I can understand the worrying about the baby thing. I'm worried a little becuase we plan out trying in line with hubby's school so that it's during his breaks when we would have it. We pray about it also, and we have one child already, planned when we'd try for the next one for a year, and the month before it came to that time the lord told me it wasn't his will yet. And even though we tried anyways, I didn't get pregnant. That scares me a little because I'll be 26 before next one, and I want 4 children myself- I don't know how women can wait till they're 30, I'm way to concerned about my biological clock.
I have a 2 year old, he's such a blessing and at first actually helped our marriage because it filled a void and I wasn't so down on my hubby meeting my needs. But lately it's been putting all kinds of stress on our relationship, because he's having temper tantrums all the time, constantly getting into stuff- and although we both love him dearly- we get tired of it, can't wait unti he goes to bed, and get frustrated and angry with him at times. And sometimes while it's happening I get so stressed and snap at my hubby, telling him to take care of his needs so I don't have to deal with it. And sometimes this leads to arguments. Then of course there is the difference in opinions regarding discipline methods, with leads to great amounts of anger because we both think we are smart about it, and both want our opinions to be respected, instead we are quick to tell the other that their way is wrong. And plus I work full time and my hubby goes to school full time, so he's always stressed about school because wants to make good grades, and a lot of time he goes on and on and on about how he doesn't have time to do this or that (which only would take about 10 minutes) because he has this test and that test and so forth. All these things add strain, and there are times when you just get sick of it, tired of making effort to make the darn marriage work especially when all it is is just a commitment, without closeness and love. And there are times when we both want to throw in the towel, and have come very close to it.
Wanted to point out that having a child truly is a full time responsibility, and at this point it would probably tear the two of you apart because when there is a wailing baby that you cannot consol, and when both are trying to pass the responsibility to the other because of the stress, having to devote all that time and energy to that little one whether you feel like it or not......
Anyways, good luck. It would be good for you to take a good look at yourself, and practice being considerate of your wife above yourself- because bitterness is a one way ticket to divorce. It's the only way I can keep from divorcing my hubby- is not to think of all the ways he's failing me, and all the ways he's not taking my feelings into consideration- which is a very selfish thing to do.... I, I, I , I, I and I. We both went into this marriage thinking that we'd get something out of it, get our needs met- and sometimes squable just about that "your not meeting my needs" "NO, your not meeting my needs, I did this and this and this, and you aren't doing this and this and this" Guess I'll go marry someone else that makes me their world cause you are doing it. Sigh, marriage is just another responsibility, something that requires work, especially if both people aren't holding up their ends of the bargain or aren't making efforts. I have personally growing weary myself because I have been entertaining such negative thought as you have. But it does not lead down a good path. Sigh- got to endure, builds strength and character. The chapter that helps me the most personally is Umm, I think it's 1 corinthians chapter 7 where it says that no matter what situation you are in- seek to be content. Learning to be content is the key. Try not to entertain thoughts of discontentment, but as others on here have already said- focus on the positive, it is so easy to focus on the negative- purposely focus on her positives, praise her strengths, keep your mouth shut and even go to god about her weaknesses, bless her, give her the love that she may not deserve. Shoot, none of us deserve that love, but we are married to be a blessing, not to be blessed, that's agape love, God's way of loving someone- in turn you two will grow closer. It'll work, just purpose in your heart to do your part, and leave your partner's part up to God- because you can't change her anyways. And lets say you did divorce to find ms. right, the chances or odds are like 1,000 to one the you would meet that perfect person you'd connect well with, just another person to learn how to love and get along with with a different set of strengths and weaknesses. Might as well stay with the first person you married.
