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My generation (Millennials) versus my mom's generation (Boomers)

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My mom recently had a birthday. She is 66 now. So...I guess...happy birthday to her then. :)

I am not complaining, but...I have noticed that there is a difference in the way our two generations think, act, feel, talk, and believe. And our lifestyles as well.

Maybe it was the way we were raised and its just a generational thing? I don't know.

I have noticed a difference between my mother and I, though: I am much more laid-back and accepting than she is (there is not a lot in life that I mind). My older sister Adrienne told mom she has a tendency to be "too judgmental" -- whatever that is supposed to mean.

Maybe we Millennials were taught growing up that we HAD to be more accepting, more tolerant, more open-minded, more loving, more kind to those around us. And those teachings stuck. Especially with me.

Maybe I am missing something here? How was my mother's generation raised and trained on how to think, feel, and act? I don't know, as I wasn't born then.

For instance, I was told that a lot of Boomers like her actually think tattoos are a sign of rebellion and should not be condoned. In their mind, rebellion equals bad things.

I, on the other hand, don't think that is actually true. I don't view tattoos the same way as she does. I actually think it is ridiculous for her to think that way about them. I have seen a lot of good, non-rebellious people wearing tattoos. What you put on your body has NOTHING to do with your personal character or how you are as a person.

I always believed people should judge others based upon their character (how they act), not on what they look like on the outside.

Are any of you guys Boomers? Maybe you can help me understand your generation better and why you guys think and feel the way you do.
 

PloverWing

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I'm a (young) Boomer, close to your mom's age. Yes, there are differences between coming of age in the 1960s/70s and coming of age in the 2000s, and those cultural differences help to shape us. But I don't think that conformity vs rebellion is one of those differences. Remember that lots of Boomers grew their hair long and protested the Vietnam War and experimented with drugs and painted their VW buses bright colors. There are differences in the causes being protested in the two generations, and there are certainly differences in fashion, but both generations have had significant numbers of people rebelling against the wrongs they see in society, or just rebelling against conformity.

I agree that tattoos are something that's changed. Growing up, the only people I knew who had tattoos were sailors. Now my priest has tattoos, as do many other younger people I know. Still seems strange to me, but how other people decorate their bodies isn't my business.

Maybe one last thing: Some of the social changes that were cutting-edge 50 years ago are (mostly) fully accepted now. Racially integrated schools, interracial marriage, women in the workplace, women in leadership, all very controversial when I was a kid, and much less controversial now. (I'm not at all minimizing the problems that remain, or the backlash that we're seeing. Still, there has been significant change for the better on these issues.) So, in both generations people were working for change, but the protests that people in your generation will march in are different from the ones that folks in the 1960s marched in.

Well, and I'm not done marching yet. I still have markers and posterboard and a good pair of sneakers. ;)
 
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Matt5

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As a boomer, tattoos weren't a thing as I was growing up. Rarely did a person have a tattoo. I don't think they add value.

In theory, the boomers are the bad-boys (girls). We screwed up society. Now our children have to fix it. In reality, we got a lot of help screwing up things from prior generations. It turns out that screwing up things is a natural part of the process. And this eventually leads to crisis. The video transcript summary below discusses this. The boomers grew up in the post-crisis high, followed by the awakening, unraveling and crisis. We are now back to the crisis period right now.

The video transcript is from a 2024 interview/discussion (hosted by Scott Harris in a Tony Robbins/Lions group setting) with historian and generational theorist Neil Howe, discussing his book The Fourth Turning Is Here.

Core Framework: Saeculum and the Four Turnings​

  • History repeats in ~80-100 year cycles (a saeculum, roughly one long human life), divided into four "turnings" (seasons):
    • High (spring): Post-crisis rebuilding, strong institutions, unity, trust (e.g., post-WWII American High under Truman/Eisenhower/Kennedy).
    • Awakening (summer): Spiritual/cultural rebellion, individualism, inner focus, tearing down outer structures (e.g., 1960s-70s Boomer-led counterculture).
    • Unraveling (autumn): Weakening institutions, rising individualism, fragmentation (e.g., 1980s-2000s).
    • Crisis (winter/Fourth Turning): Major upheaval, institutional collapse, collective urgency; society remakes itself through high-stakes decisions (e.g., American Revolution, Civil War, Great Depression/WWII).
  • Crises follow patterns: forerunners (e.g., 9/11), catalyst (e.g., 2008 financial crisis), regeneration (anomie, tribalism), climax (decisive conflict/resolution), and resolution leading to a new High.
  • History moves forward only (no rewind; entropy-like laws); crises enable renewal by forcing transformation.

The Current Fourth Turning (Crisis Era)​

  • ... .

Generational Roles and Experiences​

  • Millennials (born 1980s-90s, Artist archetype): This is their crisis—empowering chance to remake the world collaboratively. Community-oriented, reject individualism/luxury flaunting; seek institutional support, equality, sharing. Will lead post-crisis High (like GI Generation post-WWII); view democracy skeptically as gridlock favoring incumbents; drawn to decisive/populist change.
  • Gen X (born 1960s-70s, Nomad archetype): Raised as "throwaway kids," highly individualistic/self-reliant (thrived in 1980s-90s Unraveling). Contrast sharply with Millennials; may feel alienated in communal future; risk being "crushed" without adaptation.
  • Boomers (Prophet archetype): Broke institutions in youth; now elder leaders in crisis; their "every man for himself" ethos rejected by children.
  • Intersection of personal life seasons and historical seasons shapes outcomes.
Read the rest of the transcript summary here:
Grok / X - https://x.com/i/grok?conversation=2021929616437399910

 
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dms1972

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I'm a Gen X'er apparently but I never heard of this "generations" thing much when I was growing up. I don't think people always conform neatly to these generational types. My Mum was born in 1931, so what does that make her? Same with my dad he was born in 1915 I think. So does Gen X refer to children of "Boomers"? I don't think I am a typical Gen X. So I don't know how helpful this generational typing is really?
 
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dms1972

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The cultural differences between the 1960s and 2000s are not worldwide or necessarily to the same degree everywhere. We might even be seeing a slight shift towards more traditional values again in some respects amongst younger people. UK and US would differ a bit.
 
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dms1972

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Hi Jacqueline. Coming from a family were two of my older sibling might be considered "Boomers" but only in terms of the year of their birth (early 1960s) . But my parents were of an older generation.

I think the generational cohorts like "Boomer", "Gen. X", "Millennial" sometimes only very loosely describe these groups. Lots of other things are involved. Birth order in a family too can be quite a factor.

But really these labels are not types, they are just cohorts that often share some characteristics. They are more to do with sociology, than psychology.


There are things involved when comparing parents, and their offspring, and their dispositions toward life in this world (relaxed, accepting or otherwise) that isn't just sociological. Comparisons of like with like, that is between parents who are "Boomers" and parents who are "Gen X" or "Millennial", to see how each approaches parenthood for example might show differing approaches to raising of chidren, but its never going to be uniform, or in every case, or highly predictive in my view.
 
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dms1972

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Gen X (born 1960s-70s, Nomad archetype): Raised as "throwaway kids"



That doesn't apply to me at all, and I was born in the early 1970s.

Consider my earlier question in the thread, about whether "Gen Xer's" properly understood as the offspring of "Boomers"? I know quite a bit about my life from personal experience :)and won't be defining myself according to some mishmash of sociology and pop psychology.

Also the term was "Latchkey kids" - I have studied the topic, and it was more relevant to single parent families. However my mum was a home-maker, she worked for a number of years before marriage, and so was my friend's mother (other than a part time job for a couple of hours a day as a dinner lady at a local school that he himself went to), she was mostly around the house. I know because he lived across the road from me.

The true "Gen X" cohort although it is spread across the years of roughly 1965 - 1982 is much narrower than that time frame might suggest.


As regards "Boomers" there was another generational cohort (perhaps a subset of boomers) - "Generation Jones" between "Boomers" and and "Gen X" (roughly the second half of the baby boom - mid 1950s to 1960)

Unlike older Boomers, most Jonesers, particularly younger ones, did not have World War II veterans as parents (although some were Korean War veterans). Many Jonesers' parents were the Silent Generation, sandwiched between the The Greatest Generation and the Baby Boomers.​
Although born in the early 1970s, both my parents might be said to be within the "Silent Generation" cohort. Which is why I don't feel typically like a Gen Xer (though I probably shared a few musical tastes during my teens). Maybe I share more in common with "Generation Jones"?
 
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