But as far as being single vs. having someone around...I've had both, and I think the results are about evenly split. The advantages to having someone is basically avoiding being in your own head all the time, which is nice, while being single allows for more personal growth because you can just do things for you, according to your own goals, etc. and you don't have to consider how it would effect someone else. Or, alternatively, you can give up and become a sweatpants-wearing, cheetoh dust-covered, basement-dwelling weirdo. It really is your choice. That's what makes life worth living. I'm trying to go to the gym and all that for unrelated reasons (I already don't dwell in a basement, and have never liked cheetohs, don't own a fedora or call anyone "m'lady", etc.), but we'll see how that goes...

So I dunno. I'm alone a lot, not necessarily by choice, and I've never really considered that it should be otherwise. If/when I do find someone new, hopefully it will be with a new outlook and a new set of circumstances, as I don't know that my personal situation right now really fits in with whatever someone else has going on (e.g., I live in a very small apartment in a not-great part of town, I don't have a lot of money, I have a lot of health problems, etc. So basically, lots and lots to work on, just like anyone).
 
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ImAllLikeOkWaitWat

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Curious about how many people prefer alone time compared to being social.

I prefer both. Theres nothing like connecting with a person you just met for the first time face to face likewise theres nothing like living by yourself in a quiet neighborhood and reading a book.
Do you like spending weekends alone or out with friends more?

What friends?
Do you like being single and not having someone else around?

Yeah. I'll probably change this in my 40's because I do want to have kids but much later. I want to enjoy my 30's.
 
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Rajni

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What is the secret?
I think it's just my wiring, being an introvert.
I value my alone time even more now, given my highly people-
intensive job (I'm a cashier in a store). By the end of my shift,
I'm done being social (and I do enjoy it for a time) and just
want to crawl back under my rock!

-
 
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Go Braves

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I'd rather be more social but I've got a job where I'm on my own most of the time during it so I've been forced to learn to adapt. When I'm not working I try to have some company. My girl when she's here, buddies the rest of the time.
 
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Citanul

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Well of course other people are exhausting.

I thought this was common knowledge/experience, not a matter of preference...

No, that's actually the difference between introverts and extroverts. Introverts gain energy from being alone, so they would find other people exhausting, but extroverts gain energy from being around other people, so they wouldn't necessarily find them exhausting.
 
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dzheremi

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Hmm. That makes sense. Thanks!

I guess I always assumed that everyone needs their alone time. Even the party animals I have known eventually burned out and needed to stop living like that. And the idea of life being one big party kinda makes me tired just thinking about it.
 
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Take Heart

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Yeah I definitely get my energy from my peace & quiet time. Though I do have my moments where I crave to be in a social setting or being surrounded by people in general like window-shopping at the mall.
 
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Multifavs

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I enjoy alone time, but I don't get much since at least one other member of my family is usually home with me. When I'm alone I can play music as much as I want, sing without worrying about anyone hearing me, or just have some peace and quiet.

I do enjoy spending time with family too, and I enjoy spending time with friends (though I don't have any in real life right now). But I'm not good at socializing (in real life) and I don't like doing it either, at least not with people I don't know well.
 
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Niels

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I like to spend my weekends alone. It helps me feel centered, gives me time to work around the house, and allows for uninterrupted time to focus on personal projects.

It also helps me recharge my social batteries. Ideally, I suppose, I would find a job that requires less social interaction. That way, I would have more energy left over by the end of the week to search for a spouse.
 
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