How would you minister to survivors of childhood sexual molestation...

God_Owned · Jul 18, 2006

I was just listening to Gregory Dickow talking about how people are far less likely to make rational decisions if they are emotionally out of balance. This ties into what I'm saying about the necessity to heal the soul. A person would certainly be emotionally out of balance if their soul's emotional governor is suck wide open, stuck shut or is damaged.

^_^

KingZzub · Jul 18, 2006

Renew your mind is the key. Your thinking determines your emotions, not the other way around.

Cheers,
|ZZ|

God_Owned · Jul 18, 2006

Zzub said:
Renew your mind is the key. Your thinking determines your emotions, not the other way around.

Cheers,
|ZZ|

Well, I guess if you ever come to Chicago, you can take your point of view with Pastor Dickow, who by the way is submitted to one of your all time favorites, Kenneth Copeland.

What you've said is only part of the picture. Thinking may determine your emotions if your mental faculties are working as they should. Your ability to make decisions is impaired if you have a damaged mind (not to be confused with brain) which is part of your soul. In other words, due to damage from childhood molestation and abuse, many people's minds do not possess the necessary mental facility to bring their emotions into line with rational thought.

I've received several e-mail back from KCM attesting to the fact that people who have been molested and abused never seem to get over it. I quote, "... they never seem to get over it." I'm telling you why many of them never seem to get overt it, but how all of them might be afforded an opportunity to really get over it.

As I've previously pointed out. renew does not equal restore. You renew by washing with the Word. On the other hand, restoration is accomplished through healing. You will find, if you do a Word study on this subject, that washing and healing are never used to denote the same thing. Heal and restore are often used together while washed and renewed are often used together. I refer you back to my Post 15, this thread.

People do suffer from tangible damage to their soul as a result of childhood molestation and abuse as well as from other traumatic events. As a result, their souls need healed just like a broken arm needs healed.

You can renew you mind with the Word of God until the cows come home, but it will not have the desired effect until the soul is healed and made whole. Washing the mind with the word will only be effective to the extent that the soul, mind, will and emotions are in tact and functioning as they were designed to.

:amen:

KingZzub · Jul 18, 2006

I disagree.

At no point in the Word is an exception made for people who are abused to be in the Word, renewing their mind, and serving the Lord with joy.

I don't know who Dickow is, but he is human and can be wrong. You asked how I minister to these people - I am giving my answer.

Have I seen people totally set free? Yes, consistently.

Remember: He will keep in perfect peace those whose mind is stayed on Him (Isaiah 26.3). There is no 3b that says "unless you have been abused, then you need some sort of esoteric healing."

I would love you to study out your "renew" "restore" "washed" "healed" in the Greek - your conclusion will possibly be wildly different.

Cheers

|ZZ|

God_Owned · Jul 18, 2006

I disagree.

At no point in the Word is an exception made for people who are abused to be in the Word, renewing their mind, and serving the Lord with joy.

I agree with youthat everyone's mind needs to be renewed withthe Word of God. I never said that the mind shouldn't be renewed, I said that the soul, (mind, will and emotions) might need to be healed in order for the washing to have its desired effect.

The Bible is clear about the need to heal the broken heart and this is not the same act as renewing the mind, but is necessary for the successful renewal of the mind. I have well supported this in the Word.

I don't know who Dickow is, but he is human and can be wrong. You asked how I minister to these people - I am giving my answer.

OK, so you're hman and can be wrong too. In this case I know Pastor Dockow to be correct. I appreciate you answer and I've responded in love and in the Word. I'm in the hopes that if we contiuue this conversation that it be done in the Word and in love.

Have I seen people totally set free? Yes, consistently.

You may well have seen people totally set free. Not everyone suffers the same damage or type of damage. Some people just need to wash their minds, while others need a healing and then a washing. Further, the emotional experience of things like being born-again, people excited with expectancy when being prayed for, are often confused with restoration of the soul, but in time this does not prove out. In my case, I would continue to wash my mind with the trod and would to only receive moderate shot term improvement. My heart first needed to be healed. Copeland's staff has confirmed to me that a high percentage of people who were molested and abused continue to suffer in spite of their best efforts.

Remember: He will keep in perfect peace those whose mind is stayed on Him (Isaiah 26.3). There is no 3b that says "unless you have been abused, then you need some sort of esoteric healing."

It's kind of hard to keep a broken mind on anything. Further, it does not say that all will be able to keep their minds on anything in their current condition. Did Jesus tell the Gadarene demoniac to keep his mind stayed on God. No! Jesus first restored the man's mind to the man's self-control. Restored is used in conjunction with healing and deliverance.

I would love you to study out your "renew" "restore" "washed" "healed" in the Greek - your conclusion will possibly be wildly different.

I have done just that for many months now and everything confirms my conclusions. I'm offering you something I know will help others. I can only hope you will have the light to do something with it.

:wave:

KingZzub · Jul 18, 2006

I can't see any reason to change what I am teaching, considering I have a whole range of testimonies of people who have been totally set free.

Thanks,
|ZZ|

God_Owned · Jul 18, 2006

Zzub said:
I can't see any reason to change what I am teaching, considering I have a whole range of testimonies of people who have been totally set free.

Thanks,
|ZZ|

Then keep teaching what you're teaching.

:wave:

God_Owned · Jul 19, 2006

The greatest abuse of power is when an adult uses their position of authority and their physical, mental and emotional superiority to sexually molest and abuse children. This type of abuse occurs millions of times a day in this country alone.

In particular, child molestation and abuse by a parent is the highest form of betrayal that a child can experience.

Regardless of who the perpetrator is, child molestation and abuse is a destructive violation of a childs body and soul (mind, will and emotions) at every level.

There are things about childs soul which are self-evident to anyone who has been a dedicated parent or clinically observant.

Children are most susceptible to damage because their heart is, tender, developing, extremely impressionable and trusting, wide open to receive, especially from their trusted parents.

Parents are the primary sculptors of their childs mind will and emotions. The younger a child is, the easier it is to help or hurt their soul.

A child is made by God to trust their parents. In learning to trust Godly parents, children form a propensity for trusting God. Godly parents realize their most important roll in their childs life is to allow God to use them as their childs stepping stone to receiving Jesus as their Savior.

Children initially learn how, and what to think from their parents. They form lasting emotional attitudes through emotional ties to parents. Their sense of personal will as well as their intellectual, decision making and physical abilities come from their parents. They also derive their initial sense of courage and fear from their parents.

Parental love nourishes the heart of the young, while hatred and evil acts shut off a childs love trust and affection for their parents and engenders spitefulness, anger, and hatred.

Abuse received from a parent is particularly damaging to a child because of the parents position of authority, and their special place in the childs heart.

Consider the severity of damage done to a defenseless childs wide open heart, which is expecting to receive parental love, but instead receives a violent sexual assault on their body and soul from the trusted parent who is supposed to love them.

When a childs soul has been damaged, their mind, will and emotions have literally suffered some degree of tangible damage, just as certainly as a person would receive tangible brain damage if they suffered a severe blow to the head. Child sexual molestation and abuse is a violent attack on the childs soul rendering devastating and lasting damage. Gods Word leaves no doubt of the severe damage sustained when a heart is wounded and broken.

In Psalm 147:3 He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds", wounds is translated from the noun 'atstsebeth (ats-tseh'-beth) (Strong #: 6094) which means injury, wound, pain, hurt, sorrow.

The childs soul is crushed. Their sense of free will is striped by an overpowering violent force. Their confidence in their courage is shattered by fear.

Their young impressionable mind, the eye of their soul, is blinded to happiness. They have difficulty getting a fix on reality. Their crippled mental faculties produce irrational emotionally based decisions. Unforgiveness can eat away at the life of a molested and abused child.

The effects of a broken heart might include, but not limited to unexplained confusion, irrational anxiety and fear, diminished sense of self worth, mood swings, withdrawal, depression, bed wetting, nightmares, sudden unexplained aggressiveness or rebellion, irrational sudden fear of specific things, people, places, etc., stomach aches, head-aches, psychosomatic ailments, difficulty concentrating, serious depression, inability to trust others, serious confusion regarding sexual identity and compulsive self destructive behaviors, like alcohol and/or drug use, eating disorders, promiscuity, self inflicted injuries.

Abused children desire to hide the fact they were abused and deny subsequent problems because of embarrassment and shame.

Survivors of molestation and abuse are left feeling defenseless, unable to help themselves. They also lack a strong sense of self-determination, believing their future is in the hands of another. This lack of self-confidence causes them to question their courage, causing them to avoid, rather than confront, physical, intellectual and emotional challenges.

They rarely ask for help, inhibited by shame and mistrust of authority figures. Without help, they remain a prisoner of their own tortured soul, surviving on a steady diet of fear, hate and sense of helplessness.

No matter how hard they try, happiness escapes them.

It is saddening to know that the voluminous number people who request help from Clergy only represent a miniscule portion of those needing help. It is also saddening to hear from people like the KCM staff that most of these people never seem to get over the affects of childhood molestation and abuse.

Their souls rarely receives the healing needed because most don't ask for help and because of a total misconception of the nature of this damage and the failure of people to discern the difference between how healing and washing is used in the Bible.

Jesus has provided the answer.

By His stripes our souls are healed! We just need to receive it by faith.

:wave:

God_Owned · Jul 23, 2006

How many would see friendship as an important component of ministering to victims of molestation?
:wave:

God_Owned · Jul 23, 2006

[FONT=Palatino, Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif][SIZE=+2]Report: Pedophilia more common among 'gays'
[FONT=Palatino, Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif][SIZE=+1]Research purports to reveal 'dark side' of homosexual culture[/SIZE][/FONT]
[SIZE=-1]Posted: April 29, 2002
1:00 a.m. Eastern

[/SIZE]
By Jon Dougherty
[SIZE=-1]© 2002 WorldNetDaily.com [/SIZE][FONT=Palatino, Book Antiqua, Times New Roman, Georgia, Times]

Child molestation and pedophilia occur far more commonly among homosexuals than among heterosexuals on a per capita basis, according to a new study.

"Overwhelming evidence supports the belief that homosexuality is a sexual deviancy often accompanied by disorders that have dire consequences for our culture," wrote Steve Baldwin in, "Child Molestation and the Homosexual Movement," soon to be published by the Regent University Law Review.

Baldwin is the executive director of the Council for National Policy in Washington, D.C.
"It is difficult to convey the dark side of the homosexual culture without appearing harsh," wrote Baldwin. "However, it is time to acknowledge that homosexual behavior threatens the foundation of Western civilization – the nuclear family."

Though the homosexual community and much of the media scoff at such accusations, Baldwin – who chaired the California Assembly's Education committee, where he fought against support for the homosexual agenda in the state's public schools – says in his report that homosexual activists' "efforts to target children both for their own sexual pleasure and to enlarge the homosexual movement" constitute an "unmistakable" attack on "the family unit."

Baldwin's research is substantiated in a recently completed body of work written by Dr. Judith Reisman, president of the Institute for Media Education and author of numerous authoritative books debunking sexual myths, including "Kinsey, Crimes & Consequences."
In her thesis – also written for the Regent University Law Review – Reisman cited psychologist Eugene Abel, whose research found that homosexuals "sexually molest young boys with an incidence that is occurring from five times greater than the molestation of girls. …"

Abel also found that non-incarcerated "child molesters admitted from 23.4 to 281.7 acts per offender … whose targets were males."

"The rate of homosexual versus heterosexual child sexual abuse is staggering," said Reisman, who was the principal investigator for an $800,000 Justice Department grant studying child pornography and violence. "Abel’s data of 150.2 boys abused per male homosexual offender finds no equal (yet) in heterosexual violations of 19.8 girls."
Jay Heavener, spokesman for PFLAG – Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, counters that federal crime data refute claims that homosexuals molest children at higher rates than heterosexuals.

"According to data from the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), this claim is false," he told WND by e-mail. "The gay and lesbian community calls into question any dubious research which flies in the face of our own experience."

And Gary Schoener, a clinical psychologist who has been diagnosing and treating clergy abuse for 28 years, told Salon.com, "There are far more heterosexual cases than homosexual."

In terms of sheer numbers, that may be true. But in terms of numbers of children abused per offender, homosexuals abuse with far greater frequency; and boys, research shows, are the much-preferred target.

Baldwin says evidence he examined disproves the assertion that child molestation is more prevalent among heterosexuals. Both he and Reisman found that media coverage of adult homosexual abuse of minors is also slanted.

"The National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association (NLGJA) recently boasted that although homosexuals are less than two percent of the population, three-fourths of the people who decide the content of the front page of the New York Times are homosexual," Reisman wrote.

That one fact is especially noteworthy, experts point out, given the recent child sex scandals taking place within the American Catholic church.

A survey by WorldNetDaily of recent news reports found that rarely did the media describe priestly sexual abuse as "homosexual" or "gay" activity – even though the worst incidents involved male-to-male contact, and a spate of investigative reports has revealed that the Vatican is concerned about an upsurge of homosexuals in seminary schools throughout the world.

Gay press promotes sex with children

Baldwin says his research not only "confirms that homosexuals molest children at a rate vastly higher than heterosexuals," but it found that "the mainstream homosexual culture" even "commonly promotes sex with children."

"The editorial board of the leading pedophile academic journal, Paidika, is dominated by prominent homosexual scholars such as San Francisco State University professor John DeCecco, who happens to edit the Journal of Homosexuality," Baldwin wrote.
During his research, he also found:

The Journal of Homosexuality recently published a special double-issue entitled, "Male Intergenerational Intimacy," containing many articles portraying sex between men and minor boys as loving relationships. One article said parents should look upon the pedophile who loves their son "not as a rival or competitor, not as a theft of their property, but as a partner in the boy's upbringing, someone to be welcomed into their home."
In 1995 the homosexual magazine "Guide" said, "We can be proud that the gay movement has been home to the few voices who have had the courage to say out loud that children are naturally sexual" and "deserve the right to sexual expression with whoever they choose. …" The article went on to say: "Instead of fearing being labeled pedophiles, we must proudly proclaim that sex is good, including children's sexuality … we must do it for the children's sake."
Larry Kramer, the founder of ACT-UP, a noted homosexual activist group, wrote in his book, "Report from the Holocaust: The Making of an AIDS Activist": "In those instances where children do have sex with their homosexual elders, be they teachers or anyone else, I submit that often, very often, the child desires the activity, and perhaps even solicits it."
In a study of advertisements in the influential homosexual newspaper, The Advocate, Reisman found ads for a "Penetrable Boy Doll … available in three provocative positions. She also found that the number of erotic boy images in each issue of The Advocate averaged 14.
Homosexual newspapers and travel publications advertise prominently for countries where boy prostitution is heavy, such as Burma, the Philippines, Sri Lanka and Thailand.

Homosexuality 'youth-oriented'?

"Research on the homosexual lifestyle confirms it is almost exclusively a youth-oriented culture," Baldwin wrote. "Very few gays exhibit preference for older men."
"Some admit to focus on teenage boys," he said, "some on prepubescent boys, and many cross over between categories."

A 1988 study detailed in Baldwin's report found that most pedophiles even consider themselves to be "gay." According to the study, "Archives of Sexual Behavior," some 86 percent of pedophiles described themselves as homosexual or bisexual. Also, the study found, the number of teenage male prostitutes who identify as homosexuals has risen from 10 percent to 60 percent in the past 15 years.

When asked what he thought about critics who attempt to debunk his research, Baldwin said the results speak for themselves.

"For them to say this theory is false is to call many of the homosexual movement's leaders liars," he said. "Most of my evidence comes right from the gay community."
"I managed to find enough evidence that my thesis – child molestation is an integral part of the homosexual movement – is a valid thesis," Baldwin told WorldNetDaily.
Other experts have also found a distinct pattern between child sex abusers and the incidence of homosexuality.

"How long can psychologists be in denial about the significance of the dark side, and ignore what it implies about the homosexual condition? And there's a matter of even greater concern. How long will psychologists eagerly throw open the door to gay life for every sexually confused teenager?" writes Joseph Nicolosi, Ph.D, on behalf of NARTH – the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality – a group that says it exists to "provide psychological understanding of the cause, treatment and behavior patterns associated with homosexuality, within the boundaries of a civil public dialogue."
The North American Man-Boy Love Association, or NAMBLA, is "a group that openly promotes sex with minor boys and claims that boy-lovers respond to the needs of the boys they love," Baldwin said in his report.

The group is often endorsed by "many of the homosexual movement's most prominent leaders," he said.

Advocacy moving to schools

Promotion of the "gay and lesbian lifestyle" is increasing in the nation's public schools.
A WND survey of homosexual-oriented websites found that almost every group has some sort of program to "educate" teachers, school administrators and other school employees about the homosexual lifestyle:

GLSEN – the Gay Lesbian and Straight Education Network – bills itself as "the largest national network of parents, students, educators and others" specifically formed to end "discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity/expression in K-12 schools. Two recent press released boasted of the Broward County (Fla.) school board approving GLSEN-sponsored "training for teachers."
A student activist working with GLSEN officials has managed to "give voice" recently to "gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered students" at California schools;
PFLAG has created a national campaign called, "From Our House to the Schoolhouse," distributing to school officials – among other materials – a booklet entitled, "Just the Facts About Sexual Orientation and Youth: A Primer For Principals, Educators, & School Personnel. [Editor's note: Readers need the Adobe PDF reader to open and read this file.]

Though most school-related programs are sold to administrators and parents as programs designed simply to end persecution of homosexuals and lesbians, none disclose what Baldwin says is compelling evidence that homosexuality is harmful to children.
"What … does the academic literature say about the relationship between homosexuality and child molestation? Quite a bit, actually," he wrote, quoting data compiled by the Family Research Institute: "Scientific studies confirm a strong pedophilic predisposition among homosexuals."

The institute, after reviewing more than 19 studies and peer-reviewed reports in a 1985 "Psychological Reports" article, found that homosexuals account for between 25 and 40 percent of all child molestation.

"But this number is low," Baldwin says, "due to the fact that many reporters will not report if a child molester is a homosexual, even if he knows that to be the case."

Related story: Pedophile lawsuit goes class action? [/FONT]

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God_Owned · Jul 24, 2006

One thing I've learned from the study of the subject of Child Molestation is that Jesus is the only answer.

Yes, I believe that the penalties for child molestation should be severe, but detection and sentencing alone will not solve the problem.

This is because it is estimated that about one out of four children are molested by one or bother parents, close family member or care giver before they are twelve years old.

There is no way that this, or any other Country, can possibly support a prison system large enough to house 25% of its' population.

Personally I think that child molesters should be caned in the public square, but this isn't going to happen in the United States.

This leaves us with the first best answer to the problem which is Jesus.

Only Jesus can change the hearts of child molesters, turning them from their wretched ways.

Only Jesus has provided healing for the shattered souls of the molested and abused.

Only the blood of Jesus has the power to heal this World wide epidemic.

The Church has only scratched the surface in dealing with this issue.

There is no other answer.

Comments please!

God_Owned · Jul 25, 2006

I got this from the KCM WebPage. It may help someone who wants to forgive those who have molested them.

"Yes, you can and you must! Not next week or next month, either - you need to forgive that person today!

Spiritually speaking, unforgiveness is downright dangerous. It will make your spirit feeble and your prayers ineffective. It will pull the plug on your faith so completely that you won't have enough power to move the molehills in your life - much less the mountains.

Read Mark 11:22-25 and you'll see why I say that. There you'll find one of Jesus' most powerful teachings on faith. He concludes that teaching with these words, "And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have aught against any...."

Notice He didn't say, "When ye stand praying, try to forgive" or "When ye stand praying, forgive if you can." He simply said, "Forgive." Period.

Jesus made forgiveness a command. It would be unjust for Him to command us to do something we couldn't do. So you can be sure it's within your power to obey His command and forgive - no matter how badly you've been wronged.

Why then has it been so difficult for you to do so? Probably because you have fears that are holding you back. Most people don't realize it, but unforgiveness is actually a form of fear. Quite often we don't forgive because we're afraid of getting hurt again. We're afraid we're never going to recover from the damage that person has done to our lives.

If you want to freely forgive, get rid of those fears. Cleanse yourself from them by the "washing of the water by the word" (Ephesians 5:26). Fill your mind and heart with promises of God that apply to your situation.

If your business has been threatened by this person, for example, meditate on the fact that no weapon formed against you will prosper (Isaiah 54:17), and rely on the fact that your God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19). Let the knowledge of the merciful, protective love of God cast out all your fears (see 1 John 4:18).

Then forgive, not by feelings but by faith. Do it the same way you would receive healing or anything else by faith. First, make a quality decision. Determine that you're going to do what God's Word instructs - no matter what. You're going to forgive.

Second, speak and act in accordance with that decision. Refuse to say anything negative about that person. Refuse to rehearse in your mind or with your mouth the hurt they have caused you. Instead, look for opportunities to bless that person both in word and in deed.

Finally, don't be moved by what you feel. Forgiveness is an act of the will, not feelings. When lying symptoms of unforgiveness well up inside you, come against them in faith. Say, "Praise God, I have forgiven that person by an act of my will. In the Name of Jesus, I'm not moved by these feelings. They'll just have to get in line. They'll have to submit to the faith and the love of God that's been shed abroad in my heart."

If you'll continue to do that, I can assure you from my own experience, your feelings will change. It may not happen overnight...but it will happen. One of these days, almost without thinking, you'll throw your arms around that person, give them a big hug and say, "I love you." What's more, you'll mean it from the bottom of your heart." KCM

Preacherchick99 · Jul 31, 2006

Sorry for not responding right away--The real world has kept me SUPER Busy :]

Godown said:
Wow, how long did it take you to write this?

A VERY long time, lolz.

Godown said:
I lost weight because I would miss meals.

I know this might be wrong but I wish I had lost weight instead of gained it, lolz :]

Godown said:
I had the same experience. I went from 6 “A’s” & 2 “B’s” straight to D’s and F’s.

I totally feel ya there

Godown said:
I never had homosexual tendencies, but I did experience a bounding measure of sexual permissiveness. It was a little different in my case. It was a male parent who was the molesting a male child, that would be me.

I forgot to mention that! Yes--Sexual permissiveness does occur. That is why the person who molested me did it to me because it was done to them by a close male relative. And the person who did it to me was a close male relative of mine as well.

Godown said:
I’m glad you received help in this area.

Gosh imagine if I didn't! I'd be some raving feminist

Because that's what I use to be, lolz.

Godown said:
I wasn't told anything. I was just forced and left to deal with it. I also had the guilt and shame and fear thing, also felt cut off and painfully lonely.

Yeah I felt different too--I thought everybody goes through something like this and not just me. It became something I grew use to but I didn't like it. I never said anything to anybody because the person who molested me told me I'd get in trouble and get spanked because it's my fault.

I didn't like getting spanked--We got hit with the wooden spoon on the bare butt as children and Oooooo Lord that was painful, lolz.

Godown said:
I joined the U.S.M.C and volunteered got two tours in Vietnam so I could feel like a real man.

Well thank you for serving our country. I appreciate it very much.

Godown said:
Excellent self evaluation!

Thank you :] It wasn't easy I'll tell you that. I mean--Now I am open about it with others when ministry is concerned--But I've never spoken about it that way before. I just felt the need to desperately :]

Godown said:
I still have problems with relationships in general, suspicious of people and authority figures in particular.

Don't be--You are the head and not the tail! Above and not beneath! I'm not saying to just go and trust ppl right away right off the bat--But I am saying that you have dominion as a covenant man of God and it is your Divine Right to walk in your Authority as a part of the Royal family of God

Don't let the devil try to steal your authority--Because he has none and he wants you to think he does when he doesn't--So HA! lolz

Godown said:
I guess I forgot to mention that, aside for Dad being a homosexual pedophile, Mom was a voyeur. Also, I was adopted. My birth parents are have a story of their own.

Wow....That's just terrible :[ Not about being adopted--But what your foster mom and dad did to you :[

Godown said:
Yes, I like this attitude. This is why I’m writing a book. I believe that God told me to do it so I’m doing it. There are a lot of victims that won’t confide in others because of the shame factor, but they will order a book Online without risking exposure.

That's awesome that you are obeying God--Don't let anyone or anything stand in the way of what God has told you to do :]

Godown said:
You post demonstrates a great Spirit in you.

Thank you very much :] Ppl tell me that I have greatness on the inside of me--I recieve all of those comments, lolz.

God_Owned · Jul 31, 2006

Gosh imagine if I didn't! I'd be some raving feminist Because that's what I use to be, lolz.

I think you're safe from ever being called a feminist.

Well thank you for serving our country. I appreciate it very much.

My pleasure. Thank you!

Don't be--You are the head and not the tail! Above and not beneath! I'm not saying to just go and trust ppl right away right off the bat--But I am saying that you have dominion as a covenant man of God and it is your Divine Right to walk in your Authority as a part of the Royal family of God

Don't let the devil try to steal your authority--Because he has none and he wants you to think he does when he doesn't--So HA! lolz

Thank you!

That's awesome that you are obeying God--Don't let anyone or anything stand in the way of what God has told you to do :]

I will finish my book.

Thank you very much :] Ppl tell me that I have greatness on the inside of me--I recieve all of those comments, lolz.

You're welcome.

Don't make yourself a stranger around here for so long next time.

spiritfilledwoman · Feb 23, 2007

Godown said:
The greatest abuse of power is when an adult uses their position of authority and their physical, mental and emotional superiority to sexually molest and abuse children. This type of abuse occurs millions of times a day in this country alone.

In particular, child molestation and abuse by a parent is the highest form of betrayal that a child can experience.

Regardless of who the perpetrator is, child molestation and abuse is a destructive violation of a childs body and soul (mind, will and emotions) at every level.

There are things about childs soul which are self-evident to anyone who has been a dedicated parent or clinically observant.

Children are most susceptible to damage because their heart is, tender, developing, extremely impressionable and trusting, wide open to receive, especially from their trusted parents.

Parents are the primary sculptors of their childs mind will and emotions. The younger a child is, the easier it is to help or hurt their soul.

A child is made by God to trust their parents. In learning to trust Godly parents, children form a propensity for trusting God. Godly parents realize their most important roll in their childs life is to allow God to use them as their childs stepping stone to receiving Jesus as their Savior.

Children initially learn how, and what to think from their parents. They form lasting emotional attitudes through emotional ties to parents. Their sense of personal will as well as their intellectual, decision making and physical abilities come from their parents. They also derive their initial sense of courage and fear from their parents.

Parental love nourishes the heart of the young, while hatred and evil acts shut off a childs love trust and affection for their parents and engenders spitefulness, anger, and hatred.

Abuse received from a parent is particularly damaging to a child because of the parents position of authority, and their special place in the childs heart.

Consider the severity of damage done to a defenseless childs wide open heart, which is expecting to receive parental love, but instead receives a violent sexual assault on their body and soul from the trusted parent who is supposed to love them.

When a childs soul has been damaged, their mind, will and emotions have literally suffered some degree of tangible damage, just as certainly as a person would receive tangible brain damage if they suffered a severe blow to the head. Child sexual molestation and abuse is a violent attack on the childs soul rendering devastating and lasting damage. Gods Word leaves no doubt of the severe damage sustained when a heart is wounded and broken.

In Psalm 147:3 He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds", wounds is translated from the noun 'atstsebeth (ats-tseh'-beth) (Strong #: 6094) which means injury, wound, pain, hurt, sorrow.

The childs soul is crushed. Their sense of free will is striped by an overpowering violent force. Their confidence in their courage is shattered by fear.

Their young impressionable mind, the eye of their soul, is blinded to happiness. They have difficulty getting a fix on reality. Their crippled mental faculties produce irrational emotionally based decisions. Unforgiveness can eat away at the life of a molested and abused child.

The effects of a broken heart might include, but not limited to unexplained confusion, irrational anxiety and fear, diminished sense of self worth, mood swings, withdrawal, depression, bed wetting, nightmares, sudden unexplained aggressiveness or rebellion, irrational sudden fear of specific things, people, places, etc., stomach aches, head-aches, psychosomatic ailments, difficulty concentrating, serious depression, inability to trust others, serious confusion regarding sexual identity and compulsive self destructive behaviors, like alcohol and/or drug use, eating disorders, promiscuity, self inflicted injuries.

Abused children desire to hide the fact they were abused and deny subsequent problems because of embarrassment and shame.

Survivors of molestation and abuse are left feeling defenseless, unable to help themselves. They also lack a strong sense of self-determination, believing their future is in the hands of another. This lack of self-confidence causes them to question their courage, causing them to avoid, rather than confront, physical, intellectual and emotional challenges.

They rarely ask for help, inhibited by shame and mistrust of authority figures. Without help, they remain a prisoner of their own tortured soul, surviving on a steady diet of fear, hate and sense of helplessness.

No matter how hard they try, happiness escapes them.

It is saddening to know that the voluminous number people who request help from Clergy only represent a miniscule portion of those needing help. It is also saddening to hear from people like the KCM staff that most of these people never seem to get over the affects of childhood molestation and abuse.

Their souls rarely receives the healing needed because most don't ask for help and because of a total misconception of the nature of this damage and the failure of people to discern the difference between how healing and washing is used in the Bible.

Jesus has provided the answer.

By His stripes our souls are healed! We just need to receive it by faith.

God-owned--I hope you don't mind me resurrecting this old thread I stumbled across today. It really touched me to tears and I wanted to make a few comments if you are still working on this issue/book.

There are probably a couple of you on here who have read a post of mine where I stated that I come from an abusive family. Lots of physical, lots of emotional and yes, some sexual abuse. I really don't typically like to talk about it too much and only do so when lead to minister to others. I am especially apprehensive to do so on this forum because I don't want others thinking I am still a "victim" or otherwise in complete bondage. You all just don't know how delivered I am unless you know me in RL.

So I'm taking a big step here. My father was very angry, abusive and mentally ill man. My mother was very passive and believed that dad was the head of the home, so she stood by, knowingly letting abuse happen right in front of her. Eventually my dad convinced her it was her fault that he abused us. She quit coming home after work until very late at night because she didn't want to deal with it and because he had told her it was her fault. I don't want to go into all the yucky details on here, but I will say that I remember being beat so badly that I was literally bruised from top to bottom and unable to lay down or sit down. I would try to sleep standing up sometimes. When I wasn't being beaten, another sibling was. The only attention I ever got was during abuse. Other than that, I sat in my room alone or stayed outside. Lots of neglect and no real parenting to speak of. My maternal grandmother continually told me I was ugly and that no one would ever marry me. I overheard people on my Dad's side of the family talking at a Christmas gathering once about how my sister was pretty and would be something in life, but I wasn't and how they felt sorry for me that I wouldn't be successful because I wasn't pretty. The enemy tried to take me down on every side.

Why I am sharing this? I want people to see that when all you know is evil and abuse, it sets up thought patterns and a completely warped understanding of truth and normalcy. You don't just go up to a healing line and get delivered. Yes, there is a necessity to go through deliverance many times, but overall, it is a long slow process of clinging to God and letting Him change you, slowly, and learning to make different decisions and choosing a different way of thinking. You have to let God use His Word and His Spirit to show you the right way to look at things.

I didn't start down the healing path until my parents divorced. Almost 20 years later, I am still having God show me areas of unbelief and lack of faith that stem from things that are deep-rooted in my soul from what I went through. I can so relate and agree to this post I quoted above. The church, in my experience, is completely ill-equipped to really help victims do the hard work required to be free. I spent 10 years trying to kill myself and thank God they were unsuccessful attempts! I thought and was told God did this to me. What a lie!

If you are reading this and you have gone through something similiar, please don't turn from God. I almost did, I know the feeling. I almost rejected salvation because I thought God hated me and so why would he want me in heaven with Him? True restoration of your soul starts with making the conscious decision to change your thoughts and not dwell in your feelings. I know it's hard, I know it seems impossible. But 20 years later, I'm married to a wonderful man, depression free and full of love--something I never knew growing up and thought I'd never had. Don't let the enemy tell you that your life is over and you're doomed. You will conquer this.

I lost my family due to abuse. I grew up feeling and being completely alone. I still struggle with this. I have a weak to non-existent relationship with my family. I have long forgiven, but the years of abuse and the divorce tore my family apart and everyone has gone there own ways. Which honestly, is a good thing. I still have problems hugging people because I just didn't grow up that way. But God has me making myself more open as the years go on. Sometimes I struggle with socializing from having spent my formative years being so alone. It's a process.

Thanks God-owned for bringing to light a difficult and often brushed-over subject. I wish I had had some of the information you are sharing when I was going through this as a child. You are doing a wonderful service to the Body of Christ.

God_Owned · Feb 23, 2007

spiritfilledwoman said:
God-owned--I hope you don't mind me resurrecting this old thread I stumbled across today. It really touched me to tears and I wanted to make a few comments if you are still working on this issue/book.

There are probably a couple of you on here who have read a post of mine where I stated that I come from an abusive family. Lots of physical, lots of emotional and yes, some sexual abuse. I really don't typically like to talk about it too much and only do so when lead to minister to others. I am especially apprehensive to do so on this forum because I don't want others thinking I am still a "victim" or otherwise in complete bondage. You all just don't know how delivered I am unless you know me in RL.

So I'm taking a big step here. My father was very angry, abusive and mentally ill man. My mother was very passive and believed that dad was the head of the home, so she stood by, knowingly letting abuse happen right in front of her. Eventually my dad convinced her it was her fault that he abused us. She quit coming home after work until very late at night because she didn't want to deal with it and because he had told her it was her fault. I don't want to go into all the yucky details on here, but I will say that I remember being beat so badly that I was literally bruised from top to bottom and unable to lay down or sit down. I would try to sleep standing up sometimes. When I wasn't being beaten, another sibling was. The only attention I ever got was during abuse. Other than that, I sat in my room alone or stayed outside. Lots of neglect and no real parenting to speak of. My maternal grandmother continually told me I was ugly and that no one would ever marry me. I overheard people on my Dad's side of the family talking at a Christmas gathering once about how my sister was pretty and would be something in life, but I wasn't and how they felt sorry for me that I wouldn't be successful because I wasn't pretty. The enemy tried to take me down on every side.

Why I am sharing this? I want people to see that when all you know is evil and abuse, it sets up thought patterns and a completely warped understanding of truth and normalcy. You don't just go up to a healing line and get delivered. Yes, there is a necessity to go through deliverance many times, but overall, it is a long slow process of clinging to God and letting Him change you, slowly, and learning to make different decisions and choosing a different way of thinking. You have to let God use His Word and His Spirit to show you the right way to look at things.

I didn't start down the healing path until my parents divorced. Almost 20 years later, I am still having God show me areas of unbelief and lack of faith that stem from things that are deep-rooted in my soul from what I went through. I can so relate and agree to this post I quoted above. The church, in my experience, is completely ill-equipped to really help victims do the hard work required to be free. I spent 10 years trying to kill myself and thank God they were unsuccessful attempts! I thought and was told God did this to me. What a lie!

If you are reading this and you have gone through something similiar, please don't turn from God. I almost did, I know the feeling. I almost rejected salvation because I thought God hated me and so why would he want me in heaven with Him? True restoration of your soul starts with making the conscious decision to change your thoughts and not dwell in your feelings. I know it's hard, I know it seems impossible. But 20 years later, I'm married to a wonderful man, depression free and full of love--something I never knew growing up and thought I'd never had. Don't let the enemy tell you that your life is over and you're doomed. You will conquer this.

I lost my family due to abuse. I grew up feeling and being completely alone. I still struggle with this. I have a weak to non-existent relationship with my family. I have long forgiven, but the years of abuse and the divorce tore my family apart and everyone has gone there own ways. Which honestly, is a good thing. I still have problems hugging people because I just didn't grow up that way. But God has me making myself more open as the years go on. Sometimes I struggle with socializing from having spent my formative years being so alone. It's a process.

Thanks God-owned for bringing to light a difficult and often brushed-over subject. I wish I had had some of the information you are sharing when I was going through this as a child. You are doing a wonderful service to the Body of Christ.

Thank you so much for posting this. Your post has blessed my socks of and affirms to me the need for what I'm currently writting. :wave:

spiritfilledwoman · Feb 23, 2007

God_Owned said:
Thank you so much for posting this. Your post has blessed my socks of and affirms to me the need for what I'm currently writting.

You are most welcome! It's always hard to open up about these issues, so I appreciate your feedback and am glad it fulfilled it's purpose. I would love to see your book when it's finished and would be happy to provide any input about this subject for you if ever needed.

Optimax · Feb 23, 2007

Might check Joyce Myers website as she was abused by her father as a child.

She speaks about it often, do not know for sure if her site has info on it.

J4Jesus · Feb 23, 2007

The first and most important things I have ministered to them is to assure them it was NOT their fault. Most feel it was. And to show them the love of God they have not experienced, and tell them how much He loves and cares for them and that He has good things for them.

The hardest part but nessecary, is to gently minister to them that the Lord wants to heal them and will, but with HIS help and as an act of THEIR will, they must forgive the person first

Preacherchick99 · Feb 25, 2007

spiritfilledwoman said:
God-owned--I hope you don't mind me resurrecting this old thread I stumbled across today. It really touched me to tears and I wanted to make a few comments if you are still working on this issue/book.

There are probably a couple of you on here who have read a post of mine where I stated that I come from an abusive family. Lots of physical, lots of emotional and yes, some sexual abuse. I really don't typically like to talk about it too much and only do so when lead to minister to others. I am especially apprehensive to do so on this forum because I don't want others thinking I am still a "victim" or otherwise in complete bondage. You all just don't know how delivered I am unless you know me in RL.

So I'm taking a big step here. My father was very angry, abusive and mentally ill man. My mother was very passive and believed that dad was the head of the home, so she stood by, knowingly letting abuse happen right in front of her. Eventually my dad convinced her it was her fault that he abused us. She quit coming home after work until very late at night because she didn't want to deal with it and because he had told her it was her fault. I don't want to go into all the yucky details on here, but I will say that I remember being beat so badly that I was literally bruised from top to bottom and unable to lay down or sit down. I would try to sleep standing up sometimes. When I wasn't being beaten, another sibling was. The only attention I ever got was during abuse. Other than that, I sat in my room alone or stayed outside. Lots of neglect and no real parenting to speak of. My maternal grandmother continually told me I was ugly and that no one would ever marry me. I overheard people on my Dad's side of the family talking at a Christmas gathering once about how my sister was pretty and would be something in life, but I wasn't and how they felt sorry for me that I wouldn't be successful because I wasn't pretty. The enemy tried to take me down on every side.

Why I am sharing this? I want people to see that when all you know is evil and abuse, it sets up thought patterns and a completely warped understanding of truth and normalcy. You don't just go up to a healing line and get delivered. Yes, there is a necessity to go through deliverance many times, but overall, it is a long slow process of clinging to God and letting Him change you, slowly, and learning to make different decisions and choosing a different way of thinking. You have to let God use His Word and His Spirit to show you the right way to look at things.

I didn't start down the healing path until my parents divorced. Almost 20 years later, I am still having God show me areas of unbelief and lack of faith that stem from things that are deep-rooted in my soul from what I went through. I can so relate and agree to this post I quoted above. The church, in my experience, is completely ill-equipped to really help victims do the hard work required to be free. I spent 10 years trying to kill myself and thank God they were unsuccessful attempts! I thought and was told God did this to me. What a lie!

If you are reading this and you have gone through something similiar, please don't turn from God. I almost did, I know the feeling. I almost rejected salvation because I thought God hated me and so why would he want me in heaven with Him? True restoration of your soul starts with making the conscious decision to change your thoughts and not dwell in your feelings. I know it's hard, I know it seems impossible. But 20 years later, I'm married to a wonderful man, depression free and full of love--something I never knew growing up and thought I'd never had. Don't let the enemy tell you that your life is over and you're doomed. You will conquer this.

I lost my family due to abuse. I grew up feeling and being completely alone. I still struggle with this. I have a weak to non-existent relationship with my family. I have long forgiven, but the years of abuse and the divorce tore my family apart and everyone has gone there own ways. Which honestly, is a good thing. I still have problems hugging people because I just didn't grow up that way. But God has me making myself more open as the years go on. Sometimes I struggle with socializing from having spent my formative years being so alone. It's a process.

Thanks God-owned for bringing to light a difficult and often brushed-over subject. I wish I had had some of the information you are sharing when I was going through this as a child. You are doing a wonderful service to the Body of Christ.

Wow. This really blessed me. Thank you so much for sharing this part of your life. Especially so that I could read it. You aren't ugly and you definately aren't a nobody! Look at what your story has done so far

It is like a ripple in the water--Effecting a small area when it begins but then the ripple grows larger and larger until we cannot see the area anymore.

This has encouraged me so much

Some ppl just don't understand that this isn't a cold turkey process--It takes time. They get all judgemental when they should have patience.

Thanks G_O for writing this! Wow I just got an idea for your gansta rap name

(Sue has one [T-LIMB] Now it's your turn!)

Gee-O

Ahahahaha!! That's great

How would you minister to survivors of childhood sexual molestation...

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