Raising children right...

My kids are still snotnosed I guess (6 & 3). But I know I want them to be good, Godly people. And I know what I believe.

I hate to say it...pray about it. I know, I know. But really. Praying isn't a monologue. It's a conversation. Listen.

Be honest. Raise them to understand the importence of honesty and kindness. And humor. You can't wrong when you can laugh at yourself or the situation your in. Just the fact that you're raising kids that are not yours by birth should be an example to your kids. That shows a great deal of love. And that's something that some famililies just don't have these days.

God bless you guys.

I'm not sure if there's a fool proof formula for raising children right... as in making sure that they stay clear from ALL forms of devious behavior.

Best recommendations? Church and a nice neighbourhood/community. Open discussion too.

Honest communication. I too am taking a large role is raising my nephew and I think that's the key.

I think all any parent or acting parent can do is try their best to rase them to be good people but ultimatly it's up to them what they do.

Another thing, which I'm sure doesn't apply in YOUR case, is that it's important that the parents themselves act in an appropriate manner.

I'm not sure how many people HERE can relate, but I've seen many a households where parents curse, drink, and smoke weed in front of their children and then act surprised when their kids grow up and do the exact same stuff.

Point being, if you don't want your kids doing something, live as an example for them.

It depends on what you mean by right.

If you do get custody of your niece and nephew it would not be a good idea to immediatley expect them to conform to your ways, you'll have to take it gradually, make more allowances for them then you would with your own children.

Show them love and appreciation, overly compliment when they do something well, if they do something bad show mild disapointment but dont be over the top with discipline.

The first thing you need to do is ensure they feel comfortable and they can trust you, so treat them with love, kindness, consideration and compassion.

Pray,Pray,Pray
Let them know they can talk to you about anything.
Lead by example.
Pray,Pray,Pray
Be consistant, If you say your going to do something...Do it!
Don't give in to whining, like everybody else has one or everyone else doe's it.
Did I mention Pray,Pray,Pray

Redguard said:

I'm not sure how many people HERE can relate, but I've seen many a households where parents curse, drink, and smoke weed in front of their children and then act surprised when their kids grow up and do the exact same stuff.

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Yeah. People are surpsied that my brother and I arn't doped up retards.

Praise the Lord!

snarfywarning said:

Yeah. People are surpsied that my brother and I arn't doped up retards.

Praise the Lord!

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Halleluuuujaaaahhh!!!!

Hehe, well to try to figure out the answer to the same question myself I like to read books by Godly men and women who have done it themself. So here are a few I enjoyed if you are the reading type. Bringing Up Boys by Dr. Dobson, Babywise (1&2) and Todderwise which teach how to start self control and discipline in the first years by Dr. Buchanan and Dr. Ezzo, and The Mommy Manual by Barbara Curtis. The last book may be named for mommies but I think daddies could get someting out of it too. She has awesome thoughts on raising children to be generous not self centered, disciplined and with a strong work ethic. She does have 12 children and 5 of them are grown and with families of their own and she gets to see her principles succeed already.

My number one advice. Keep it real. Children can smell out a fake. If we live for the Lord with all of our hearts, children will see it despite our mistakes. But if we feed them dead religion, they will know that we don't really believe it ourselves.

In other words, the best way to teach children faith is to have real faith. if I live in unbelief most of my life and tell them to have faith, they will struggle with it. Same for love, respect for authority, etc. The way to teach children to respect authority is to see Mom and dad respecting authority. The best way to teach my son how to be a man of faith is for me to be a man of faith.

Of course, some things have to be taught and istruction given. But without the foundation of it being real in my life it won't work entirely.

This is the number one mistake that parents make. Not having the victory in their own life. It is also the number one thing that parents are in denial about. They will insist that they modeled faith or respect or whatever. but if you talk to grown up children, they will remember it differently. They will remember how Dad talked down to Mom or how they manipulated one another instead of trusting each other. How Dad talked badly and disrespectfully about his boss and the president and then said we should respect authority. It is not the mistakes that sway the children. we all make mistakes. It is when we say one thing and live another. It has to be real and from the heart or the children will learn to play the same games with it that we did.

Autumn - bringing in extra kids on top of your own presents its own challenge. You do need extra and professional advice. First of all, how kids do you all have, on top of your niece and nephew coming in?

Also, is raising the niece and nephew going to be a long term, permanent commitment? Lots of issues here.

If your niece and nephew are coming in from a chaotic environment, they may need extra attention and love - they are coming from their mommy and daddy, and will feel discombobulated. You will be their new daddy.

Patience, stability, attention, and a schedule of chores and activities will help keep children busy and happy. Make sure you are available to pay attention to them, to talk to them, and to love them all. Church activities and worship will help give them that regularity and stability. Don't be super harsh in the discipline department with the niece and nephew - establish boundaries, yes, but stress the stability and love in the family. The kids will need that most of all.

I will pray for you and your family's peace of mind. God bless, Christa.

Be consistant do what you say and say what you mean! Always give praise wth disipline, remember they are NOT the same, so you will have different rules for differant ages, But I think the most important thing is to know YOUR limits, know when YOU need a time out! Kids need structure, We have a set daily schedule and we keep to it as much as we can, This way they know what to look forward to, Example: No kids over on a school night. say it once mean it is no longer a issue. Homework is done in our house at the table same time everyday, haveing a schedule keeps confustion down. God Bless you for taking on extra kids!