English or German?
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby
>>English
>>will be the official language of the European Union rather than
>>German,
>>which was the other possibility.
>>
>>As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that
>>English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a
>>5-year
>>phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
>>
>>In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
>>Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
>>
>>The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k".This should klear up
>>konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.There will be
>>growing
>>public enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will
>>be
>>replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
>>
>>IIn the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
>>expected
>>to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
>>
>>Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have
>>always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that
>>the
>>horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it
>>should
>>go away.
>>
>>By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
>>"th"
>>with "z" and "w" with "v".
>>
>>During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o"
>>
>>kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve
>>vil
>>hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or
>>difikultis and
>>evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united
>>urop
>>vil finali kum tru.
>>
>>Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted
>>in
>>ze forst plas.
>>
>>If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl