Can a Wedding be Sinful?

I don't find it sinful, but definitely unnecessary. Never imagined a wedding costing near that much, but I'm not married either. That's about two years of college tuition!

norak said:

I have read that the average cost of a wedding is $22,000. With this cost, surely the couple is focusing on extravagance. Doesn't too much extravagance go against Biblical principles? A Christian couple can have a very simple wedding. Any cost above about $1000 is not a necessity but a luxury.

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I'm making my dress (for about $150, the cheapest I could do it), making our own invitations, cutting our guest list by half and possibly offending some people, having a potluck reception, no wedding cake, no flowers, NO PHOTOGRAPHER! using a church I used to be a member of for both the wedding and the reception, and STILL everything is above $1000.

I don't know where you live that you can have a real wedding that is more than just the immediate family for $1000, but that's unreasonable.

I would say the cut off line would be if the bride's dress cost more than $500, and the whole wedding cost more than $5,000.

Anything can be sinful in excess. Anything at all.

I got married for a few thousand dollars. And this was a BASIC ceremony! My dress only cost $400-ish, and the tux rental was $150, my shoes were $20, rental of the chapel was $800 I think, Photographer we got at a STEAL for $500 (typically you spend well over $1000 if not a couple grand on this) the pastor was free (DH's grandfather), and the rest was reception/simple flowers, covered by my mum.

The only way we were able to keep costs THIS low? Was because we only had <20 people at the wedding.

After having gone through planning and executing a wedding? I can totally understand how people have $10,000 weddings or more. Because it is such a special day, and the pictures are important memories So making it beautiful so you have those special memories? I understand how that can be important. And feeding/entertaining your guests? Obviously also important because some people travel SO far to be there, its nice to have something for them.

ANYTHING in excess though is sinful, so here is what I think:

If you have to go into debt to make your wedding happen? That is bad. There is NO reason to go into debt over a wedding. None whatsoever.

But if you can afford it? I really don't see a big deal, it's just a person's choice of what they want to remember the day like and what they want to see in those pictures (and how good they want those pictures to be )

$22,000 wow.

No way I would spend that much money on my wedding unless I just happened to become a multi-millionare between then and now. And I don't see that happening.

I think the sinfulness of all of this is people make the wedding too important. The wedding is a ceremony, a declaration of promises, and a celibration of your love.

The important thing is if you uphold those promises, not the fact that you can make them.

"Beautiful wedding, invite me to the marriage." -God

$22,000 isn't that much...I know my brother's wedding cost about twice that...I can't understand cheap weddings. I'm hoping my wedding won't cost too much, but I refuse to have a cheap-looking wedding.

NotHardcore said:

$22,000 isn't that much...I know my brother's wedding cost about twice that...I can't understand cheap weddings. I'm hoping my wedding won't cost too much, but I refuse to have a cheap-looking wedding.

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Well, I enjoyed my "cheap looking wedding" because the wedding didn't mean squat next to the marriage. I was too busy getting married to the love of my life to care

Excessiveness and wastefulnes sin IMHO are sinful.

I'm thinking eloping may be a good idea for me. Just to not spend thousands on a wedding.

I also cannot have a cheap looking wedding but I also really won't be comfortable spending lots on a one. It's not financially impossible but I don't feel as though it's worth it at this point. I may change that view, who knows.

After discussing possibilities a wonderful post ceremony dinner with immediate family sounds like a good idea.

The idea of having a reception party at a later date for all the people you didn't invite to the intimate thing sounds good to me too.

Morning~Glory said:

Well, I enjoyed my "cheap looking wedding" because the wedding didn't mean squat next to the marriage. I was too busy getting married to the love of my life to care

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Nothing cheap looking about this!

Well it WAS cheap, that's what I'm saying

The bulk of the cost was the reception food, everything else was as cheap as we could find it.

So I sort of get a little irked (forgive me) when I see people saying they don't want cheap "looking" weddings. Cheap doesn't mean cheap looking though.

My husband and I couldn't afford a $20,000 wedding if we saved up for 10 years.

I would elope too, but neither my family nor his think that an elopement is a proper marriage, thus in their eyes we would be living in sin. They also think that family only weddings are not valid either.

Morning~Glory said:

Well, I enjoyed my "cheap looking wedding" because the wedding didn't mean squat next to the marriage. I was too busy getting married to the love of my life to care

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I didn't think yours looked cheap-looking at all, Lynn . I thought it was intimate and classy. Yours was cheap because you didn't have a lot of people and you got good deals on the photographer and minister and such. I'm talking about big weddings that are done for very little money and show it (like where the people could have made it look way better (and had the money to do so), but didn't (or where they didn't have a lot of money and stretched it so thin on things they didn't need that it looked worse than it should have)). There's also cases where plenty of money was spent, but the wedding didn't show it (my brother's wedding didn't look that great, in my opinion. The flowers weren't impressive, the reception room was small and boring, and I absolutely hated the cheapo-looking pillar thingie they got married under).

I'm just really picky about the way a wedding looks...it's an important day, and I feel it should look, feel, and be classy. Heck, even mandatory EXIT signs in wedding venues bug me. I want no alcohol at the reception, no current music or macarena type music (oldies and a select few recent artists only), no garter-throwing, etc. I've actually loosened up a bit about weddings.....I used to think that DJs were bad and that only string groups should be used.

I know I just had my feelings hurt there for a second Then I got over it, lol.

Morning~Glory said:

I know I just had my feelings hurt there for a second Then I got over it, lol.

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I felt so bad and was afraid I had hurt you (cuz I like you!) . I wasn't thinking of your wedding at all (cuz yours was classy). I was thinking of the horrible weddings I see on this show called "Bridezillas" (don't know if it airs in Canada), where the brides are cheap, bratty, waste money on stupid stuff (like 3 different tiaras or a tricked-out limo) and then have massive weddings (like 10 bridesmaids (wearing hooker-y dresses), 11 ushers, 3 junior bridesmaids, 2 junior grooms (wth?), 2 flower girls, and a ring-bearer) with way too many people invited in a community center with no decorations (or they get fake flowers when they could have gotten real ones and then complain about how bad the fakes look ), etc...... Basically, it bugs me when people don't make such an important day as nice as it can be. They get over-ambitious trying to include tons of stuff (or every person they have ever met in their entire life), so they spread themselves and their funds too thin and end up with a cranky bride and a tacky-looking wedding. Drives me nuts .

Does the $22,000 include the honeymoon?

I know that if I get married, my wedding will be as cheap as possible I'd much rather chug the money into the honeymoon or into furniture or rent or something.

Wow Morning Glory, BEAUTIFUL pictures, and gorgeous wedding.

I think that if you spend thousands of dollars on a dress and go into debt doing so, that is sinful.

My wedding dress was on sale for $200. It was regular $1200! I would never have paid that! For me, that was a line though, maybe for someone else their line would have been elsewhere. I was not going to spend a lot of money on how I looked and all the flowers and such, but my wedding did cost $30,000 because my parents flew relatives out and put them up in hotels. I was blessed to have my family with me, and that got expensive. If it wasn't for that it would have been under $5,000 for sure. I guess what I am saying is that it becomes sinful in my opinion when all of this money is spent to make it LOOK extravagant. Travel expenses do add up and I think that helping guests with that is acceptable if you have the money and desire to do so.

norak said:

I have read that the average cost of a wedding is $22,000. With this cost, surely the couple is focusing on extravagance. Doesn't too much extravagance go against Biblical principles? A Christian couple can have a very simple wedding. Any cost above about $1000 is not a necessity but a luxury.

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Technically wouldn't any cost above a Marriage License (About $50-$80). And Justice of the Peace in the Office of the recorder be a luxury ?

First post around here!
Didn't know this existed.. cool!
Anyways on the subject, it truly depends on one's culture, and one's expenses... Personally we should be very careful to say someone is 'sinning' if they have a wedding that cost a lot of money... Eh.. to each their own I guess... I agree with all of you, what matters is the marriage not the wedding. However, the wedding SHOULD be a beautiful thing filled with personal touches , this doesn't mean it has to be cheap nor expensive... I guess it totally depends on a bride and grooms vision and how much money their willing to fork over...

Now that we got engaged we've been looking at costs of weddings.

Its expensive but no where near $22,000.

I think we could have a rather nice one for under $5k.

Luther073082 said:

Now that we got engaged we've been looking at costs of weddings.

Its expensive but no where near $22,000.

I think we could have a rather nice one for under $5k.

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There is a show on the style network- whose wedding is it anyways?- anyways there was a bride and groom whose wedding cost 1 MILLION DOLLARS!