He wasn't born into a Christian family like I was, and for me, that does not compute

I don’t know what you mean by privileged. There are all sorts of privilege. There was a headline about the Church protest where it was stated that churchgoers are entitled.

JacquelineDeane55 said:

(I have no idea where to put this. If it doesn't belong here, please move it.)

I was born into the Baptist church. My mom took me to church every Sunday since I was a baby and since I have been an adult I have gone and have not missed a Sunday (unless I was sick or something).

There is this guy I know about who was not born into a Christian family or had the privilege of having access to the Light of Christ like I had from an early age. I felt sorry for him because when he was a teenager his parents divorced and it destroyed him emotionally. He cried quite a bit. (He is one of those people that has strong emotions and is sensitive, he can be a real sweetie and that is one of the reasons I like him so much). Then he fell into darkness in his life and it was like he was drowning. I didn't know it at the time or believe me, I would have helped him find Jesus! Then he met and married a Christian girl (like me) and she introduced him to church, which I am extremely grateful to her for doing because I had been praying for him for years that he would get saved, and he finally did. Now he is living in hope and the Light for the first time in his life. It's a happy ending, praise the Lord. His spouse was able to save him from drowning. I have no doubt God set her to him to rescue him from the darkness, in a way. It's like she is a guardian angel!

I guess I just don't understand it when someone tells me they were not brought up in a Christian household, because I sure was! Ever since I was a baby, and now I am 38, so I have 38 years of church under my belt. I got saved when I was 6.

I guess it is just hard for me to believe that at one point in peoples' lives they did not have access to the Light of Christ. Does that make me privileged in some way because I always had access to it?

Are Christian families more privileged than non-Christian families because God is there?

Click to expand...

No not at all. This parable hopefully helps.

The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard

20 “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. 2 Now when he had agreed with the laborers for a denarius a day, he sent them into his vineyard. 3 And he went out about the third hour and saw others standing idle in the marketplace, 4 and said to them, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right I will give you.’ So they went. 5 Again he went out about the sixth and the ninth hour, and did likewise. 6 And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing [a]idle, and said to them, ‘Why have you been standing here idle all day?’ 7 They said to him, ‘Because no one hired us.’ He said to them, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right you will receive.’

8 “So when evening had come, the owner of the vineyard said to his steward, ‘Call the laborers and give them their wages, beginning with the last to the first.’ 9 And when those came who were hired about the eleventh hour, they each received a denarius. 10 But when the first came, they supposed that they would receive more; and they likewise received each a denarius. 11 And when they had received it, they complained against the landowner, 12 saying, ‘These last men have worked only one hour, and you made them equal to us who have borne the burden and the heat of the day.’ 13 But he answered one of them and said, ‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong. Did you not agree with me for a denarius? 14 Take what is yours and go your way. I wish to give to this last man the same as to you. 15 Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with my own things? Or is your eye evil because I am good?’ 16 So the last will be first, and the first last. For many are called, but few chosen.”
Be blessed

JacquelineDeane55 said:

I guess I just don't understand it when someone tells me they were not brought up in a Christian household,

Click to expand...

I've encountered a few people now who are "absolutely amazed" when I tell them the background I came from. I remember being an atheist as a teenager. And more than one person I've encountered seems to think I'm some kind of... "spiritual unicorn".

Now... raised (or not) in a Christian home; potentially has "advantages" and / or "disadvantages". These could consist of how well (or not) the parents understood / taught the children the gospel. (or what their version of "being Christian" may have meant).

I"m 55 years old now (have one adult son) and of what I've witnessed:
Parents who were too overtly authoritarian tended to evoke rebellion in their children. (Saw that more than once.)

Parents that... either they weren't particularly "emotionally mature" or they tended toward "needing" to "look perfect"; tended to evoke resentment in their kids both of themselves and their faith belief system. And in some instances this resentment was so severe, that their children went no contact. (I've seen that too.)

Also seen a fair share of kids "lose their faith" in college.

Also seem people "lose their faith" due to life tragedies.

On the flip side of this though; I've also seen people (like myself) who came from horrendous backgrounds and have great amounts of trust and dependance on God / Christ. Seen that with a couple of people I worked with who lived in group homes for the developmentally disabled. (Many of these residents were older and had come out of institutions. Most of them had been born between 1930 and 1960.)

So in those types of cases, they didn't grow up having to contend with the potential of parents' religious hypocrisy.
Coming from a non-religious background; I dealt with parental hypocrisy too; it just wasn't hypocrisy of a religious nature.

Now when I raised my son; I did so apart from the prevailing "Christian parenting" practices of the day. And I caught a lot of flack for that! My son was a difficult child. He has epilepsy and a neuro-developmental disorder that caused a lot of issues for him being able to take in and process information. So consequently, he wasn't particularly "well behaved". He was an extremely frustrated child attending a public school for a portion of his education. (He was homeschooled through most of high school.) And he had a lot of "melt downs". (He was classified "autism" in school so he could get the services he needed; despite that by 15, he no longer met the criteria for "ASD". Though clearly, he had a neuro-developmental disability.

He also had a very challenging childhood. We were in a catastrophic car accident when he was 8 years old and his dad committed suicide when he was 15.

He's also been hospitalized more times than I can count at this point; and he's currently on brain surgery consult #3.

Though because of all the behavioral challenges the developmental issues caused; we'd been rejected from several churches and today; he's not interested in attending any church; although we continue to have plenty of discussions about life, struggles, faith and the Bible.

I can't say I know for sure that my son is redeemed; although I suspect that he is. Beyond "having made a profession of faith" and being baptized he's "too obedient" (conscientious) to be estranged from God. He carries a lot of personal concern and conviction about such things to conclude that God isn't working in his life. (He's 24 now.)

Thus.... when people find it perplexing of others who didn't grow up in a Christian home; .... I'm not sure what I think of THAT? (Why would one assume God would / or could not save anyone He wants to?)

Do I think people who did grow up in Christian homes are "privileged"?

I would say that depends on the "quality" of the upbringing more than it's simply slapping a religious label on someone's life. There's a lot of abuse in religious circles. And if your kids come out of your parenting actually liking you; I'd say you did something right! (At least in the human context!) I've also seen secular families where the kids and parents genuinely love each other. (Even after the kids are well into adulthood.)

Knowing Jesus young is a big blessing, i agree, a bit unrelated but a lot of christians are missing one bit though, we have to be filled like the disciples at pentecost, this is so important and the enemy knows this and will attack so people don't receive this and try to make slander to anyone who talks about this.

JacquelineDeane55 said:

(I have no idea where to put this. If it doesn't belong here, please move it.)

I was born into the Baptist church. My mom took me to church every Sunday since I was a baby and since I have been an adult I have gone and have not missed a Sunday (unless I was sick or something).

There is this guy I know about who was not born into a Christian family or had the privilege of having access to the Light of Christ like I had from an early age. I felt sorry for him because when he was a teenager his parents divorced and it destroyed him emotionally. He cried quite a bit. (He is one of those people that has strong emotions and is sensitive, he can be a real sweetie and that is one of the reasons I like him so much). Then he fell into darkness in his life and it was like he was drowning. I didn't know it at the time or believe me, I would have helped him find Jesus! Then he met and married a Christian girl (like me) and she introduced him to church, which I am extremely grateful to her for doing because I had been praying for him for years that he would get saved, and he finally did. Now he is living in hope and the Light for the first time in his life. It's a happy ending, praise the Lord. His spouse was able to save him from drowning. I have no doubt God set her to him to rescue him from the darkness, in a way. It's like she is a guardian angel!

I guess I just don't understand it when someone tells me they were not brought up in a Christian household, because I sure was! Ever since I was a baby, and now I am 38, so I have 38 years of church under my belt. I got saved when I was 6.

I guess it is just hard for me to believe that at one point in peoples' lives they did not have access to the Light of Christ. Does that make me privileged in some way because I always had access to it?

Are Christian families more privileged than non-Christian families because God is there?

Click to expand...

I would say that you were not born into a Baptist church. You weren't a member of a Baptist church as a new-born baby. Baptist churches generally require potential members to have been baptised as believers. I would say that it can be helpful to be brought up with Christian parents, but it is by no means automatic; I know many Christian parents whose children are not saved, and many Christians whose parents were not Christians - mine weren't.

I guess it is just hard for me to believe that at one point in peoples' lives they did not have access to the Light of Christ. Does that make me privileged in some way because I always had access to it?

Are Christian families more privileged than non-Christian families because God is there?

Click to expand...

I'm relying on long term memory here so my figures might be incorrect.

Years ago I read in a Christian report somewhere that if both parents are Christian, the odds of the children becoming and remaining Christian are about 85%.

If it is the father alone who is Christian, the chances drop to about 55%.

If it is the mother alone, it drops right down to about 15%.

As I said my memory is hazy, so my figures may be somewhat inaccurate. But I remember being surprised at the time I read the report by the influence of the parents and in particular the paternal factor in Christian retention in families.

I'm one of those rare cases who did not have a Christian background, although my parents (particulary my mother) made me go to Sunday School when I was young. But they didn't go to church. My father was atheist (lost his Catholic faith), and my mother was nominally Anglican.

Later though God used my limited Sunday School exposure when the time came to get my attention. One problem these days is that a large part of the population have no Christian exposure whatsoever apart from possibly a local Christian church building which they might happen to see as they drive or walk around the place.

In support of my argument above I went looking for some figures. There are some differences in the cited statisics, but what is obvious is the father's potential influence.

Another survey found that if a child is the first person in a household to become a Christian, there is a 3.5% probability everyone else in the household will follow. If the mother is the first to become a Christian, there is a 17% probability everyone else in the household will follow. However, when the father is first, there is a 93% probability everyone else in the household will follow.

Click to expand...

Eye-opening statistics:
If mother and father attend assembly/church regularly:
• 33% of their children will end up attending church regularly
• 25% of their children will end up not attending at all
If mother attends church regularly. Father does not attend church at all:
• 2% of their children will end up attending church regularly
• 60% of their children will end up not attending at all
If father attends church regularly. Mother does not attend church at all:
• 44% of their children will end up attending church regularly
• 34% of their children will end up not attending at all
If the mother is the first to become a Christian in a household:
• there is a 17% probability that everyone in the household will follow.
If the father is the first to become a Christian in a household:
• there is a 93% probability that everyone in the household will follow.

Click to expand...

JacquelineDeane55 said:

(I have no idea where to put this. If it doesn't belong here, please move it.)

I was born into the Baptist church. My mom took me to church every Sunday since I was a baby and since I have been an adult I have gone and have not missed a Sunday (unless I was sick or something).

There is this guy I know about who was not born into a Christian family or had the privilege of having access to the Light of Christ like I had from an early age. I felt sorry for him because when he was a teenager his parents divorced and it destroyed him emotionally. He cried quite a bit. (He is one of those people that has strong emotions and is sensitive, he can be a real sweetie and that is one of the reasons I like him so much). Then he fell into darkness in his life and it was like he was drowning. I didn't know it at the time or believe me, I would have helped him find Jesus! Then he met and married a Christian girl (like me) and she introduced him to church, which I am extremely grateful to her for doing because I had been praying for him for years that he would get saved, and he finally did. Now he is living in hope and the Light for the first time in his life. It's a happy ending, praise the Lord. His spouse was able to save him from drowning. I have no doubt God set her to him to rescue him from the darkness, in a way. It's like she is a guardian angel!

I guess I just don't understand it when someone tells me they were not brought up in a Christian household, because I sure was! Ever since I was a baby, and now I am 38, so I have 38 years of church under my belt. I got saved when I was 6.

I guess it is just hard for me to believe that at one point in peoples' lives they did not have access to the Light of Christ. Does that make me privileged in some way because I always had access to it?

Are Christian families more privileged than non-Christian families because God is there?

Click to expand...

Of course it's beneficial to grow up in a Christian home and have Christian values instilled from childhood.
Still there are people raised like that that go astray.
For me, I wasn't raised like that.
My family were believers but when my 16 year old brother died my father never went to church again. I was 7 years old.
He didn't blame God and he still had respect for Christians but he didn't go to church.

I would say it is certainly beneficial, but its not a 100% guarantee.

Some are tempted, swayed or stray later in life for various reasons.

People are still people (even Christians) and not without flaws. In their upbringing, some run into issues at home or at church that drive a wedge between them and the Christian faith and they leave home and Christianity as soon as they can. Some to never return.

This survey is more formal. It's the National Church Life Survey in Australia.


It doesn't give the chances of children following in their parents footsteps, but it does indicate that when both parents go to church, children are more likely to continue themselves. In short, parents are their first and most important factor in their decision to follow Christ.

This means that those who have no Christian role model to follow at all are at a signigicant disadvantage when it comes to becoming Christians.

It gives examples of some other role models. In this category the 'minister / pastor / priest' has the most influence (71%). That was certainly the case for me, by which I mean my original Presbyterian pastor. Catholic priests have had some influence but he was the most significant by far.

I could write a book about my own experiences. I lived both. I lived with my mother, a devout Christian. I regularly visited with my father, a non-Christian.

I was the middle sibling. I have a younger brother and an older brother. The three of us went our own way in adulthood, but I am the only one who came back to Christianity.

My takeaway is that we are shaped by our environment. All influences are factors in our development. Even in the same household, the result can be vastly different from one sibling to the next. What one considers to be a positive influence, another considers to be a negative. Our unique experiences as human beings, even in the same household, can steer us to different conclusions, and in different directions.

My personal view of my Christian upbringing is that it has been an invaluable influence in my life. It has guided me even when I was living in the world. I know for a fact it is guiding my siblings, but they are not professed Christians.

There are some hard truths from our family's past that have influenced both of my brothers and turned them away from Christianity. Even their own upbringing, which was positive, when seen in the light of familial revelations, is rejected. (I'm skipping over a ton of history.)

Is it beneficial to grow up with Christian influence? Definitely, but it doesn't guarantee an outcome.

The Holy Spirit can bridge the gap, no matter your upbringing.

He has a powerful testimony & you are witness to it. It has become part of yours

We who were born into Christian households are not born into a bubble. The world is a dark place. & so is our own heart.

But yes we have a great privilege

Also it’s hard to imagine coming from a household truly hostile to God. I was thinking earlier how would you tell your family you’ve become a Christian???? That’s a topic for another thread

David Lamb said:

I would say that you were not born into a Baptist church. You weren't a member of a Baptist church as a new-born baby. Baptist churches generally require potential members to have been baptised as believers. I would say that it can be helpful to be brought up with Christian parents, but it is by no means automatic; I know many Christian parents whose children are not saved, and many Christians whose parents were not Christians - mine weren't.

Click to expand...

AMEN! 100%

When I was only four a young German woman taught me to pray in German.. I secretly prayed for years. I knew my older sister and both parents were very critical. I tried to avoid criticism When i was 18 I became a Mormon. I stayed trapped in Mormonism for 12 years, but then started reading my Bible. God AMAZED me with His word, Some people claim to be saved yet never give up sinful habits but God changes us as we conform to His Word.
.

JacquelineDeane55 said:

(I have no idea where to put this. If it doesn't belong here, please move it.)

I was born into the Baptist church. My mom took me to church every Sunday since I was a baby and since I have been an adult I have gone and have not missed a Sunday (unless I was sick or something).

There is this guy I know about who was not born into a Christian family or had the privilege of having access to the Light of Christ like I had from an early age. I felt sorry for him because when he was a teenager his parents divorced and it destroyed him emotionally. He cried quite a bit. (He is one of those people that has strong emotions and is sensitive, he can be a real sweetie and that is one of the reasons I like him so much). Then he fell into darkness in his life and it was like he was drowning. I didn't know it at the time or believe me, I would have helped him find Jesus! Then he met and married a Christian girl (like me) and she introduced him to church, which I am extremely grateful to her for doing because I had been praying for him for years that he would get saved, and he finally did. Now he is living in hope and the Light for the first time in his life. It's a happy ending, praise the Lord. His spouse was able to save him from drowning. I have no doubt God set her to him to rescue him from the darkness, in a way. It's like she is a guardian angel!

I guess I just don't understand it when someone tells me they were not brought up in a Christian household, because I sure was! Ever since I was a baby, and now I am 38, so I have 38 years of church under my belt. I got saved when I was 6.

I guess it is just hard for me to believe that at one point in peoples' lives they did not have access to the Light of Christ. Does that make me privileged in some way because I always had access to it?

Are Christian families more privileged than non-Christian families because God is there?

Click to expand...

To have the light of Christ is to be guided by the Holy Spirit that a Christian receives at baptism, and who receives God’s grace into His salvation in Christ Jesus. It has nothing to do with being raised in church. It is great to have the experience of being raised in church, so don’t get me wrong.

However, God Himself selects those in Jesus who will be His children. Look at these scriptures:

Ephesians 1:4-5 KJV
4 According as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love:
5 Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will,

Romans 8:29-30 KJV
29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.
30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified.

You lack understanding by asking if christian families have more privilege than non Christian families. Many of God’s children come from non Christian families- it has to do with God’s selection.

Unfortunately there will be many people who were raised in Christian families that will not be saved. Jesus said let the wheat grow with the tare - this is speaking of those people growing together in Christian churchs.

Matthew 13:30 KJV
Let both grow together until the harvest: and in the time of harvest I will say to the reapers, Gather ye together first the tares, and bind them in bundles to burn them: but gather the wheat into my barn.

There are many children in this world that grew up in abusive families, many grew up in homes where God was never taught, many were kidnapped and found after many years or were never found, many people suffer mental and medical problems - these are the called. Not the privileged!

There is a suffering for Christ - that is like a seal or identification of who are the Children of God. It’s not easy to go through this suffering God requires- but if a person has not experienced this suffering, then that’s a good identification that they might not be saved - pray and ask God.

But, Romans 8:17-18 KJV says,
17 And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.
18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

The suffering is for the purpose of refinement to be conformed to the image of Christ for producing the Fruit of the Spirit that God desires.

1 Peter 4:12-13 KJV
12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.

Isaiah 48:10-11 KJV
10 Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver; I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction.
11 For mine own sake, even for mine own sake, will I do it: for how should my name be polluted? and I will not give my glory unto another.

In no way can we endure such trials, and God knows this - God takes the hand of His children and guides them through each trial by His Spirit, to accomplish His will.

God bless you!

My parents were professing Christians but they didn't go to church and didn't live Godly lives.

I went to church by myself as a child. Other people lead me to the Lord. I have maintained my faith without my family.

God pursues people regardless of what their family does. Each person is responsible for their own decisions and we are all to work out our own salvation. That applies whether or not our parents raise us in church.

Is it easier? Maybe. As far as teaching and encouragement, it can be. Or if done in a bad way or a way the kid can't perceive what is meant, it might do more harm than good. I've known plenty of people who came to know the Lord or claim their faith as their own after leaving their family of origin or not having a Christian upbringing.