Matthew 19:29 VS Deuteronomy 5:16

I'll pray. If the things God has said contradicts themselves in your mind, then only God can help.

Chrystal-J said:

One is old testament and the other is new testament. I thought maybe the old is replaced with the new.

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The passage that comes to remembrance is something Paul said, Romans 12:18.

I think it can be reconciled by the fact that if our parents command something that causes us to sin, we don't have to do it.

One can honour parents and still leave...

Chrystal-J said:

I want to honor my parents, but they are making it extremely difficult. My mother is an atheist who seems to despise religion

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While He was still speaking to the crowds, behold, His mother and brothers were standing outside, seeking to speak to Him. Someone said to Him, “Look, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside, seeking to speak to You.” But Jesus replied to the one who was telling Him and said, “Who is My mother, and who are My brothers?” And extending His hand toward His disciples, He said, “Behold: My mother and My brothers! For whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven, he is My brother, and sister, and mother.” Matthew 12:46-50

“Do not think that I came to bring peace on the earth; I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I came to TURN A MAN AGAINST HIS FATHER, AND A DAUGHTER AGAINST HER MOTHER, AND A DAUGHTER-IN-LAW AGAINST HER MOTHER-IN-LAW; and A PERSON’S ENEMIES WILL BE THE MEMBERS OF HIS HOUSEHOLD.“The one who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; and the one who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me. Matthew 10:34-37

But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may prove yourselves to be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Even the tax collectors, do they not do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Even the Gentiles, do they not do the same? Therefore you shall be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. Matthew 5:44-48

Chrystal-J said:

And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life. (Matthew 19: 29)
VS
"Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the LORD your God is giving you. (Deuteronomy 5:16)

I want to honor my parents, but they are making it extremely difficult. My mother is an atheist who seems to despise religion. She told me I was making a mistake taking my grandkids to church. She called me insulting names. It was just one thing after another. She doesn't understand why I go to church and it seems to irritate her. I want nothing more than to honor my parents, but they make it very hard. I'm almost to the point where I don't want to go to their house anymore.

The bible says these two different things regarding parents and I don't know which way to go.

P.S. Prayers appreciated!

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Jesus was speaking to Israel in Matthew, and at that time, the promised kingdom was at hand.

Meaning the Tribulation was coming.

Now, we are under a different dispensation.

Paul repeats the commandment in the NT, so it's still valid.


But in the NT a greater loyalty is revealed, one that puts the Fifth Commandment (Exod. 20:12) in a subordinate place.


God must come first, before parents, before spouse, before children, before anything. Anything that keeps us from God and from His will for us must be put aside regardless of the cost to us. Thus the extreme “hate speech” Jesus uses. He will go on to speak about the reproach of building a tower but not finishing it, and will conclude by saying that we must count the cost and give up all our possessions – that is, anything that holds us.

But, we may ask, what about turning the cheek and walking the second mile with people who oppose our following God? Yes, but we only have two cheeks, and we are told only to walk a second mile. If in good conscience and with discerning prayer we conclude that a situation is holding us back from following the Lord whole-souled as we should, then there is a time to say enough is enough and move on.

Chrystal-J said:

I can see the point of Romans 12:18, but there is also 1 Corinthians 15:33
33 Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
I only use this passage because I end up leaving there in a bad mood.

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The two passages act in harmony, be at peace with others as much as it concerns you. If it's not possible for you to be at peace, then there's that balance.

Chrystal-J said:

I called off my visit today. I'll try spacing out my visits and see if that helps. (Or at least I won't have to deal with their attitude as often.)

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Do you think part of it is grief over the loss of your sister?

Chrystal-J said:

It's possible that made things worse. She's always been a negative person, but I almost walked out when she said I shouldn't take the grandkids to church "because all priests are perverts". (And I was "weird" because I like mystery-type books.) There was just no end to it. She even insulted my boyfriend who came with me by complaining about his teeth (he's going to the dentist, but isn't done with the treatment yet). She said straight to his face that she "noticed" his teeth needed work.
My dad gets his digs in too, but he usually sits on the porch, so I don't talk to him that much.

Sorry for venting, but I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place because I can't seem to please them, but want to visit them because of their age.

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Some people are just set in their ways. I think they use your faith as an excuse to use you as their verbal punching bag. It’s unfortunate but this has been going on for a long time. I just would not feed into it and try to ignore it. Or just simply leave when they start up. I’d be interested to see what their reaction to this would be. If they truly want to see you, I would hope they would catch on and stop this pattern.

Chrystal-J said:

it seems like the more I pray for them, the worse it gets.

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I would recommend praying about the situation with a church leader...

There may be a spiritual component that needs to be resisted.

Chrystal-J said:

I've heard that extreme negativity attracts demonic spirits, which put the household into a downward spiral. I pray the rosary for my parents to convert to Christianity (especially my mom).
I'm just at the point where it's unbearable.

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Have a chat to your priest...