Isn't that the question we all ask when going through something we don't understand, or fall into a pit that was not of our own doing? I can relate so much with this question. At times I feel completely abandoned by my Heavenly Father. At times I feel that I have followed Him just to get pushed down farther in the pit. Let me explain...
In my young adult life I was struggling in every area of my life. In my mid 20's I turned my life completely around for Him and I was blessed and have been blessed and have been a blessing to others until about 4 years ago. Four years ago, we felt a heaviness in our hearts to move away from everything we ever knew. In a huge step of faith, we left our friends, family, good paying jobs, new home and our way of living in a big city. We moved out of state, to no friends, no family, a very small mobile home (just for the record I have no problem living in a mobile home, I'm just explaining what we left to where we're at now) jobs that don't pay even half the bills.
I feel like we were stripped form everything that was dear to us. Not that it was our idols, because we always gave the glory to God. We were not greedy with our money, we were givers. We were not greedy with our food, we feed the homeless every Saturday on our own (not through some charity or church) This was something our family did.
The process of trying to understand why God had us move and suffer and struggle is disheartening. I just keep saying we are going through this so that when we do have our break through His name and His glory are magnified, not ours. But I can't help but wonder, when God WHEN! We've followed You, we've trusted You, we have no one to lean on but You.
Every idea that I have, every eBook or program I've created I believe God gave me. Why, why then isn't it moving? Why is it just sitting in cyberspace not helping anyone, or giving us the financial break through we've been looking for?
What more do I need to do? Is there someone in my tent that has hidden sin? When, God, When?
Trying to hold on, letting go and Letting God... trying not to worry about the bills, a roof over our heads, food on our table and clothes and shoes on my children... God, give me something, I need encouragement, it's been 4 long years.
Trusting and holding on. In Christ's name, Amen.
In my young adult life I was struggling in every area of my life. In my mid 20's I turned my life completely around for Him and I was blessed and have been blessed and have been a blessing to others until about 4 years ago. Four years ago, we felt a heaviness in our hearts to move away from everything we ever knew. In a huge step of faith, we left our friends, family, good paying jobs, new home and our way of living in a big city. We moved out of state, to no friends, no family, a very small mobile home (just for the record I have no problem living in a mobile home, I'm just explaining what we left to where we're at now) jobs that don't pay even half the bills.
I feel like we were stripped form everything that was dear to us. Not that it was our idols, because we always gave the glory to God. We were not greedy with our money, we were givers. We were not greedy with our food, we feed the homeless every Saturday on our own (not through some charity or church) This was something our family did.
The process of trying to understand why God had us move and suffer and struggle is disheartening. I just keep saying we are going through this so that when we do have our break through His name and His glory are magnified, not ours. But I can't help but wonder, when God WHEN! We've followed You, we've trusted You, we have no one to lean on but You.
Every idea that I have, every eBook or program I've created I believe God gave me. Why, why then isn't it moving? Why is it just sitting in cyberspace not helping anyone, or giving us the financial break through we've been looking for?
What more do I need to do? Is there someone in my tent that has hidden sin? When, God, When?
Trying to hold on, letting go and Letting God... trying not to worry about the bills, a roof over our heads, food on our table and clothes and shoes on my children... God, give me something, I need encouragement, it's been 4 long years.
Trusting and holding on. In Christ's name, Amen.
