• Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

  • CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.

  • We hope the site problems here are now solved, however, if you still have any issues, please start a ticket in Contact Us

  • The rule regarding AI content has been updated. The rule now rules as follows:

    Be sure to credit AI when copying and pasting AI sources. Link to the site of the AI search, just like linking to an article.

Age difference in relationship...need advise

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Sort by date Sort by votes
H

hasnoname

Senior Member
May 16, 2005
493
30
Plano, Texas
✟30,987.00
Country
Aruba
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
i posted this in the Teen section, but I figured I would get more mature and wise answers here...

So I have started talking to someone from my youth group that is really cool. She loves the Lord...is very smart and also very attractive. We have been talking a lot lately (not the past 2 days as she is in Colorado at a family reunion)...such as Sunday night...when we talked for 4 hours straight and only stopped because it was 2.30 and she had to get up at 6 to go to Colorado. There is obviously potential for something...as it is pretty clear that we both have those 'feelings' for each other and have tons of stuff in common...she is a great girl. However, I have a hangup. I just graduated and will be going off to college in 2 weeks. She is only a junior in high school. Logically I would just wait until I leave...let this little summer fling die away...but I am only going 15 minutes away from where I am now...and will still be attending the same church. Is 2 years too much...I know under ordinary circumstances it wouldnt be...but we are in completely different parts of our lives...she is still in high school while I am moving on to college. On the other hand she is more mature than most girls my age (through Christ). Any advise?
 
S

silentpoet

Contributor
Jun 1, 2004
6,385
388
50
Arkansas
✟30,957.00
Faith
Nazarene
Politics
US-Others
If God is with you then it shall be. If God brought you together for that purpose, then He will make it possible to get together later. I am not saying wait, I will say pray about it. If God has placed you together, the waiting shall seem like nothing when you look back from many years in the future as you age and grow together.
 
Upvote 0
H

hasnoname

Senior Member
May 16, 2005
493
30
Plano, Texas
✟30,987.00
Country
Aruba
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Ok...just wondering...why 18...its not like we will be involved physically...so it wont be illegal or anything. But I do agree with waiting...it is what I have been feeling too. She turns 17 in October...so really 1 year 3 months until she is 18. That is not a lot of time at all. However...it is not the number I was worried about. It is that she is junior in high school...two more years of high school nonsense...
 
Upvote 0
the_man

the_man

" My heart is spoken for&
Nov 21, 2002
1,258
83
47
Boulder CO
✟31,840.00
Faith
Non-Denom
chrisd53 said:
Ok...just wondering...why 18...its not like we will be involved physically...so it wont be illegal or anything. But I do agree with waiting...it is what I have been feeling too. She turns 17 in October...so really 1 year 3 months until she is 18. That is not a lot of time at all. However...it is not the number I was worried about. It is that she is junior in high school...two more years of high school nonsense...
Click to expand...

It has more to do with maturity than actual age.
 
Upvote 0
L

Leanna

Just me
Jul 20, 2004
15,660
175
✟39,278.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
I don't think that sounds like too much of a gap. You just have to remember to take it easy since she will be in high school for a while longer, not to mention you might get annoyed if she sounds high schoolish. Its better if the man is older because men mature slower-- sorry! Research does prove this. The only guy I ever dated that was younger than me couldn't keep up with me maturity wise. My husband is two years older than me.
 
Upvote 0
RefinedByFire

RefinedByFire

Senior Member
Jul 21, 2004
527
45
52
Orange County, CA
✟30,915.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
chrisd53 said:
On the other hand she is more mature than most girls my age (through Christ). Any advise?
Click to expand...

Aren't they all?

Wait til you get to college. You'll know what mature women really look like.

But, at any rate, you're in a sticky situation. I'm not going to give you advise because I don't know you and I don't know her. It's a case-by-case thing.

Good luck and all. :)
 
Upvote 0
H

hasnoname

Senior Member
May 16, 2005
493
30
Plano, Texas
✟30,987.00
Country
Aruba
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
koban4max said:
She's going to set you up. She might tell the police that you did her wrong..even you didn't.
Click to expand...

LOL....thats so far from the truth. She is following Jesus...and she actually dated a friend my age for 2 years...he wanted to be single and is going to college so he broke up with her a while ago. For us...we are just friends right now...but with as much as we talk it could easy be more.

RefinedByFire said:
Aren't they all?

Wait til you get to college. You'll know what mature women really look like.
Click to expand...

I wish they were...but they arent. She is the most mature in my youth group...and is just a really cool girl. But yeah...I know some mature girls from college...and they are so awesome. It is so refreshing to talk to them and just see God work in them. I see that in this girl. Just not to the degree as some of my older friends. I believe my maturity level has to be around that of who I date. That includes spiritual maturity. This is from experience. I would not consider dating anyone who did not meet that standard. And I know she does. She is way beyond her years...it is pretty cool.
 
Upvote 0
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

J
I need counsel
Replies
8
Views
769
Ethics & Morality
Yarddog
Yarddog
A
18M in need of relationship help
Replies
5
Views
695
Requests for Christian Advice
Firstlightdawn
Firstlightdawn
S
my mum said god teaches through punishment, i was punished with a 4 hour 30 minute saturday detenion do you think i deserved it ?
Replies
18
Views
818
Parenting Teens and Young Adults
Bob Crowley
Bob Crowley
JacquelineDeane55
Cliques among the youth in church?
Replies
0
Views
411
Friendship Court
JacquelineDeane55
JacquelineDeane55
Michie
Why are so many young Protestants in America’s power centers converting to Catholicism?
Replies
2
Views
287
One Bread, One Body - Catholic
joymercy
joymercy
Top Bottom
Jump to latest Follow Reply
Jump to latest Follow Reply