abortion?

[bourgeois]

I put myself in a bad situation.

I guy I supposedly loved and who supposedly loved me back, was way to drunk for me to be hanging around.

He wanted to have sex and I said no.

Being the drunken guy that he was, he forced me into it anyways.

I took the morning after pill the following day.

I have been really down and depressed about the whole thing.

I have always been against abortion. But, was what I did technically abortion?

If so, am I that horrible of a person.

 

[scruffy1986]

No it's not! *hugs to you*

 

[chloeobrien]

*HUGE HUGS* its ok... a similar situation happened to me. You are not a horrible person for doing so. I know the feeling though. Sometimes I feel like a horrible person for killing the unborn, and sometimes I wish I hadn't taken it and had a baby. It is a tough situation, and it really sucks big time. You just did what you felt was best to take care of yourself after a horrible situation that never should have happened. It's NOT your fault, its HIS. Therefore the morning after pill is all HIS fault, and anything else you may do is HIS FAULT. He hurt you, he took advantage of you, you did all you could do to protect yourself in the situation. If you need someone to talk to about it all please feel free to IM or PM me or e-mail me. Please know that I care a lot about you and I feel your pain! *HUGE HUGS* to you for posting, it takes a lot of courage to talk about this even if it is online.

 

[Akathist]

It is impossible to know if you were pregnant of not when you took the Morning After Pill. There are some people who believe that this doesn't matter and it is still wrong. Others who believe that it is not wrong anyway. Whether it is wrong or not is not for us to decide here in Recovery. We are here to support you to recovery from this assault.

I don't think that you are a terrible person no matter what! What I think is more important is that you focus on how it was not your fault that you were sexually abused!

You were not at fault for being assaulted this way. Just because you knew the guy doesn't change the fact that this was an assult. It doesn't make you have to share the fault at all.

Being sexually abused brings with it feelings of embarrassment that might even become shame. It brings feelings of guilt that might become low self esteem or self distruction.

However, the person who should be embarrassed and ashamed and who should think badly about their actions is NOT YOU. It is the guy who did this to you. And being drunk is NO excuse.

You have the right to be friends with someone and hang out with them and not be treated as a sex object and asaulted this way!

I really encourage you to talk with a counselor as you try to work through all of these feelings. If you need hotlines to contact please pm me and I will hunt up some numbers for you. You can talk to your family doctor and get a referral as well.

 

[Akathist]

I want to remind everyone here that in recovery abortion is not allowed to be endorced. We also do not allow ethical discussions here. That means we do not want this thread to become a discussion about whether the day after pill is abortion or not. Let's focus on the hurt this woman is going through and leave the ethics to the ethics and morality or congregational areas of CF.
​

 

[LouTheWicked]

Nope. I'm sorry about what he did to you.

 

[livingword26]

I agree that the only real bad thing that happened was what the man did to you. If nothing else, the way you reacted may give you more compassion to those who actually go through an abortion. It may give you the ability to reach out to them and to help them recover. Right now though it is you that needs to recover. If you have not already done this, ask the Lord to forgive you if an embryo was released because of this pill. Then accept His forgiveness, and forgive yourself. Get some help from people that can help you begin to heal from what the man did to you. God bless you little sister.

 

[BelindaP]

God doesn't see any difference between sins, but He forgives them all. Swearing at the guy would have been sin, too (one I probably would have committed, at least). They are all the same in God's eyes, and Jesus' blood covers them all.

You are not a horrible person. You were responding to a horrible situation in the best way you know how. It is considered so standard that in some hospitals, they don't even tell you before administering the morning after pill. On a side note, if you didn't go to the hospital, I do hope that you follow through and get an HIV test, just to protect yourself.

You should try to leave all the events of that night in the past and try to move forward. Have you been in contact with a counselor? They can be of tremendous help.

God bless you.

 

[chloeobrien]

I agree with a lot BelindaP has said... a counselor would help a ton... If I didn't have one I wouldn't be gettin gbetter as quickly as I am. My counselor is really impressed with how well I am doing, but I am also doing all I can to get better. I just want to one day say that its left in the past and it not bother me anymore, and over`come my icky PTSD. (somehting you may possibly have as well as a side effect from the rape but not necessarily). If you need anyone to talk to I'm here for you and so is everyone else who has posted here. Its ok... I promise... you will be ok, I know you may not feel like it right now but you will be.

 

[Mr.Cheese]

.

 

[chessterbester]

I'm so sorry that happened to you. The morning after pill is different from a medical abortion (the abortion pill). It is essentially a high dose of birth control, which prevents ovulation from occuring, makes the uterus inhospitable for sperm, or depending on the hormonal combonation of the pill, if you have already ovulated and the egg was fertilized, prevents the fertilized egg from attaching to the uterine wall, whereas the abortion pill causes the uterus to expell the fetus. The morning after pill is not given if you are already pregnant, it is given if the potential of being pregnant is there. Whether or not that is right or wrong is a moral issue, there may or may not be a moral difference to you, but there is a medical difference between the two.

While there is obviously a debate as to where life begins, emergency contraception is a high dose of birth control that does essentially the same thing as birth control pills do. No one can figure out whether or not you feel that was wrong except for you.

REgardless, you have been through a traumatic experience and should seek out some kind of support.

 

[lostndown]

awww sweetie. i agree with everyone. i know its NOT your fault sweetie. u had no clue if u were pregnant or not u were being on safe side. thats not abortion, in my opinion. u were scared honey its ok.

i was raped in febuary so i know how scary it is. hon,if u need to talk, just pm me thats what im here for. im praying for u bunches. i am alicia, btw.

i work 11am - 5pm today

 

[sethad]

I put myself in a bad situation.

I guy I supposedly loved and who supposedly loved me back, was way to drunk for me to be hanging around.

He wanted to have sex and I said no.

Being the drunken guy that he was, he forced me into it anyways.

I took the morning after pill the following day.

I have been really down and depressed about the whole thing.

I have always been against abortion. But, was what I did technically abortion?

If so, am I that horrible of a person.

I dont think the morning after pill is abortion

And you're not a horrible person at all

 

[Breezy3]

You are not a horrible person!!! You do not even know if a pregnancy took place or not. You were scared and overwhelmed!

Just know that I care about you and your pain!

 

[BigToe]

You did what you had to do to take care of yourself after a traumatic situation. Don't let anyone give you a hard time for protecting yourself. Right or wrong is beside the point, you did what you felt you needed to do for yourself in that moment and after what you had experienced, doing what you wanted is what you needed.

 

[HeyJupiter]

the Morning After Pill PREVENTS pregnancy hun..im sorry this happened to you

(((HUGS)))

 

[LazeyWinde]

*Hugs* The only horrible person in this is the guy who forced himself on you. None of this was your fault. He should be the one feeling guilty, not you.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[tapero]

Please keep the posts on topic. Thanks.​

 

[Amin]

Hi,
I don't think you're a bad person at all.
Taking the morning after pill would work if there was conception. I don't think anyone can say if that happened. Not knowing if conception happened, how can you think that there was an abortion.
Which I'm not sure if it would be anyway. You have to take all these things into consideration.
What is the % that you would have conceieved? I don't know, maybe you know someone that does. I think it's in your favor that there wasn't conception.
You're not a bad person, it wasn't even your fault.
Bless You,
Chuck.