My mother having mysterious pain

I just back from an appointment with the oncologist and the chemo appointment. The good news is that the chemo did actually work; the markers for it in her bloodstream are down. The problem is, it’s taking too much out of her. The doctor ordered a small dose of chemo and another round of medical hydration and sent us home.

The doctor said that increasing the amount of protein in my mom’s diet would help with the edema so we discussed options as a family to get her some more of that. I recommended milk, but that coats her throat so we might have to have multiple glasses and wash the milk down with juice. My brother is looking into juices and protein shakes.

Thanks for prayers for everyone who has been praying for us.

Unfortunately that was only a brief reprieve. We just got out of the visit with the oncologist today, nothing is good. The chemo is not working at all, the tumor markers in the bloodstream have gone up, and my mother is too weak to walk or even stand for longer than brief periods without help. We had to call hospice for her so they can bring a hospital bed so my mom can sleep downstairs tonight. We cannot get her up and down the stairs to the master bedroom that is upstairs anymore. Please pray for the safe arrival of the bed tonight.

My dad is now going to clinical trial doctors trying to save my mom’s life, and I’ve decided to let him mess around with it. He needs a distraction to keep him going. But for all intents and purposes, she’s dying, and her body is going downhill fast. She’s lost a lot of ability in a month.

I’m okay so far, just some sore muscles from having to lift my mother in and out of the car from her wheelchair, and the increased appetite that comes from that. But my dad is not going to take this well. One expects to lose their parent to death in the normal course of human affairs, but nobody expects to lose their wife. She’s a Christian and we’ll see her again, but it seems that the Lord wants to take her home.

Hopefully the hospice people will help take some of the load off of us. The phone is ringing off the hook here and I’m tired.

The bed arrived safely on Tuesday afternoon. We now know when hospice is coming, so the three of us can stabilize our schedules and try to get back to "normal" again, instead of "adrenaline cycling crisis mode". I also called our pastor because my mom wants him to do the end-of-life spiritual support. (The hospice people offered us a chaplain and a social worker and my mom declined them both, so I'm going to respect that.) We now have a hoist called a Hoyer lift to help us move my mom from chair to bed without breaking our backs.

Frankly from my perspective that's a relief. I don't want people nosing around into me and my dad's long ugly history, and both of us are taking care of her the best we can.

The next things I'm thinking about is that we have an ultrasound appointment for my mom's legs, and I'm thinking about whether we can take my mom to church on Sunday safely. Please pray that we can get my mom to church. It would help her to be there and in the company of fellow believers in Christ.

The other silver lining is that there is a hospice nurse at our church whom I was given the phone number for, and I would like her and my mom to meet. Talking with her has helped me understand the hospice situation and process a lot better, as well as talking with the CHHA and the nurses. I thank the Lord for his provision of help.

My mother has gone home to be with the Lord. She left us Friday evening.

Please see the follow-up thread here: My mother died, kind of suddenly

I would appreciate it if you would please direct your responses to that thread if you can. Thanks. I understand that the OP of that thread is a bit long because I felt the need to tell the story of what happened, but if you've been praying here, I'm not going to be offended if you just scroll down and type.