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11 Months Sober and on Step 9

madison1101

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I was in a rehab in January, struggling with my arrogance and strong desire to get out of there. There I learned that I had not ever worked all 12 Steps of AA with a sponsor. I always stopped working the Steps at Step 7. I never made formal amends to anyone, except my children and ex.

So, when I did my 4th Step this time, I did it the way it was explained in the AA Big Book, making a list of resentments, and then using that list of people for Step 8 and 9.

My AA Anniversary is January 15th. So, Wednesday, I had 11 months sober. In previous sobrieties, I have had over 8 years once, and over 6 years. But, in 2007, I picked up, and that began a horrendous journey that included outpatient treatment, and eventually my first stay at an inpatient rehab. Even with outpatient treatment, I was slipping and sliding all the time. I would get a few months, and pick up for a week or two, then get four or five months, and on and one for two solid years.

I am so grateful for this sobriety. It is precious and precarious. I have chronic pain, and have to take pain killers on a regular basis. I need a cortisone shot for bursitis, and can't get it for five months because I am on Coumadin for a blood clot, and can't go off the Coumadin till my hematologist allows it. Prior to the pain management doctors, I was drinking to get rid of the physical pain. Now, I must be diligent with my pain pills.

Trish R.
 

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Relaspe if Often part of recovery-don't worry about the past. Not even God can change the past. I like to use step 4 to find out what I am good at and then use it to help me move in a positive direction (that's my goal).

The blueprint for progress is a "suggested" method, meaning one way of doing the 4th step. I prefer concentrating on the good characteristics as opposed to listing "faults". When it comes to forgiveness, I concentrate on how much I have been forgiven & that makes me more readily forgive. I also found out most of the resentments I had were based on unrealistic expectations. (You can't expect a person to be something they are not, even if that's "on-time" or "Trustworthy")

A wolf w/b a wolf (do not expect to make a "good dog" from a wolf. A wolf has a certain nature, I have no power over that. PS-the wolf has a purpose in life, & he fulfills it. I do not say the wolf is bad, or good. He is a wolf. Know the characteristics of a wolf & let the wolf be a wolf (As though you could make him otherwise:doh:)

I have learned to go by the "Just for Today" track & to LIVE and let Live.
i don't do it perfectly all the time, but I'm better than I used to be, & when I catch myself backsliding, I stop & turn around alot faster than I used to.

Just remember: Progress not Perfection. You'll get there!:wave:
 
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