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12 steps for codependency

If Not For Grace

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Al-Anon is very similiar-many al-anon members are co-dependant.

They have had a very good success rate and focus alot on boundaries.

One of the 1st things is to realize that being good to yourself (self-esteem) is a Good thing and is not at all selfish. We are valuable and as such are entitled to be respected (that includes self-respect).

We are also taught to look at motives-if we are engaging in "people pleasing" we need to know the root of why? Usually this is a reflection of poor self esteem as well.
(We want people to like us-so often we accept unacceptable behavior to try & achieve this result).

We are entitled to set (& move/change) boundaries. Boundaries let people know how we wish to be treated and set consequences for violations.

Co-dependant are usually "helping" type people. Many are nurses, teachers, police officers, social workers, and what I call extreme parents. Anything we do in excess is usually unhealthly for us & sometimes we need to re-define the term help to help ourselves clairy our relationships w/others.

Co-Dependant No More is a book well worth the read if you suspect you have codependant tendancies.

Love, Grace
 
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