Five years ago, quite a while before my husband and I began our walk with God, we did a very stupid thing.
It was after the birth of our second child. My husbands parents were very heavily pushing, nearly ordering my husband to get a vasectomy. There were financial problems, problems in our marriage and what not and they felt that they were making a choice for us that was right. There was absolutely no option/choice given to us. It was made very clear that he had to have this done.
He made an appt., had an exam, his mother gave him a check to cover the surgery, and he made the appt. for the surgery. We started discussing it between ourselves and realized that having the surgery done was not a choice we felt comfortable with. For the same reason why I myself did not go through with a sterilization procedure. We felt that in the future we may be in a better position financially and in our marriage and want another child. So, he cancelled the surgery, but instead of giving the refunded money back and explaining our position, we instead took the refunded money and paid rent with it, then told everyone he had the surgery.
We have let them believe this for five years now. And recently we have reached a point in our lives where God willing we want to have another child. Things are great now, we're not rich but not poor and our marriage is stronger than ever. Our children are also excited at the idea of us having another child. We're walking with God and have been in a great church for about 6 months now. I quit taking birth control at the beginning of October and we have been trying.
I feel in my heart though a lot of fear. We are going to be letting down people we love all because we weren't strong enough to take a stand at the time. Not to mention my shame for lying the way we did. I know I'm forgiven by the God I love for this sin, but I fear that there are some who will refuse to forgive us.
I have been able to share our excitement with my mother who knew all along what we did, but I am still sad that most of the rest of the family won't share in the joy.
Someone please help me with this.
~~Harmony~~
It was after the birth of our second child. My husbands parents were very heavily pushing, nearly ordering my husband to get a vasectomy. There were financial problems, problems in our marriage and what not and they felt that they were making a choice for us that was right. There was absolutely no option/choice given to us. It was made very clear that he had to have this done.
He made an appt., had an exam, his mother gave him a check to cover the surgery, and he made the appt. for the surgery. We started discussing it between ourselves and realized that having the surgery done was not a choice we felt comfortable with. For the same reason why I myself did not go through with a sterilization procedure. We felt that in the future we may be in a better position financially and in our marriage and want another child. So, he cancelled the surgery, but instead of giving the refunded money back and explaining our position, we instead took the refunded money and paid rent with it, then told everyone he had the surgery.
We have let them believe this for five years now. And recently we have reached a point in our lives where God willing we want to have another child. Things are great now, we're not rich but not poor and our marriage is stronger than ever. Our children are also excited at the idea of us having another child. We're walking with God and have been in a great church for about 6 months now. I quit taking birth control at the beginning of October and we have been trying.
I feel in my heart though a lot of fear. We are going to be letting down people we love all because we weren't strong enough to take a stand at the time. Not to mention my shame for lying the way we did. I know I'm forgiven by the God I love for this sin, but I fear that there are some who will refuse to forgive us.
I have been able to share our excitement with my mother who knew all along what we did, but I am still sad that most of the rest of the family won't share in the joy.
Someone please help me with this.
~~Harmony~~
. Sometimes i like to think that there's nothing more scarier than God. People like your husband's parents aren't so tough 
