Why Have Children? The Global Population Decline and Human Happiness

My American grandmother, who raised seven children in Floral Park, New York, loved to tell people with a big smile, “Kids come with instructions!” My Cuban grandmother, who raised fourteen children—first in Havana and then in the US—told me when I asked her if she always wanted fourteen kids, “Oh no! I wanted twelve. But God answered my prayers and even gave me two more!” Their words and their witness communicated a mentality of abundance: God provided them with everything they needed to raise their children, including many siblings for their children.

As a young woman in my twenties with multiple degrees from Ivy League universities, I believed that I needed to plan my career and family together, optimizing both according to my preferences. As I entered my thirties, my career ascended, but my dreams of family life faded; I was always the bridesmaid but never the bride.

But thanks to my two grandmothers, who raised large, loving families, I was always surrounded by aunts, uncles, cousins, and my own three brothers along with their children. If I were single and childless—not by choice but by circumstance—I would fully embrace being an older cousin, an aunt, and a great babysitter to my friend’s kids.

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