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A Death in the Family

Michie

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(Just for clarification: This is an article. Not my mother).


My mother died at the end of August. She’d been diagnosed with cancer in 2021, and for the next four and a half years she’d poured herself into her family and friendships, as well as fighting the disease. This past winter, we started to notice a significant decline in her health. Treatments weren’t working anymore and we all knew that death wasn’t far away. I drove out in May for a Mother’s Day visit. We spent a week on the ocean this summer, and in August, I drove down to join my dad and siblings at her bedside to say goodbye.

Visitation

On the ground floor of her bright, sunlit suburban home, my mother’s hospital bed sat in front of her huge, picture window. She could look out on her flower-filled front garden, watch the birds they’d spent decades feeding as they fluttered around right in front of the glass. My dad had set up the television so she could watch baseball in the afternoons, and all the couches and chairs were tucked around houseplants, facing the bed. A little circle of companionship.

My youngest brother had flown in from the West, tucking a brief visit in before his teaching job picked up for the school year again. My other brother moved in for the month – working from home to give as much support to our dad as possible. My tender, southern sister did the same – with her husband joining her whenever he could. You could see in her eyes just how much the consistency of their presence meant to my mom.

During my visit, my sister pulled out all the photo albums from the upstairs closet and hauled them down to my mom’s retreat space. She took out photo after photo of family members and friends – we passed them all around, told stories, and showed them to Mom. Flowers and friends arrived daily to spend time with her. We watered all her houseplants, cleaned the bathrooms, cooked sustaining meals, and spent time together. I was inspired by just how service-oriented my siblings were – ready and willing to do anything to support my parents. Hard times really can bring out the best in people, and I was blessed to see my siblings’ love for our mother shine out in August.

Gathering Up Threads


Continued below.