My testimony isn't something I've shared much before, but I hope that it will encourage other people here..
My mother and my father seperated before I was born, I won't go into details, because it isn't nessary...
But through the events that happend, and through a few corrupt court individuals, I was taken off my mother before I was 2.
From the earliest I can remeber, it was just my father and I... more often than not it was just me, because he was always away working, drinking or doing other things. My father would spend money on me, gifts and everything, but it was always inconsistant. One day he would be happy, the next he'd be in a drunken rage, throwing furniture and such.
All I wanted was a Dad who would spend time with me, a Father who wouldn't break every promise he ever made.
My Father I belive, was either involved in less than legal activies, or just made alot of enimes, because it felt like we were always moving. I was always the new kid at school, always pushed around. I could defend myself, 'cause I was afraid and weak.
My father met other women through these years, sometimes it lasted a while, three in fact were married, so I had temporary step-mums, but nothing ever lasted.
more often than not it was short term, then we'd move.
I spent the earliest years of my life living like this. I had very little self esteem, I was always seeking attention. Always afraid of drunken outbursts. Never having any friends, because of the moving. Very little interpesonal skills, and very little respect for women. They always left me.
then, the christmas that year.. err 1994 I think.
My father did a totaly different thing. Where as before (unknown to me) he had prevented any contact to my mothers family, he suddenly came out and asked me if I wanted to meet my grandparents. I have no doubt that his intentions were selfish, but God used this anyway.
1994, I met my grandparents, my brothers I didn't know I had, and my mother.
I had always been told by my Dad that Mum had left us, and was given the impression she didn't care.
But from the moment I met her I could see in her eyes that she loved me.
The day ended, I went back to my father, and he announced we were going to Queensland with my current step mum, to visit her family, and stay there for a while. I was excited about the prospect of going to Queensland, but I couldn't help feeling a sense of longing to not be so far away from my mother.
I didn't tell my father about my Mother, I had worked out in my head, that if I mentioned her he would get angry.
While in Queensland, I behaved as normal.
I was uncontrolable, rude, mean at times. This angered the Step Mum and her family, and caused many arguments, the last of wich resulted in my father and I once again by ourselves.
I'm not sure of the details of what happened, wether they kicked us out, or wether my father just walked out.
Reguardless, it was essential to God's plan.
My father and I spent several weeks in a caravan park. He often went out by himself to the near by casino.
But then the last major moved played out.
My Father found out, through calling my grandparents, that my Mother was in fact in Queensland.
He asked me, if I'd like to stay with my Mother for a while, I jumped at the chance, somewhat scared, but longing to see her again.
My father and my mother made the arrangements and I was handed over.
Suddenly I faced a major change, I was living with my mother, and two of my youngest brothers.
I was placed in the care of a woman who loves God with every breath she takes.
I grew to know my mother, and my family, and every day made me more determined to never go back.
It was a dificult struggle, I was still a horrible person, but for a change I could see it. I started to realise that the way I was living was not right.
My Mother taught me about God, and what he had done for us, how she had prayed night after night that he would keep me safe, and bring me back home.
I wanted to make my Mother happy, and I could see that my behaviour was making her sad.
It was a difficult struggle, my Mum loved me, but instead of getting back the sweet child she had lost, she got back a virtual monster.
But God worked in my life.
1996, I belive it was
We went to a large meeting thing, I don't remeber the details, but I remeber that the words that were spoken drove straight to the center of my heart.
I realised the extent of God's love for me, which I could now understand through the love shown to me by my Mother.
That day I gave my life to God, I prayed that he would forgive me of the life I had lived, and prayed he would change me into the person he wanted me to be.
From that day I felt a difference, I didn't change over night, but many of my attitudes did.
Many times I sat with my Mother, after losing my temper, or doing something mean, or stupid.
We'd sit and we'd pray together, that God would help me to change my heart, to help me change my actions, to control my temper.
It has been a long road, and I'm not finished walking yet. I still have so much to learn, but I'm not the person I once was, and I have a loving mother, and an awesome God to thank for it.
I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for them
So thankyou Jesus, for paying my debt, and loving me while I was still a sinner. Thankyou for bringing me home to my mother.
And I thank my mother, for not giving up on me, for waiting all those years, and for helping and encouraging me as I've grown from a lost boy into a young man serving God.
My mother and my father seperated before I was born, I won't go into details, because it isn't nessary...
But through the events that happend, and through a few corrupt court individuals, I was taken off my mother before I was 2.
From the earliest I can remeber, it was just my father and I... more often than not it was just me, because he was always away working, drinking or doing other things. My father would spend money on me, gifts and everything, but it was always inconsistant. One day he would be happy, the next he'd be in a drunken rage, throwing furniture and such.
All I wanted was a Dad who would spend time with me, a Father who wouldn't break every promise he ever made.
My Father I belive, was either involved in less than legal activies, or just made alot of enimes, because it felt like we were always moving. I was always the new kid at school, always pushed around. I could defend myself, 'cause I was afraid and weak.
My father met other women through these years, sometimes it lasted a while, three in fact were married, so I had temporary step-mums, but nothing ever lasted.
more often than not it was short term, then we'd move.
I spent the earliest years of my life living like this. I had very little self esteem, I was always seeking attention. Always afraid of drunken outbursts. Never having any friends, because of the moving. Very little interpesonal skills, and very little respect for women. They always left me.
then, the christmas that year.. err 1994 I think.
My father did a totaly different thing. Where as before (unknown to me) he had prevented any contact to my mothers family, he suddenly came out and asked me if I wanted to meet my grandparents. I have no doubt that his intentions were selfish, but God used this anyway.
1994, I met my grandparents, my brothers I didn't know I had, and my mother.
I had always been told by my Dad that Mum had left us, and was given the impression she didn't care.
But from the moment I met her I could see in her eyes that she loved me.
The day ended, I went back to my father, and he announced we were going to Queensland with my current step mum, to visit her family, and stay there for a while. I was excited about the prospect of going to Queensland, but I couldn't help feeling a sense of longing to not be so far away from my mother.
I didn't tell my father about my Mother, I had worked out in my head, that if I mentioned her he would get angry.
While in Queensland, I behaved as normal.
I was uncontrolable, rude, mean at times. This angered the Step Mum and her family, and caused many arguments, the last of wich resulted in my father and I once again by ourselves.
I'm not sure of the details of what happened, wether they kicked us out, or wether my father just walked out.
Reguardless, it was essential to God's plan.
My father and I spent several weeks in a caravan park. He often went out by himself to the near by casino.
But then the last major moved played out.
My Father found out, through calling my grandparents, that my Mother was in fact in Queensland.
He asked me, if I'd like to stay with my Mother for a while, I jumped at the chance, somewhat scared, but longing to see her again.
My father and my mother made the arrangements and I was handed over.
Suddenly I faced a major change, I was living with my mother, and two of my youngest brothers.
I was placed in the care of a woman who loves God with every breath she takes.
I grew to know my mother, and my family, and every day made me more determined to never go back.
It was a dificult struggle, I was still a horrible person, but for a change I could see it. I started to realise that the way I was living was not right.
My Mother taught me about God, and what he had done for us, how she had prayed night after night that he would keep me safe, and bring me back home.
I wanted to make my Mother happy, and I could see that my behaviour was making her sad.
It was a difficult struggle, my Mum loved me, but instead of getting back the sweet child she had lost, she got back a virtual monster.
But God worked in my life.
1996, I belive it was
We went to a large meeting thing, I don't remeber the details, but I remeber that the words that were spoken drove straight to the center of my heart.
I realised the extent of God's love for me, which I could now understand through the love shown to me by my Mother.
That day I gave my life to God, I prayed that he would forgive me of the life I had lived, and prayed he would change me into the person he wanted me to be.
From that day I felt a difference, I didn't change over night, but many of my attitudes did.
Many times I sat with my Mother, after losing my temper, or doing something mean, or stupid.
We'd sit and we'd pray together, that God would help me to change my heart, to help me change my actions, to control my temper.
It has been a long road, and I'm not finished walking yet. I still have so much to learn, but I'm not the person I once was, and I have a loving mother, and an awesome God to thank for it.
I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for them
So thankyou Jesus, for paying my debt, and loving me while I was still a sinner. Thankyou for bringing me home to my mother.
And I thank my mother, for not giving up on me, for waiting all those years, and for helping and encouraging me as I've grown from a lost boy into a young man serving God.
