How do you deal with losing friends/family/loved ones

ChristIsKingofKings · Apr 29, 2026

Greetings brothers and sisters in Christ.

If you’ve read my last post then you may already know why I’m asking this.

Due to personal convictions over playing certain games, I may or may not lose my online friends who I have known for 5 years now and met when I was very much outside of Christ. If you want more information on my situation, read my last post, as I’m making this one for a different reason.

Essentially, if you are willing to share, I’d like to know how some of you lost your family, friends or loved ones due to convictions (or anything else as well). How did it happen? What was the reason? How did our amazing God help you through it and in what ways did He show up for you? And how are you fairing today?

I ask because, I will admit, I really don’t want to lose my friends. But I’d rather lose them and still have a relationship with God than rebel against my Creator for their sake. I’ve never lost a long friendship like this before as I’ve never really had any friends outside of them.

But I want to follow Jesus even when it hurts (especially then).

I don’t know if I will lose my friends or not, that I leave to the Lord. But in case it does, I’d like to hear from you (again, if you’re willing, no pressure) for some reassurance, encouragement and to just generally be prepared if that does happen.

Thank you all once again

I love you all and Jesus loves you more ❤️❤️❤️.

Levi.

Freth · Apr 30, 2026

Friends have come and gone in my own life. People change. What brought us together years ago may no longer be the case today. Social media has a way of showing you who you should have moved on from a long time ago. Old friends, acquaintances and co-workers connect with you on social media apps, but you soon find out in their feeds that you have little to nothing in common anymore. We hold onto these connections out of fear of losing contact with someone we haven't talked to or seen in years. It's the same for old girlfriends.

What I would do is look at the friendships and see what else you have in common outside of what has changed in your own life. If there is nothing in common, move on. It can be as simple as getting on whatever app your friends are using (or game) and say, look, things have changed, I'm moving on. If you want to stay in contact and still be friends, and we have things in common outside of gaming, by all means friend me on such and such app and we'll talk and maybe get together and enjoy each other's company. I actually did this and it worked out fine.

There's nothing wrong with staying friends with people if your interests change, but you will find that such a friendship isn't much of a friendship at all, unless there are other things you can share. However, I would say, as a Christian, that I do tend to keep those connections so that I can be a positive influence in their lives, and also be of help in their time of need. I've had friends that came to me for support after years of not talking, which is the perfect chance to witness for the Lord; not in a pressing sort of way but through normal conversation and my own life choices, beliefs and experiences.

Those are my thoughts.

timf · Apr 30, 2026

If you were to get another job or move to another city, some of the friends you have would change. You might try to connect with your friends and mention that you are trying to make room for Jesus in your life. Many people will want to avoid you. However, you may find some of your friends are interested.

Aussie52 · Apr 30, 2026

Both my parents have passed away. My Dad was a Christian, so I have that assurance that he is with the Lord.
My mother is a different story. Although she heard the Gospel story many times, I am not sure of her standing before God. This has caused me a lot of inward pain and guilt. Should I have said more? Should I have been more assertive in sharing Christ with her? The thought that she might be in Hell brings me great sadness. I guess I can only hope that maybe she made her peace with God towards the end.

My eldest daughter recently emailed me (she lives on the other side of the country) telling me she wants nothing to do with me anymore.
This came as a shock and was totally unexpected. As you can appreciate, I was deeply hurt, especially by the accusations she made.

How does one cope with these traumatic events that come into our lives?
Firstly, see & acknowledge that God is still on the Throne. He is in control & will make all things work together for good.
Secondly, His grace is sufficient. He pours healing into our troubled souls & gives us strength to carry on. Praise His Name.

ChristIsKingofKings · Apr 30, 2026

Jeff Carr said:
Both my parents have passed away. My Dad was a Christian, so I have that assurance that he is with the Lord.
My mother is a different story. Although she heard the Gospel story many times, I am not sure of her standing before God. This has caused me a lot of inward pain and guilt. Should I have said more? Should I have been more assertive in sharing Christ with her? The thought that she might be in Hell brings me great sadness. I guess I can only hope that maybe she made her peace with God towards the end.

My eldest daughter recently emailed me (she lives on the other side of the country) telling me she wants nothing to do with me anymore.
This came as a shock and was totally unexpected. As you can appreciate, I was deeply hurt, especially by the accusations she made.

How does one cope with these traumatic events that come into our lives?
Firstly, see & acknowledge that God is still on the Throne. He is in control & will make all things work together for good.
Secondly, His grace is sufficient. He pours healing into our troubled souls & gives us strength to carry on. Praise His Name.

Praise His name indeed brother. Our God is awesome. Worthy to be praised, magnified, glorified and edified!

I’m sorry to hear about your eldest daughter and how she cut contact with you. I can’t imagine how something like that would feel. However, it seems that the Lord has indeed carried you through and is carrying you through. All glory to Him.

I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your parents as well. With your late mother, I believe that even on our deathbeds we can choose Christ and inherit eternal life. It’s impossible to say if your mother opened her heart to the Lord before she died. Our God knows best. I know He will judge fairly, for He is the righteous judge.

I will be praying for you brother and for your eldest daughter to be reconciled to you and to our Heavenly Father.

ChristIsKingofKings · Apr 30, 2026

Freth said:
Friends have come and gone in my own life. People change. What brought us together years ago may no longer be the case today. Social media has a way of showing you who you should have moved on from a long time ago. Old friends, acquaintances and co-workers connect with you on social media apps, but you soon find out in their feeds that you have little to nothing in common anymore. We hold onto these connections out of fear of losing contact with someone we haven't talked to or seen in years. It's the same for old girlfriends.

What I would do is look at the friendships and see what else you have in common outside of what has changed in your own life. If there is nothing in common, move on. It can be as simple as getting on whatever app your friends are using (or game) and say, look, things have changed, I'm moving on. If you want to stay in contact and still be friends, and we have things in common outside of gaming, by all means friend me on such and such app and we'll talk and maybe get together and enjoy each other's company. I actually did this and it worked out fine.

There's nothing wrong with staying friends with people if your interests change, but you will find that such a friendship isn't much of a friendship at all, unless there are other things you can share. However, I would say, as a Christian, that I do tend to keep those connections so that I can be a positive influence in their lives, and also be of help in their time of need. I've had friends that came to me for support after years of not talking, which is the perfect chance to witness for the Lord; not in a pressing sort of way but through normal conversation and my own life choices, beliefs and experiences.

Those are my thoughts.

Thank you for your thoughts brother and the wisdom that the Lord has given you. I agree with everything you have said. All glory to our God.

I don’t want to lose connection with my friends unless the Lord wills it, however I see your point. My friends only became my friends due to our shared love of gaming. We don’t have too much in common outside of that (at least that is the biggest one).

Maybe I do have a fear of letting go. Maybe I should let go. Or maybe I shouldn’t. I most certainly want to keep in contact at least minimally though so the Lord can use me to, as you said, be a positive influence in their lives.

JAM2b · May 1, 2026

Losing people creates grief and voids. It's a good idea to try going through the stages of grief in a healthy way. It's also good to fill your time with positive activities and people and also rest.

It is an exhausting thing to go through; it can cause depression and needs to be dealt with as you would if it were depression from another source or cause. Basically, eat well, get some physical activity, and also rest as much as you need to. Seek medical or professional help if it seems necessary.

com7fy8 · May 17, 2026

ChristIsKingofKings said:
My friends only became my friends due to our shared love of gaming.

Jesus has us loving everyone. So, I find I do well to become interested in whatever is meaningful to the person I am sharing with.

"if you love those who love you, what reward have you?" (in Matthew 5:46)

Paul would become like the ones he was reaching to >

"For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win Jews; to those who are under the law, as under the law, that I might win those who are under the law; to those who are without law, as without law (not being without law toward God, but under law toward Christ), that I might win those who are without law; to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some." (1 Corinthians 9:19-22)

Anthony2019 · Sunday at 3:43 AM

A few years ago I had to let go of a friend. I had been friends with this person for many years, had given him a lot of support, spent literally thousands of pounds subsidising his energy bills, rent payments, and providing him with free meals out and holidays. In American terms, this amounts to around 20 thousand dollars over 15 years. Not loans, but gifts of money. I spent many years feeling sorry for this "friend" and his financial situation, and wanted to do everything I could do to help.

Then one day I was talking to another friend of mine who had never met my other "friend" and knew nothing about him. I told him I had started to get very frustrated because there never seemed an end to this person's financial woes and requests for money. This friend told me to stop giving money to my other friend because he felt that I was being financially abused.

I decided not to stop giving money altogether, but wanted to explain to him that I needed to gradually reduce my payments - which I did. As a result, the friendship deteriorated very rapidly and I realised that I was nothing more than a human ATM. Also I eventually discovered that this "friend" had not been honest with me about how he was using the money. I thought it was being used to help him keep a roof over his head, to provide for heating and other essential bills. Instead it was being used to fund an abhorrent lifestyle, one which he kept a secret from me for many years until I eventually found out.

With the encouragement of my other friend, I managed to eventually sever ties with this person. I wrote a letter telling him that I wished him well, but due to the way I had been treated, I would never be able to trust him again. I told him to work on rebuilding his life, finding new connections/contacts and that one day he would understand the true meaning of friendship. I made it clear that I would welcome him back as a friend if he was genuinely sorry and wanted to change his ways, but sadly I do not think this will ever happen.

Aussie52 · Monday at 2:06 AM

ChristIsKingofKings said:
Greetings brothers and sisters in Christ.

If you’ve read my last post then you may already know why I’m asking this.

Due to personal convictions over playing certain games, I may or may not lose my online friends who I have known for 5 years now and met when I was very much outside of Christ. If you want more information on my situation, read my last post, as I’m making this one for a different reason.

Essentially, if you are willing to share, I’d like to know how some of you lost your family, friends or loved ones due to convictions (or anything else as well). How did it happen? What was the reason? How did our amazing God help you through it and in what ways did He show up for you? And how are you fairing today?

I ask because, I will admit, I really don’t want to lose my friends. But I’d rather lose them and still have a relationship with God than rebel against my Creator for their sake. I’ve never lost a long friendship like this before as I’ve never really had any friends outside of them.

But I want to follow Jesus even when it hurts (especially then).

I don’t know if I will lose my friends or not, that I leave to the Lord. But in case it does, I’d like to hear from you (again, if you’re willing, no pressure) for some reassurance, encouragement and to just generally be prepared if that does happen.

Thank you all once again

I love you all and Jesus loves you more ❤️❤️❤️.

Levi.

Hi Levi,
I recently had an email from my daughter telling me she did not want anything to do with me. She was full of criticisms about her upbringing, having to go to Church with us, me putting her in a Christian School, and so on.
You can imagine how shocked I was, it coming out of the blue.
I could not get over the bitterness in her email.
How did I cope? I had my relationship with the Lord Jesus and found His grace sufficient in my time of need.

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How do you deal with losing friends/family/loved ones

ChristIsKingofKings

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Freth

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timf

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Aussie52

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ChristIsKingofKings

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ChristIsKingofKings

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JAM2b

Comes and goes

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com7fy8

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Anthony2019

Pax et bonum!

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Aussie52

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